The Caring Catalyst

Who Cares - What Matters

ALL-WAYS A SEASON

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In this era, where a lot of people are becoming more and more indifferent towards one another, kindness is coming at an expensive price. It is not often that you see people showing kindness towards others. BUT. . .I found this video recently where there was a prepared set of different videos to prove that wrong. Throughout the video, you can watch Santa providing warm clothes to homeless people or older woman praising stranger for doing cool tricks with skateboard and many others. As always I hope this afflicts the Caring Catalyst in you that by merely watching the video, you will realize that kindness in humanity hasn’t been lost completely and there are still people out there ready to show acts of kindness not only to their close ones, but also to any random strangers and make them emotional or even cry by their acts of kindness. THAT it’ll inspire you to bring a special warmth to Another’s CHILL.          .          .Enjoy watching the video.            .            .

AND REMEMBER:

S U M M E R I N G

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I am not the only one who
THINKS
or most certainly
F          E          E          L          S
I    T.          .          .

But I keep looking for the rest of Summer
as soon as the last sparkler loses its sparkle
on the 4th of July
which got me to thinking about things
a little beyond Summer
and this one Summer of 2025
being the last one any of us will
ever live.        .       .
h      e      n      c      e:

100 Summers                                               

100 Summers from now
I’ll be gone
and so will everyone
I know and love
(and you too, dear reader)
My name won’t be
remembered or spoken
The Okay-ness
of this is that after
100 Summers gone
is there’ll be as many
Falls, Winters and Springs
taking their places as
100 Seasons before
without much explanation
(recently written for a 15 poems in 10 day challenge for local gems)

Uhhhhhhhhh
days gone by
are never really days
g  o  n  e.        .        .        .

THE YEAR OF NO GRUDGES

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I never met Andrea Gibson, but when I first heard of her, literally in this poem a little over a year ago, I YouTube’d her and read everything she’s written and yes, sadly followed her tragic battle with cancer.  A week ago on Monday, July 14, there was something that died and escaped from me, but not her words.          .            .

The following is a post from August 26, 2024 as a way of remembering, honoring and celebrating Andrea:

I love this slap you in the face, gut punch, knee to the crotch, raw poem. I couldn’t find the written words to this poem so that you could read it, but it makes you listen a little bit more intently as the words of this poem appear as they are read and more importantly defined in you; seen through your lenses.

So what’s your favorite line? Which one resembles you the most?  Do you need to listen to it again, feel it in another way, with the lights on or off, or with or without sound canceling headphones?  How do you finish this poem that is now begun in you?  These are not questions I’m asking you so that you can gain some kind of special insight. I am asking these questions because you’ve asked yourself so many times before and the answers are there and here’s the best part about those answers: They change with time; they take on different meanings under different circumstances with different people.   So how do you answer them now or 20 years ago or next year or 20 years in the future, or now in this moment.  How do you answer them?

“THE YEAR OF NO GRUDGES” was written as a love letter to a friend Andrea was furious at. Several months ago, in the thick of anger, she reluctantly began writing down what she most appreciated about her friend. By the time she stopped typing she was so overwhelmed by gratitude she had no room in my heart for a single grudge against him. So this past week, again, quite by accident when I wasn’t even searching this came in my INBOX from another poet/writer, Phyllis Cole-Dai who was moved enough to move it my way, i.e. ONE BEGGAR SHOWING ANOTHER BEGGAR WHERE THEY GOT THE FOOD.  So Miss Andrea is sharing this poem now as a writing/feeling prompt for all of us, and for herself, in hopes that we move through our days vigilantly awake to the fact that none of us are ever promised a tomorrow. Whatever needs healing, today is the perfect day. (Music by Chris Pureka)

More Than A LISTENING

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Viktor Frankl, one of the great psychiatrists of the twentieth century, survived the death camps of Nazi Germany. His little book, Man’s Search for Meaning, is one of those life-changing books that everyone should read, SEVERAL TIMES

Frankl once told the story of a woman who called him in the middle of the night to calmly inform him she was about to commit suicide. Frankl kept her on the phone and talked her through her depression, giving her reason after reason to carry on living. Finally she promised she would not take her life, and she kept her word.

When they later met, Frankl asked which reason had persuaded her to live?

“None of them”, she told him.

What then influenced her to go on living, he pressed?

Her answer was simple, it was Frankl’s willingness to listen to her in the middle of the night. A world in which there was someone ready to listen to another’s pain seemed to her a world in which it was worthwhile to live.

Often, it is not the brilliant argument that makes the difference. Sometimes the small act of listening is the greatest gift we can give.

WHEN YOU HOLD SOMEONE’S SPACE; when you unconditionally accept, listen, hear, validate, affirm, you just don’t hold their space, you hold something even more sacred: THEIR SOUL.           .            .
THEY have trusted you with their whole, wounded, vulnerable Soul for the price of your offering to A LISTENING they never before had but desperately needed.        .        .

A LETTER TO YOUR HIGH SCHOOL SELF

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IT IS GRADUATION SEASON.                .             .Yesterday, I had two granddaughters graduate from High School; unfortunately, one was in Wheeling, WV and the other here at the Stocker Center at LCCC in Elyria.  Erin and I split up as she attended Stella’s in Elyria and I headed to Wheeling for Ava’s.  Both of them made me think a little deeper as I have now graduated three separate times, watched my children graduate and now my granddaughters (with four more looming graduations in the future) all of which that got me thinking about their future and ours, a future, not even on our best days, we can predict.

The word commencement is derived from the French and was first used to refer to graduation in the 14th century.  (Uhhh, yeah, back when I was in school…SMILE).  It makes me think of a pediatric social worker who once told me, “Children love to anticipate.  They need something every day to look forward to in the short term and the long term.”  And I thought, “Gee, I like that idea as an adult.”  During these last 45 +years of ministry I’ve tried to make it my business to assure our folks that something good and exciting and needed is going to happen on a regular basis.  Do they feel it’s right and normal to graduate from old ideas and commence with new ones that help us grow and serve each other better?  It’s the season, so I wish all of you a happy commencement.

With Proms mostly over and High School Graduations very much on the the horizon, somehow this song, these words seem very appropriate.          .         .

Letter To My High School Self (Be Kind) By JJ Heller, David Heller, and Ginny Owens

I’m writing you this letter ‘Cause I’ve walked in your shoes I hope that you will read this When you’re feeling confused

The hardest part of high school Is living in between The person you’re becoming And the kid you used to be

Dizzy from highs and lows You can’t see which way to go I’ve been there too Here’s what you do

Be kind Be strong Believe You belong Love God Work hard Just be who you are

You want to feel important But don’t be fooled by fame ‘Cause everyone who loves you Already knows your name

And when you have a house someday There won’t be trophies on display There’s so much more Worth living for

Be kind Be strong Believe You belong Love God Work hard Just be who you are

Let go of the last times Celebrate the first times And keep your heart wide open

Be kind Be strong Believe You belong Forgive Yourself Don’t be afraid to ask for help Love God Work hard Just be who you are.     .      .
AND JUST WHAT WOULD YOU WRITE TO YOUR HIGH SCHOOL SELF
Psssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssst.     .     .
THAT HIGH SCHOOL SELF
IS STILL HERE
Hopefully
L I S T E N I N G
L E A R N I N G
L O V I N G
(always loving, hoping for a little love in return and finding, having, keeping it)

WHAT A WONDERFUL WORLD

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.          .          .And JUST LIKE THAT
it’s 2024
A NEW YEAR
Whether a new year fills you with excitement or dread (or maybe a mix of both!), the hope is that when you look back on 2023
there are too many wonderful moments to count
which serve has the greatest foundation
for new memories to be
m a d e.     .     .
ALL WAYS Remembering that

which are gentle reminders
between old and new years of

Letting us each know in between all of the Seasons
Past
Present
Prospective
“May God bless and keep you always
May your wishes all come true
May you always do for others
And let others do for you
May you build a ladder to the stars
And climb on every rung
May you stay forever young

May you grow up to be righteous
May you grow up to be true
May you always know the truth
And see the lights surrounding you
May you always be courageous
Stand upright and be strong
And may you stay forever young

May your hands always be busy
May your feet always be swift
May you have a strong foundation
When the winds of changes shift
May your heart always be joyful
May your song always be sung
And may you stay forever young.”
And may you stay forever young.”
Photo in New York, by John Cohen (1962)

Here’s hoping
the New Year exceeds your expectations
and a tad past your
i M a G i N a T i O n

 

SEND ME A SIGN

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It’s the one pandemic that can be eliminated from this world one person at a time

I    F.               .               .

Introducing the 2024 charity Christmas video and advert, inspired by the heartwarming John Lewis Christmas adverts. The charity single, “Send Me a Sign,” has been created to make a meaningful difference. Re-engage and Friends of the Elderly, helping to bring support and companionship to those facing loneliness every day.          .          .

Who knew.          .          .
You could make a huge difference to Someone just by reaching out,
checking in,
being YOU
IN THIS
SEASON OF LIGHTS
BE YOUR OWN PERSONAL
SEASON OF CHANGE FOR ANOTHER

YES, PLEASE and THANK YOU

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T            H            I             S
is a picture that needs no caption
especially TIME of the year
when our already hectic lives go in to
C         H         A         O           S
m o d e
CRAZY ON STEROIDS.             .              .
where calm feels like just a word
but not a feeling
or another WAY.       .      .
which is why I dug deep into my files
and with the help of the
GREATER GOOD Editors
have provided some much needed
r e s p i t e
(IF YOU’LL TAKE IT TO HAVE IT)

Good Resources for Thriving Over the Holidays

Here are some articles that explore holiday stress management, managing conflict, picking gifts, making resolutions, and more.          .         .

The holidays can be rough—really rough at times; so here are literally dozens of articles and that try to help readers navigate the issues that arise when far-flung family members gather, everyone expects a present, and they all have an opinion. There are also some collected articles on making sense of this quickly-almost-gone-previous year and looking ahead to the new one. However you celebrate or are celebrated, here’s wishing you some severely-well-deserved-happy holidays!

Click to jump to a section:

Holiday stress management
New ways to think about gifting and celebration
The psychology of generosity and gratitude
Raising generous, grateful kids
Looking ahead to the new year

Holiday stress management

New ways to think about gifting and celebration

The psychology of generosity and gratitude

Raising generous, grateful kids

Looking ahead to the new year

It’s enough to just not get your wires crossed but to literally,
BLOW A CIRCUIT.            .          .
and here’s the biggest kicker of all,
it’s not that we don’t have the
R E S O U R C E S
of countless
WHAT TO DO’S
(uhhhhhhhhhhhh did you see how long this blog post is, already)
so much as utilizing them
plugging some of them in
and unplugging a few others
B                           U                          T
will you.          .         .

It just may be all of the difference between a really good or a really bad
h    o    l    i    d    a    y
(AND YOU GET TO CHOOSE.  .  .or let it CHOOSE FOR YOU)

NOT JUST ANOTHER DAY AFTER

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One of my favorite memories for years on end was one that I was never a part of.

It was always the day after Thanksgiving and very early after coffee and nut roll and a light breakfast, my sister, my mother, my grandmother, and sometimes my aunt would all venture either downtown, or in very later years, to the mall to do what to shop fericiously, even before there was a Black Friday.

And shop they did; they invented the phrase SHOP TILL YOU DROP, and they literally would come home exhausted with packages upon packages, most of them not wrapped because that was another venture, too. They would come home to what hungry people, mostly the kids and the guys who didn’t go shopping all day but sat around and watched football and waited and waited and waited for the girls to come home so that they could scarf down the reheated Thanksgiving dinner that we had the night before.  It was the same dinner and yet, somehow, it tasted better if that’s possible; maybe the tired but happy hands that prepared it was just the PINCH of that little something, something that made it taste better; no matter, it was delicious, even in memory form these 55-60 years later.

Why did it always taste better then?  Why would a memory like this bring so much peace when I wasn’t even a part of it?  But what I was a part of, the very fact of that feeling that it brought me when I can still hear the crunch of the gravel knowing that they were home safely and what was about the follow was another great meal even better family time and sometimes a game of trivia pursuit.  It defined fun in a way a dictionary never has been able to capture.  It brought peace in a way that nice ocean waves or a calm lake or a babbling. brook never could interpret.  And what it brought most of the time couldn’t be defined, or couldn’t be explained and even now barely understood, even all of these years later.  But the thought of it, the memory in my crevices, I can experience it all over again even taste it, so much so, there’s nothing that can be opened out of a can or brought out of a refrigerator or re-heated that equals it.

That was Thanksgiving in a way that didn’t just last a day or a weekend but continued throughout the season because we all knew what was going to follow: More shopping, the baking of cookies and yes, Christmas and better still the week between Christmas and New Year’s. It was a Wonderland that to this day transforms me to a WANDERLAND, one that you never wanted to wander away from. Even now I wander back into that amazing Wonder, not wanting to leave thinking, knowing nothing can ever compare or replace it.

So you see it’s not just a day after, it’s an everlasting day that was, that is, and thankfully right now, as long as my memory holds out, will always be.          .          .

As much as you JUST

celebrated THANKSGIVING

.         .          .and even though your Stomach might still be full,

I hope your heart is EMPTY enough to

truly continue this Season of

T     H     A     N     K     S
G           E          T          T          I          N          G

.          .          .may it be way better than you have planned

or    i m a g i n e d
(as you WANDER through your WONDER of yesteryears)

YOUR THANKSGIVING TABLE

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In this special Thanksgiving of The Caring Catalyst Blog,  my invitation is to have you go and be the reason another can be thankful, because the best table to ever be around isn’t the one with endless food; it’s the one with ongoing and everlasting sustenance that satisfies every hunger, quenches every thirst, binds up every wound, and makes every heart less lonely as it welcomes, always welcomes and never disappoints.
THIS will be the mysterious blessing of:
AS YOU FEED SO SHALL YOU BE FED
and full, ever full will your Soul be.          .          .          .

Pssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssst:
Even if you don’t like what folks
bring to the
T A B L E.    .    .
NEVER LET THEM EAT ALONE

HAPPY THANKSGIVING

Professional Speaker, Author, Assurance Man