Y U M S
A simple SNICKERS Candy Bar
in the supermarket
is worth about $0.50 on sale. . .
The same bottle in a bar costs $1 in a vending machineIn an airport gift shop or hotel it can be worth up to $3 or maybe even more. . .
The SNICKERS bar is the same, the only thing that changes is the
P L A C E
Each place gives a different value to the same product.
When you feel like you are worth nothing
and everyone around you belittles you,
CHANGE PLACES
DO NOT
stay there. . .
Have the courage to change places
and go to a place
where you are given
the value you deserve. . .
Surround yourself
with people who really appreciate
YOUR WORTH. . .
Don’t settle for less!
and ABRACADABRA
You will find
YOUR MORE
will add to Some One Else’s
L E S S. . .Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. . .
SNICKER
SNICKER
The Certainty of UNCERTAINTY
QUESTIONS
QUESTIONS
QUESTIONS
They abound
and there’s no more fertile soil for
U N C E R T A I N T Y
than not always coming up
with the
R I G H T
Answers. . .
Sometimes life feels like a ginormous
Multiple Choice Test
but maybe the
Certainty
in the
Uncertainty
is that there really are
NO WRONG
answers
or. . .
simply discovering:
One Upside to the Feeling of Uncertainty
A new study finds that feeling uncertain may lead us to savor the small things in life. . .
Kira M Newman is the managing editor of Greater Good and she helps us take a different look and maybe even a new perspective on how we actually view UNCERTAINTY. Her work has been published in outlets including the Washington Post, Mindfulmagazine, Social Media Monthly, and Tech.co, and she is the co-editor of The Gratitude Project. Follow her on Twitter!

Ever since it began, the pandemic has been a crash course in uncertainty. Safe behaviors, school openings, vaccination timelines, the job market, new variants—these have all seemed to change on a weekly basis, threatening our sense of security and stability.
Uncertainty is stressful and perhaps even harmful to our health, research suggests, and it can drive us to cling to our social groups to the exclusion of others. But a new study has uncovered a surprising upside to feeling uncertain: It might drive us to appreciate the little things in life.
Smell the roses
In one experiment, researchers stationed on a sidewalk handed out flyers that said one of two things: “Life is unpredictable: Stop and smell the roses” or “Life is constant: Stop and smell the roses.” A short distance away was a table with a dozen red roses on it and a sign matching the flyer they’d just received.
Research assistants hid behind a bush to see who stopped and who didn’t—and it was the people who read that life is unpredictable who buried their noses in the fragrant flowers, 2.5 times more often than the others.
Why? Savoring and appreciating the small things in life may be a coping response that our minds activate when we feel overwhelmed by the ambiguity of it all. Savoring pulls us out of fears and worries about a fuzzy future and into the clear, pleasurable sensations of right now.
“If the world is uncertain, it makes sense to take advantage of what you have now because it may not exist shortly,” explains Andrew L. Gregory, the lead author of the study.
The researchers found similar results in another experiment, where, instead of handing out flyers, they recruited nearly 400 people to watch videos. Some saw a video purportedly describing the conclusions from a scientific conference about how unpredictable and random our lives are, accompanied by chaotic graphs and rolling dice. Others saw a similar video, but with the opposite message, about life’s underlying order and structure. A final group saw a video about the history of trains.
Compared to the other two groups, those who watched the chaos video reported more intentions to savor life. They said that they should enjoy the present and appreciate simple things, and would linger on good feelings if something wonderful happened to them or a friend.
Savoring in real life
A final set of findings suggests that this effect does translate to everyday life, even if you don’t happen to come across a video or flyer about uncertainty. Here, researchers recruited over 6,000 people and pinged them up to a dozen times a day, asking how chaotic and unpredictable the world felt in that moment and whether they were savoring the present.
It turned out that when the world felt messy, people were more likely to be savoring their lives a few hours later, at the next ping.
Of course, the relentless uncertainty of the pandemic doesn’t lend itself to feeling mindful and appreciative all the time. But Gregory suspects that this pattern still holds.
Indeed, many people reported feeling grateful early on in the pandemic. One of our Thnx4 members, for example, journaled about missing out on her daily socializing at the neighborhood cafe and instead making small talk with strangers on her morning walk. “It reminded me not only to appreciate but to seek positive experience,” she wrote.
While savoring may happen naturally, it’s also something we can practice deliberately when life feels unsettling. For example, you might share your good news or gratitude with others, or tune into the enjoyable sights, sounds, and smells around you. When you work on controlling your attention this way, Gregory says, you may feel like you have more control over your life in general.
The flyers and videos in these experiments are a good reminder that our sense of uncertainty is changeable. Based on that, it makes sense that reading political news or social media posts from our friends could influence how stable or chaotic our lives feel. Being selective about the media we consume could help. Or, says Gregory, when we’re feeling adrift, we could try reflecting on times in our life when we felt secure and certain.
Savoring isn’t the only potential upside to feeling uncertain. For people who are less well off, confronting a chaotic environment can actually drive them to prioritize community. In these ways and perhaps others, our brains try to protect us from the unpleasant but unavoidable uncertainty of life.
JUST HOW UNCERTAIN
Are you
of your
CERTAINITIES. . .
Go ahead. . .
Take a
DEEP BREATH
and
S A V O R
your doubts
until they become
the sweetest
TREATS
of your
L I F E
THE ME IN ME
It’s not the first time I have shared a J J Heller song/video on
MONDAY VIDEO BLOG DAYS
and no, it most likely won’t be the last. . .
I loved this for the same reasons
J J herself liked it:
“So I’ll sing a song that only I can sing – A melody nobody knows but me
A million things I could pretend to be – Maybe the best thing I can be is me.”
When I saw the film “Bethany Hamilton: Unstoppable,” I cried. Her story stirred something in my heart. Her tenacity and courage in the face of all sorts of adversity is inspiring (to say the least). But I think what moved me most was her decision to keep surfing even after her accident.
She loves surfing. She comes alive when she’s in the water. It’s who she is.
So she made the brave choice to keep chasing what she loves. Even though it’s harder to surf with one arm. Even though there might be sharks in the water.
Maybe you’re facing adversity right now, and it’s tempting to change who you are… to take the path of least resistance and pretend to be someone you’re not.
But please don’t. The world needs who God made you to be.
YOU HAVE A SONG TO SING!
Very special thanks to Bethany Hamilton, her team and Unstoppable – The Film for partnering with us on this music video. Thanks also to the lovely Joy Prouty for the footage of me singing my heart out on the porch and to Jilian Linklater for helping us write this special song.
. . .and so the only true thing that really matters right now
isn’t so much whether or not you like the video or even the song
so much as
YOUR RESPONSE
YOU ARE NOT ONE IN A MILLION. . .
there’s only ONE YOU
and it’s not only
E N O U G H;
but The World is in desperate need of
THE ONLY YOU
y o u
BRING–
THE YOU IN YOU!
C R A Z I E S
T H I S
is just like us
. . .a mess
Until we come together
amazing things happen. . .
when your crazy
meets my crazy
and we know that it just fits
I T
doesn’t just feel like Christmas
it is
C H R I S T M A S
forever
NOW
Multiple that
with half the people in the world
with the other half people the world
And this world
just doesn’t become a crazy place
it becomes a craziest
of the craziest place
And
ON EARTH
AS IT IS IN HEAVEN
BECOMES THE CRAZIEST
OF THE CRAZIEST
NORMAL
OF ALL
FOR ALL
FOR AN EVER
ALL. . . .
Connect
them
l i n e s
THE CONFUSING

I Question
what I QUESTION
A L L
W A Y S
and the
BIGGEST
QUESTIONING OF ALL
is when I
QUESTION
NOT AT ALL
and this
in
UN-MATHEMATICAL TERMS
is
THE CONFUSING
. . .GET IT?
It’s the most precarious
balancing act
of all time:
THAT
razor thin line
bEtWeEn
CURIOSITY
(which we know kills the cat)
and
QUESTIONING
wanting to truly
experience
the
WHY
the
HOW COME
the
WHAT FOR

THE CURE. . .
QUESTION EVERYTHING
HOW COME,
IT
WHAT FOR,
IT
WHY
IT
like a little kid
asking for an ice cream cone
on a hot Summer’s Day
before Dinner
you’re not going to get
until later
and keep
A S k I n G
until you get the
p r o v e r b i a l
“BECAUSE I SAID SO”
and then risk
the ice-cream cone
the late dinner
an early bedtime
an extended
TIME OUT
by starting all over again
with a not-not-so-whimpered:
W H Y. . .

THE MORAL:
Never give up the
Q U E S T I O N I N G
for a
JUST BECAUSE
. . .sometimes the greatest way to remove
THE CONFUSING
is the be
(the inexplicable)
the cause of it

. . .OR THE CHIEF REMOVAL OF IT
A Prayer’s PRAYER
I’ve always been a Mary Oliver fan
but I’ll also admit that I’ve read much more of her
now that she’s dead
than when she was alive
I suppose which not only makes her
not only more Alive
than ALIVE
but still doing
what she did the best
(and still is)
S H A R E

As I page
through this Anthology
I often have the same feeling
that I have when I heard her voice
reading this poem
with a resounding
E C H O I N G
of when you need a prayer
notice that nothing all around you
is miraculously short of that
with the worldly unspoken invitation:
WHEN YOU DON’T HAVE A PRAYER
B E
O N E

(The only true prayer you’ll ever need
is the one you are)
An Original Caring Catalyst

Look familiar. . .
Even remotely aware of him. . .
The following might not be much more of a clue
to the World
or even to a select few:
On July 1, 2021, Rev. Dr. Roger Raymond Fischer, of Washington, was taken by God’s twin Angels, Goodness and Mercy, who came to pick Roger up, and they did. So God wrapped his arms around Roger and said, “Well done Good and Faithful Servant.” His was a life well done. Born June 1, 1941, in Washington, he was the son of Raymond and Louise Gartley Fischer.
Roger was a 1959 graduate of Washington High School. While in college, Roger worked as an American Red Cross, YMCA life guard and saving and swimming instructor. Roger received a Bachelor of Arts in Mathematics and Physics from Washington and Jefferson College in 1963. He received a Master’s Degree with Honors from the Lutheran Seminary at Gettysburg in 1991. In 1998, he was granted a Doctor of Ministry Degree from the Pittsburgh Theological Seminary as the author of “Christian Advocacy and the Local Congregation.” Roger was ordained January 13, 1990, in First Lutheran Church, Washington. He served numerous churches in Southwestern Pennsylvania and West Virginia. The last congregations that he served were Calvary Lutheran in Scenery Hill, Buena Vista Presbyterian and Hyland Brotheran.
While working as a research engineer for Jones and Laughlin Steel, Roger was elected to the Pennsylvania House of Representatives from the 47th District, serving from 1966 to his retirement in 1988. At age 25 he was one of the youngest members to serve in the history of the Pennsylvania General Assembly, serving also as Chairman of the House Education Committee and on the State Board of Education. Roger served for nine terms as President of the Association of Retired Pennsylvania House of Representatives and Senate Members. He was elected to the Washington School Board in 1965 and inducted into the Pennsylvania Voter Hall of Fame for voting in every primary and general election since 1962.
Commissioned in 1966, Roger served as a Lieutenant Colonel U.S. Air Force Reserve. He was a member of the American Legion Post 175, 40 et 8, Sons of the American Revolution, and Sons of the American Revolution Chaplain. He was a Boy Scout merit badge counselor and a member of the Order of the Arrow. Roger was also a member of the Washington Lodge No, 164 Free & Accepted Masons, Washington Royal Arch Chapter No. 150, Jacques DeMolay Commandery No. 3 Knights Templar, and Noble of the Syria Shrine.
Roger enjoyed a lifetime of sports and fitness as demonstrated by becoming a two time finisher of the Ironman Triathlon in Hawaii. Additionally, he ran many other triathlons and marathons including Boston (four times), New York (four times), Pittsburgh, Honolulu and Philadelphia. At age 74, Roger completed the Disney World Marathon. He was a member of the Pennsylvania Council on Physical Fitness and was founder and race director of the “Washington Express” 10K run. In 2008, he bicycled across America in sections. Roger was inducted in Washington-Greene Chapter of the Pennsylvania Sports Hall of Fame and was unanimously elected to the Executive Committee. Roger was a life member of the Appalachian Trail Club, Keystone Trail Association, Warrior’s Trail Association and the Maine Appalachian Trail Club. Across 32 years, hiking in sections, Roger completed the entire 2,174.1 mile Appalachian Trail on September 17, 2004.
In 1998, Roger received an Honorary Doctor of Divinity from Washington and Jefferson College and delivered the Baccalaureate sermon for his son Steven’s commencement. In 1994, Roger delivered the main address for W&J’s Honors Convocation.
Roger treasured his time with his family. He enjoyed world traveling with his wife Kitty to places such as Europe, South Africa, Australia, Tahiti and China. He was very happy to have visited all the continents except Antarctica.
Roger is survived by Catherine “Kitty” Trettel Fischer, his wife of 48 years; two sons, Roger Raymond II (Marcia) and Steven Gregory (Heather); and a daughter, Catherine “Katy” (John) Herold; and five grandchildren, Abigail, John “Jack” and Maxwell Fischer, and Elijah and Ezekiel Herold; and a brother, Terry.
Obituaries are almost the Charlie Brown teacher of the newspaper or what’s left of them. They are the Wawa Wawa Wawa summations of Someone’s life. At best, they provide a summary of how a person was; what they leave behind, and specifically who is most affected because of their death. But make no mistake, there’s much, very much that they leave out.
Roger’s obituary gave no smidgen of a hint of all of the lives he Touched, specifically mine. I’ve heard it said that when we are born each of us are given a fingerprint which is distinctive to ourselves; it’s a fingerprint that no one else has or can ever have so that we can make an imprint on other lives that no one else can or ever will. Roger more than did that for, TO ME!

I can’t remember a time when I didn’t know Roger; but specifically he was a Sunday school teacher of mine in seventh and eighth grade and also taught our Catechism class at First Lutheran Church in Washington, Pennsylvania. It was there that I remember one Saturday morning when I was not allowed to go to basketball practice because I had to go to Catechism class at 9 o’clock in the morning and I literally erupted in the class, complaining about how stupid this was and how much I did not want to be there and how I really HATED the Church; ANY CHURCH! Even though there was about 14 or 15 in the class, Roger treating me like I was the only one that was there that day, at that moment and he didn’t react; he responded. The fact he congratulated me and told me how brave it was for me to speak my truth was huge and affirming. And then, with one simple question, he convicted, changed my life path:
“WHY DON’T YOU DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT?”
Which made me irrupt even further as if you could reload a fire crackers it was already burning hot.
“DO SOMETHING,!” I yelled. “I’M JUST 13 YEARS OLD! WHAT CAN I DO?”
And again, in pure Roger fashion, he replied back as if I was the only person there, the only person in the World that had his ear, his attention:
“ANOTHER GOOD POINT, CHARLIE, (something I hated anyone to call me) BUT IT HAS BEEN MY EXPERIENCE IF YOU WANT TO CHANGE SOMETHING, YOU DON’T COMPLAIN ABOUT IT FROM THE OUTSIDE, YOU GO INSIDE AND DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT!”
B U S T E D
and even more
C O N V I C T E D
Up until that point when people would ask me, “what are you gonna do when you grow up?” I would, without hesitation answer, I was going to be a professional basketball player and I was going to be a teacher and a coach but never, no way ever, EVER a minister.
Now countless times over the past nearly 50 years when people ask me why did you become a minister, they kind of wait for me to give him this great spiritual, unbelievable mountaintop experience testimony, and instead I tell them it’s because I hate the church and then I tell them the story about Roger and me one Saturday morning at a Catechism class that I didn’t want to be at, but now ever so grateful that I attended that day.
We kept in touch throughout the years and he knew the personal impact of that story because I made sure that I told him and with every chance that I got and profusely thanked him and the times I blamed him for what he did to me by making me go into the ministry. He told me never to expect an apology and I told him I wasn’t asking for one.
So after all the Wawa Wawa Wawa Wawa–ing of a Charlie Brown teacher during this blog, you may still not know personally Roger Raymond Fisher, or even care that much, but mine is a shore his Tsunami has radically wrecked that made it impossible to rebuild in a way my imagination could ever conjure up; it’s caused severely significant after shocks that have created tidal waves in me that have touched countless other shores, Roger had no understanding or fathoming; still are. Little did I know that Roger was A Caring Catalyst long before I knew what one was, let alone striving to be a better one each day. There’s only five true words that are left to be said by me. But oh my, are they most sincere:
THANK YOU;
SEE YOU LATER

WAWAWA THAT, Charlie
MIND WANDERER

ARE YOU ONE. . .
I’ve had some of my greatest dreams
why I’ve been open-wide-eyed awake
. . .YOU?
I schedule time
R E G U L A R L Y
to do some serious
MIND WANDERING
and it’s brought about
not only
blog posts
presentations
sermons
CHUCK-IT’S like:

a n d

a n d

. . .and so many others you’ve yet to even glimpse yet
because what once was criticized often to me
from countless Teachers and Professors
who claimed that I wasn’t
FOcusEd
and I’ll never get anywhere
D A Y D R E A M I N G
had no idea
that it was all of the puzzle pieces
that were coming together
willy-NillIE
to make up
mE. . .
IT ALL MADE ME START
w o n d e r i n g
exactly WHAT:
What Daydreaming Does to Your Mind
NOW:
Science suggests that mind-wandering freely to more pleasant and playful thoughts may improve our mood and foster creativity. . .
JILL SUTTIE, Psy.D., is Greater Good’s former book review editor and now serves as a staff writer and contributing editor for the magazine. She received her doctorate of psychology from the University of San Francisco in 1998 and was a psychologist in private practice before coming to Greater Good.
Jill game me some new insight and made me a big believer in daydreaming now and then—especially when I’m out walking. There’s something about being in nature, making motion that helps me let go of daily cares and allows my mind to wander where it will, which feels great and often jumpstarts my creativity as a writer and a speaker.

I admit, though, I’ve been troubled by research showing how mind-wandering could make me less productive or depressed—the last thing I need! But it turns out this gap between personal experience and science may best be explained by how researchers have lumped together different kinds of mind-wandering. Not all research has differentiated between depressive rumination (like replaying an ongoing disagreement with our spouse in our minds) and pleasant daydreaming (letting our minds wander freely).
Now, some newer science is painting a more nuanced picture of what happens to us when we let our minds wander. Though the research is young and growing, it suggests that daydreaming may actually make us happier and more creative—if we do it the right way.
Daydreaming may be good for creativity
Anecdotally, mind-wandering has been associated with creativity for centuries. But this link to creativity may depend on the type of mind-wandering you do, as a new study by the University of Calgary’s Julia Kam and her colleagues suggests.
In this study, researchers used electroencephalogram technology to see what happens in our brains when we are engaged in different types of mind-wandering. To do that, they had people perform a mundane, repetitive task and interrupted them occasionally to see what they were thinking about, while continuously monitoring their brain activity.
Some participants reported thoughts that Kam calls “constrained,” involving things like ruminating over a fight with a spouse or thinking about how to manage a work problem. While these thoughts were not related to the task at hand, they were still somewhat focused. Others reported thoughts that were “freely moving”—meaning, they skipped from thing to thing—perhaps daydreaming about a future vacation in Italy, then wondering if they needed a new bathing suit, then fantasizing about an old flame.
When Kam and her colleagues matched people’s thoughts to their concurrent brain activity, they found signature patterns for different types of mind-wandering. In particular, freely moving thoughts were associated with increased alpha waves in the brain’s frontal cortex—a remarkable and novel finding, says Kam.
“What’s really striking about finding this neural marker is that it’s been implicated during studies of creativity,” she says. “When you introduce alpha oscillation in the frontal cortex, people perform better on creative tasks.”
This kind of brain activity maps well on to one particular aspect of creativity—divergent thinking or thinking “outside the box,” she says. When you’re generating ideas, you want to be able to go in many directions and not be constrained, which freely moving thought allows.
Mind-wandering has also been shown to enhance convergent thinking: what happens after you’ve brainstormed ideas and have to pick the best of the bunch, she adds. So, it’s likely that mind-wandering serves a creative purpose.
“If a problem has built up in your mind and you need to find a solution, letting it go into the background for a bit probably helps,” she says. “Mind-wandering facilitates the kind of solution that just comes to you, as in a lightbulb moment.”
This mirrors results from a 2015 study conducted by Claire Zedelius, formerly of the University of California, Santa Barbara. She looked at how mind-wandering affected people’s performance on a creativity test where they have to come up with a novel word (e.g., “food”) that fits with three seemingly unrelated words (e.g., “fish, fast, and spicy”). She found that people who mind-wandered performed better on this task, the answer coming to them in a flash rather than through methodically testing different solutions.
“People don’t even know how they got to the solution—it was just suddenly there,” she says. “Mind-wandering helps with ‘aha’ types of problem-solving.”
In a more recent study, Zedelius looked at the contents of people’s thoughts to see how that related to everyday creativity (outside of a lab setting). Participants, including some creative writers, were prompted via cell phones throughout the day to report on the nature of their thoughts and, at the end of the day, how creative they had been. Findings showed that people’s minds often wandered to fairly mundane things—like planning for a later shopping trip—and that these thoughts had no effect on creativity.
But when people’s minds wandered in more fantastical ways (playing out implausible fantasies or bizarre, funny scenarios, for example) or in ways that seemed particularly meaningful to them, they tended to have more creative ideas and feel more inspired at the end of the day, too. Interestingly, this was true for both writers and everyday people.
“Writers probably do this for their creative process all the time—thinking through stories, considering ‘what ifs’ or unrealistic or bizarre scenarios,” says Zedelius. “But lay people will also do this more to be more creative.”
This suggests that the link between mind-wandering and creativity is more complicated than previously thought. It seems to depend on how freely moving your thoughts are, the content of your thoughts, and your ability to be removed from everyday concerns. No doubt, this explains why my daydreaming on a hiking trail has led to song or story ideas that seem to bubble up from nowhere.
Mind-wandering can help boost our mood
Prior research suggests a wandering mind is an unhappy mind: We tend to be less happy when we’re not focused on what we’re doing. And that’s likely true, if you tend to rehash past mistakes or replay social flubs when your mind wanders, or if your mind-wandering keeps you from fulfilling your goals.
Again, the content of wandering thoughts makes a big difference. For example, as one 2013 study showed, when people found their wandering thoughts more interesting, their moods actually improved while mind-wandering. Similarly, other studies have found that thinking about people you love or thinking more about your potential future than about what happened in the past produces positive results.
How you use mind-wandering may also be important. In some cases, people intentionally mind-wander—something that has been mostly unexplored in the research, but likely has distinct effects. As one 2017 study found, people who use daydreaming for self-reflection typically have more pleasant thoughts than people who simply ruminate on unpleasant experiences.
There is even some evidence that mind-wandering may be more of an antidote to depression than a cause. People who are depressed may simply replay events from their past to better understand what happened to cause their dark mood and avoid future problems. Also, when researchers studied whether a negative mood preceded or followed a mind-wandering episode, they found poor moods led to more mind-wandering but not vice versa, suggesting that mind-wandering may be helping people feel better.
Now, findings from a 2021 study suggest that mind-wandering that is more freely moving can actually improve your mood.
In this study, participants were prompted randomly via cell phone over three days to report how they were feeling (positive versus negative) and how much their thoughts were freely moving and related to what they were doing (or not).
After analyzing the data, the researchers found that when people’s thoughts were off-task, they generally felt more negative—similar to what earlier findings showed. But if their thoughts were free-moving, it had the opposite effect, helping people feel happier.
“Our findings suggest there might be positive aspects of mind-wandering,” the researchers conclude.
Again, I find that science supports my own experience. If I simply put myself in a space that lets my mind move freely, I don’t get depressed. On the contrary, I’m happier because of it.
Can we be better mind-wanderers?
While the research on this is still young, it does indicate there may be a right and a wrong way to mind-wander.
Kam warns that mind-wandering when you need to be focused on a task (or risk hurting yourself or others—like if you’re driving or doing surgery) could be problematic. But, she says, if you let your mind wander when you’re doing mundane tasks that don’t require focus—like knitting or shelling peas–it may help you feel better or come up with creative ideas.
“The context and the content of your mind-wandering is actually really important. It plays a role in whether you get a good outcome or a not-so-good one,” she says.
Though many of us have a default mode that takes our mind to dark places when we aren’t busily engaged, that doesn’t mean we have to stay stuck there. If we can divert our thoughts from those darker places, we’ll likely get more out of mind-wandering.
Kam thinks practicing mindfulness could help with that, as long as it increases awareness of our thoughts and alerts us when we’ve strayed into problematic thinking, which could then help us redirect our mind-wandering.
“Just having more control over when mind-wandering happens and the kind of thoughts that you have would be very useful,” she says.
Zedelius also says awareness matters. As many study participants told her, they had never paid much attention to where their minds went before being in her study, but found the process eye-opening.
“They would say, ‘I’ve become aware of patterns in my thoughts that I never noticed before—what I get drawn to,’” she says. “It makes me wonder if the repeated probing we do in our experiments could not just be used as a measure, but as a type of intervention, to see if awareness changes over time.”
Of course, even though daydreaming may be good for us, it gets a pretty bad rap in American culture. Americans tend to pride themselves on their strong work ethic—often translated as working hard for long hours with complete focus.
But people are not built to be “on” all of the time. Taking a mind-wandering break might be good not just for our creativity and happiness, but also for our productivity, especially if we are in jobs requiring focused attention that is draining to maintain. And, as long as it’s employed during times when complete focus isn’t required, it may improve our well-being without hampering performance.
We shouldn’t need an excuse to mind-wander, given that it’s part of our human inheritance. Besides, we’ve hardly begun to recognize what it can do for us, says Zedelius.
“My hope is that people will explore the limits of mind-wandering a bit more and try to mind-wander in a way that is bigger, more fantastical, more personally meaningful, and further into the future,” she says. “If people just really allowed themselves to playfully use this tool, they might be able to focus on creative solutions to big problems.”

HOW ABOUT A LITTLE MIND WANDERING
Psssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssst:
Dressing up or down
is optional
but the benefits
are
UNlimITEd
and
COUNTless
PERSPECTIVE
The Luckiest
My parents would have celebrated
their 69th Wedding anniversary
TODAY
June 7, 2021
I believe they still do
because that
“till death do us part”
never really separates. . .
Tomorrow
June 8, 2021
Erin and I are celebrating our
35th Wedding Anniversary.
On June 8, 1986
the odds makers gave us a 35% chance of surviving our second marriage
which blended two families together
and it even went down a few percentage points when we had
o u r
two children within the first four years of our marriage.
T O D A Y:
the odds makers are ruling in our favor.
T H E Y
say
77% of couples married since 1990 reached their 10-year anniversaries according to recent census figures. It’s a supposed slight increase from 74% in the 80’s when divorces were at an all-time high.
N O W
Fifty-Five percent of all married couples have been married for at least 15 years, according to the Census report, while 35 percent have celebrated their 25th anniversaries and a special
S I X P E R C E N T
have made it to 50 years.
The Social Scientists are giving us all kinds of reasons why couples have not only leveled off the divorce train but actually turned it around:
Better Communication
More Equal Rights and Pay
Being Friends First
Compatibility
Financial Stability
Bradford Wilcox, the Director of the National Marriage Project at the University of Virginia tells us,
“Marriage is actually becoming more stable in America and divorce is becoming less common.”
He goes on to say,
“There is sort of more of a soul mate model of marriage today. . .50 years ago, this was one of the things you did when you became a young adult. You found a boyfriend or girlfriend and if you were pretty happy you’d go ahead and get married. . .Today the bar for marriage is much higher because people want a soul mate, not just a spouse. And a soul mate should be someone who is capable of providing you with emotional fulfillment, an intense relationship.”
What do I know after 35 years?
I know
that I can give the World, but Erin can bring me home.
I know
that we can show each other what we can never see by ourselves
I know
that she’s a beautiful blue ocean and I’m an extensive sandy shore
I know
that her Better
conquers my Worse
I know
that her Richness
obliterates my Poverty
I know
her Health
cures my Illnesses
I know
her Love is my never ending Christmas Day
I most ultimately know
I’m not
the strongest,
the bravest,
the smartest,
the brightest,
the thinnest,
the fastest,
the surest,
the most handsome
but no one can ever convince me
that I’m not the
l u c k i e s t
The one thing after all of these years
I absolutely-for-the-life-of-me-cannot-figure-out:
Why she said
Y E S
but I’m in heaven now and forevermore
because she
did. . .
Great relationships aren’t the ones that last a lifetime,
they’re ones that last a second past eternity.
I don’t know what the percentages of
T H A T
a r e. . .
but when you have it. . .
you no longer care;
It’s a Math
you can’t figure out
but adds up
a n y w a y
(and we just can’t stop smiling)
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