The Caring Catalyst

Who Cares - What Matters

JUST A MOMENT: WE ARE A CONSTRUCTION ZONE

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PSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSST:

It’ doesn’t matter where you live or where you’re going to or where you’ve been; it seems like you can’t go anywhere today without seeing the UNDER CONSTRUCTION sign in all bold capital letters and if it’s not a building or a new establishment, then it’s certainly the roads or the ways that we travel to get to those places that we call HOME.

What about you? is there a sign UNDER CONSTRUCTION  that should be at least placed on your lapel or maybe worn around your neck or how about just have printed on your forehead because in one way or the other, it’s true, isn’t it: WE ARE ALL UNDER CONSTRUCTION!
Ww are never finished products. We’re never completed projects.  There’s always a little bit of this or a little bit of that that we want to  add or update or refurbish.  So, what about you? What is it in you that needs refurbishing, that needs updated, that maybe needs dilapidated or demolished and raised up all over again in a  brand new way?
If you could choose that, which way would your arrow point?  We don’t have to be asked the question or know the answer.       .       .
IN JUST A MOMENT, right now and quick.           .            .You know exactly why you’re watching this video and the answers to the questions that have made you wonder about the Construction you are under

A LETTER TO YOUR HIGH SCHOOL SELF

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IT IS GRADUATION SEASON.                .             .Yesterday, I had two granddaughters graduate from High School; unfortunately, one was in Wheeling, WV and the other here at the Stocker Center at LCCC in Elyria.  Erin and I split up as she attended Stella’s in Elyria and I headed to Wheeling for Ava’s.  Both of them made me think a little deeper as I have now graduated three separate times, watched my children graduate and now my granddaughters (with four more looming graduations in the future) all of which that got me thinking about their future and ours, a future, not even on our best days, we can predict.

The word commencement is derived from the French and was first used to refer to graduation in the 14th century.  (Uhhh, yeah, back when I was in school…SMILE).  It makes me think of a pediatric social worker who once told me, “Children love to anticipate.  They need something every day to look forward to in the short term and the long term.”  And I thought, “Gee, I like that idea as an adult.”  During these last 45 +years of ministry I’ve tried to make it my business to assure our folks that something good and exciting and needed is going to happen on a regular basis.  Do they feel it’s right and normal to graduate from old ideas and commence with new ones that help us grow and serve each other better?  It’s the season, so I wish all of you a happy commencement.

With Proms mostly over and High School Graduations very much on the the horizon, somehow this song, these words seem very appropriate.          .         .

Letter To My High School Self (Be Kind) By JJ Heller, David Heller, and Ginny Owens

I’m writing you this letter ‘Cause I’ve walked in your shoes I hope that you will read this When you’re feeling confused

The hardest part of high school Is living in between The person you’re becoming And the kid you used to be

Dizzy from highs and lows You can’t see which way to go I’ve been there too Here’s what you do

Be kind Be strong Believe You belong Love God Work hard Just be who you are

You want to feel important But don’t be fooled by fame ‘Cause everyone who loves you Already knows your name

And when you have a house someday There won’t be trophies on display There’s so much more Worth living for

Be kind Be strong Believe You belong Love God Work hard Just be who you are

Let go of the last times Celebrate the first times And keep your heart wide open

Be kind Be strong Believe You belong Forgive Yourself Don’t be afraid to ask for help Love God Work hard Just be who you are.     .      .
AND JUST WHAT WOULD YOU WRITE TO YOUR HIGH SCHOOL SELF
Psssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssst.     .     .
THAT HIGH SCHOOL SELF
IS STILL HERE
Hopefully
L I S T E N I N G
L E A R N I N G
L O V I N G
(always loving, hoping for a little love in return and finding, having, keeping it)

Seeking yoyu 余裕

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W            A            I            T
W           H           A            T.                     .                  .

Seth Godin has been writing a daily blog for years on end and he usually turns them into some interesting books.  The thing I like about his blog and really try to emulate, especially on Wednesday’s with my LIVE, JUST A MOMENT couple of minute posts, is to catch your short attention span and compete all that verses it.  Here is one of those quick-to-read-thought-provoking posts of Seth’s that made more question marks and “Hmmmmmmmmmm’s” popped up for me and now maybe for you:

Seeking yoyu 余裕

There are two ways of thinking about doing more than is necessary.

It can become a really useful marketing tactic. When you deliver more than people expect, your overdelivery creates connection. The surprise and delight is remarkable. People talk about it, seek you out and come back for more.

Of course, since it’s a useful tactic, you’re not actually doing more than is necessary. You’re doing the right amount.

The other sort is magical. It’s difficult, ridiculous and offers no obvious commercial benefit.

This sort of effort isn’t always noticed or appreciated by the customer, but that’s okay. It’s the calm, proud and professional approach that serves the maker, regardless of whether it’s worth it to the consumer.

It’s difficult to care enough to do more than is necessary if you are on the assembly line, hustling to make the quarterly numbers or being measured for every keystroke.

Finding the space to care an unreasonable amount is cultural and it often requires a system to nurture that sort of effort. We need room to spare. We need to stop being in such a hurry and focus on the work and the art in a way that’s generative, not frazzled.

The Japanese term for this is yoyu. 余裕 is effort and ease, time and passion.

The characters 余 (yo) means “surplus” or “extra,” and 裕 (yu) means “abundance” or “affluence.”

Yoyu has several interconnected meanings:

  • Having spare time or room
  • Being relaxed or composed
  • Having financial leeway or resources to spare
  • Mental/emotional capacity to handle situations calmly

Yoyu produces its own reward.

In a competitive market, it’s easy to see how we slide down the slippery slope of efficiency. The boss usually doesn’t often embrace yoyu, seeking easily measured productivity instead. Make the assembly line a bit faster, change the intensity of the lighting, give out a few bonuses or fire some people.

And scale isn’t the friend of yoyu. If use our resources to expand and amplify, we’ve taken them away from our daily craft. If the project gets bigger when you have slack, slack disappears. Stress arrives.

So why bother?

We’re not machines, or even cogs in a machine. When we are at our best, we’re fully human. Human as producers and as consumers as well.

What’s the point of rushing if we never get anywhere?

JUST A MOMENT: MORE THAN WHAT YOU LOOK AT

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The flaw exists in each of us, sometimes more brutal than at other times, but it does exist:  WE DON’T ALWAYS RECOGNIZE WHAT WE NOTICE.            .              . Even if it’s something beautiful; even if it elicits, “Ohhhhhhh’s and Ahhhhhhhhhhhh’s,” from us.  There are times we don’t still see the full picture.  It’s as if, even though we’re looking at the puzzle, the box in which it came, doesn’t fully let us comprehend how the final piece will complete the picture that’s on the box (because it’s the wrong box picture)

anonymous person with binoculars looking through stacked books

Photo by Andrea Piacquadio on Pexels.com

Maybe that’s when we really see what we recognize and notice with the distinct possibility of sharing, so that others can have the same experience.              .               .in just a moment

LOOK AGAIN
.            .            .what you
REALLY SEE
just might surprise you and more,
CHANGE YOU
in just a moment

NOT JUST ANOTHER JOB

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Your Favorite Quote?

Behind all of your stories is always your mother’s story, because hers is where yours begin–Mitch Albom.

My mother was the most beautiful woman I ever saw.  All I am I owe to my mother.  I attribute my success in life to the moral, intellectual and physical education I received from her–George Washington.

Motherhood is the one job where, the better you are, the more surely you won’t be needed in the long run–Barbara Kingsolver

How vital are mother’s influence and teaching in the home–how apparent when neglected–Ezra Taft Benson.

Mothers worry only a out those we brought into this world, regardless of whether they loved us back or treated us fairly or understood our shortcomings–Adriana Trigiani

No language can express the power, and the beauty, and heroism, and majesty of a mother’s love. It shrinks not where man cowers, and grows stronger where man faints, and over wastes of worldly fortunes sends the radiance of a quenchless fidelity like a star.–Edwin Hubbell Chapin

Mom–the person most likely to write an autobiography and never mention herself–Robert Brault

I, like the rest of the world, had a wonderful day of celebrating Mother’s Day.

It was the fifth Mother’s Day
without my mom
but the days were filled with memories of great times with her

Even without seeing all of my four daughters,
Each who are most awesome mom’s
that make the proudest and happiest of
Pappy’s
We were still able to celebrate with them
without being with them

I had many prideful moments watching the reaction of Erin as the kids expressed thanks for being their
M  O  M
throughout the day.

 I know that she in fact,

is not my mother,

but I could have never been more blessed than her being the mom and stepmom to my children.

It really is more than just a job, isn’t it?

I can’t imagine too many more jobs more

 t  h  a  n  k  L  E  S  S

Truly, it’s one of fewest jobs anyone would ever  apply,

accept or keep.        .        .

and yet, there are well over a billion that hold the actual gut-wretching-never-ending position of

M        O        M

.    .    .to   THAT   there are only two words,

never said enough days before,

Day of,

or days after :

THANK    YOU

About that favorite quote. . .

it’s most likely the one that the heart shouts and the mouth can’t begin the whisper. .  .

the pen can never put to paper.

GO HUG A MOM.     .     .

AND IF YOU CAN’T—

HUG   A   CHILD   OF   ONE

—hard and just a little longer than usual.        .        .

J  u  s  t      b  e  c  a  u  s  e !

Happy     Day     After     Mother’s     Day!

(Make it just as important)

YOUR CORE(NESS)

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Wait.            .             .What.                   .                .isn’t this everyone’s goal, 
EVEN WHEN IT’S NOT NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTION MAKING EVE.                .               .

Well, maybe New Year’s Day just doesn’t happen on January 1, maybe it happens when you go to the doctor for your yearly physical and you get get pushed, poked, prodded and oh yes, the can’t-lie-your-way-out-of-it- blood test.

For the most part I am in ‘GOOD SHAPE’ (for the shape I’m in) the A1C was just slightly elevated and I got the, “Cut out sugar, carbs, junk.  Eat more vegetables, fruit and EXERCISE, EXERCISE, EXERCISE     M   O   R   E

Well, I did what I usually do before New Year’s Day, I started to RESOLUTION before the RESOLUTION and began exercising before getting the missive but.            .            .can your CORE ever be more CORED UP?

I recently read an article from a colleague from National Speakers Association, Lou Heckler who suggested a different kind of CORE TRAINING.  Even though I’m now doing sets of planks, push up’s and walking and need to do more, more consistently, I started thinking about this different kind of CORE TRAINING that doesn’t involve sit-ups or planking, push up’s or walking up stairs.  It’s more about principles and beliefs and practices and how it sometimes feels difficult to stay true to the person you believe you are.

We see lots of people taking what are called “shortcuts” when we really mean “cheating.”  We see work that is “unfinished” when we really mean “unacceptable.”  Do you sometimes ask yourself, “Why am I striving so hard to be good and kind and generous when I see others seeming to get ahead by doing the opposite?”

Spoiler alert here:  They are NOT getting ahead.  Those temporary gains will not last and neither will their contributions to the world at large.  My “core exercises” go like this:  Be loving.       .       .give more than asked; promise the World and deliver the Universe.     .     .look for laughter and joy every day; if you find or make a Smile, bring one (your’s).         .        .help the people who are struggling; just because someone has a hand doesn’t mean that couldn’t use your’s.            .            .be grateful; don’t list the things you’re thankful for, live them.          .          .

Like any workout, it takes a daily commitment, doesn’t it?  I hope you get your reps in this week.            .           .

Pssssssssssssssssssssst: YOUR HEART WILL THANK YOU FOR IT.   .   .AND SO WILL SOMEONE ELSE’S!

 

JUST A MOMENT: THE REALNESS OF FAKE

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It really is getting harder and harder every day. In fact, you don’t have to go to a florist or try to seek out the best arrangement. It’s getting more difficult every day to find the difference between what is fake and what is real.  I mean seriously, there are some people that are actually planting fake flowers in their gardens so they’ll always be color in their yards 365 days of Year.

How does the fakedness of those flowers make them any more real just because they show up every day in vivid living color?  Well, I guess that’s the truest test of all and yes, and we come know it in just a moment literally and so philosophically in every other way.

So.          .         .is the artificial in you more fake or more real and what are you trying to make it or understand it or show it

IN JUST A MOMENT.      .      .       ?

WHERE THE SIDEWALK ENDS

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CHILDREN KNOW THE PLACE

WHERE THE SIDEWALK ENDS
Shel Silverstein

There is a place where the sidewalk ends
And before the street begins,
And there the grass grows soft and white,
And there the sun burns crimson bright,
And there the moon-bird rests from his flight
To cool in the peppermint wind.

Let us leave this place where the smoke blows black
And the dark street winds and bends,
Past the pits where the asphalt flowers grow
We shall walk with a walk that is measured and slow,
And watch where the chalk-white arrows go
To the place where the sidewalk ends.

Yes we'll walk with a walk that is measured and slow,
And we'll go where the chalk-white arrows go,
For the children, they mark, and the children, they know
The place where the sidewalk ends.


(from Where the Sidewalk Ends)

(My thanks to the poet and the producers of the video, via Shamis.)
Sometimes becoming a kid again
(or at least a little more CHILD-LIKE)
is just a poem away.          .          .

 

 

A COUPLE OF FRIENDS

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Henri Nouwen & Fred Rogers were friends, writing back & forth to one another over the years. Finding this out was such a joy for me, particularly given my love and appreciation for both men and their work.

At one point, Fred sent Henri a particularly discouraging article that had been written about him and the ministry that Fred had with young children. Words like these, attacking Fred’s character and questioning his intentions, were deeply wounding to him, and given the propensity of his friend, Henri, to speak openly of human pain, suffering, and healing, I can only imagine that it would be have been altogether natural to seek comfort from him.

This is a part of Henri’s reply.
“I read the article you sent me and can very well understand how much that must have hurt you. It must be really painful to be confronted with a total misunderstanding of your mission and your spiritual intentions.

It is these little persecutions within the church that hurt the most. I simply hope that you are not too surprised by them. They come and will keep coming precisely when you do something significant for the Kingdom. It has always struck me that the real pain comes often from the people from whom we expected real support. It was Jesus’ experience and the experience of all the great visionaries in the Church, and it continues to be the experience of many who are committed to Jesus.

I don’t think it makes much sense to argue with the writer of this article. He speaks from a very different plane and will not be open to your explanations. Some of the criticisms we simply have to suffer and see as invitations to enter deeper into the heart of Jesus. I won’t send you some of the reviews I get of my books, but some are not very different from the tone of this piece. So I certainly feel a unique solidarity with you.

Let us pray for each other, that we remain faithful and not become bitter and that we continue to return to the center where we can find the joy and peace that is not of this world.”

It’s beyond tough to be misunderstood or wrongfully attacked, but for what it’s worth I have always found when deeply wounded, especially by those you’d least expect it, the best words I’ve found the courage to share are NO WORDS AT ALL.    .     .and for one literally talks in his sleep, well.     .     .there’s no words for that either.          .          .          .

SO IF IT’S EASIER SAID THAN DONE.       .        .MAKE IT HARDER TO SAY AND EASIER TO DO (KINDNESS)
.            .           .YOU’LL NEVER BE MISQUOTED!

JUST A MOMENT: WALK THE LINE

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We usually have no problems whatsoever walking the line if it happens to be a 4 inch line on the ground, BUT  a 1 inch wide tight rope thin line 160 feet above Niagara Falls, well.        .      .we still have no trouble volunteering to walk that line or riding that line in a wheelbarrow.  In fact, I’ll be the first one to VOLUNTEER YOU or SOMEONE ELSE to walk that line and others that might bring me danger, even if it means going from one significant point to another important place one treacherous step at a time.

Can you walk that line?

Or do you volunteer me or somebody else, too?

Professional Speaker, Author, Assurance Man