DEATH
has a Waiting Room
that invites Everyone
but no one wants
to sit
The TV is broken
The magazines are out of date
The chairs are uncomfortable
The coffee is bad
The rattling water cooler
never refreshes
The Clientele
too familiar and annoying
with their hacking
incessantly loud obnoxious yawnings
and an occasional party noise
You’re not sure that comes from
a person or the faux vinyl seat
you never intended to quite fit
It’s a room with poor ventilation
The carpet is worn
but not faded
stubbornly holding onto its colors
and a scent that can’t quite be
identified or replicated
There’s the dim light
that can never be squinted Brighter
All this
and just like that
You’re no longer there
–noticed–
Even before your name is mispronounced
to come forth
DEATH
is a finish line
We all run from
to only find out
at the End
we’ve all madly sprinted
Our Way Towards
(c o n t i n u o s l y)
D U G N A D
D U G N A D
Say it with me:
dugnad (doog-nod). . .
It’s a Norwegian word I learned this week when I was reading an article by Phyllis Cole-Dai; it’s an ancient word, traceable to the Viking Age, when villagers would labor together to bring ships ashore after long seafaring trips.
That’s dognap. . .
In later centuries, Norwegian farming communities would work together to prepare for harsh winters and to survive other hardships.
Dugnad. . .
In the 1940s, Norwegians rallied to resist five brutal years of Nazi occupation.
Dugnad. . .
Traditionally, dugnad is the collective effort of individual Norwegians who sacrifice their personal desires, and allow their own sense of “normal” to be temporarily disrupted, for the benefit of their community or country.
On March 12 of this year, after the first Norwegian died from COVID-19, Prime Minister Erna Solberg called for a national dugnad. She asked everyone in Norway to band together to reduce the spread of the disease. As a result, the country contained the outbreak, avoiding massive numbers of infections and deaths.
To my knowledge, I don’t have any Norwegians in my family tree. But a concept similar to dugnad lives in my, in OUR DNA. I call it “love of the neighbor,” or “commitment to the common good,” or “civic duty,” or even “patriotism,” in the best sense.
I know. . .one person’s definition and perspective isn’t the COLLECTIVE’S and I’m often hurt and disappointed when I’m naive enough to think so. . .
I credit my upbringing, my spiritual life, and my liberal arts education, my Master of Divinity in Social Ethics and Pastoral Care among other things, for cultivating in me a deep respect for others. But I suspect that I was born with the seed of this sensibility, just as you were. It’s part of our nature as human beings. How could it not be? We’ve had to count on one another to survive since the dawn of history.
Sometimes, though, that seed of US gets buried so far down inside, we don’t even realize it’s there. We lack fellow feeling. We’d rather do our own thing than devote ourselves to a common purpose, even in a crisis. . .and isn’t that what we are currently seeing/showing/feeling over these past few months. . . ?
I keep hoping that we can find ways to strengthen our faith in one another. Maybe we could start, right where we are, by sharing frankly what we believe in—one person speaking at a time, while the rest of us listen. I mean, really listen, without mentally picking apart what we’re hearing. Listening so well that when the speaker finishes, we offer only our thanks, without commentary. We now understand better, and that’s enough.
Let’s try it, shall we?
DARE WE?
I’ll speak first, if you don’t mind, since I’m already at it:
I believe in greeting each new day with a bow of gratitude. In nurturing the promise of children. In being faithful to friends. In being kind to strangers. In trying to love without clinging.
I believe in neighborly potlucks and pots of coffee. In bicycles and flowers and porches; early morning walks or afternoon strolls in silence and solitude. In sanctuaries and wilderness. In letting things be. In sometimes losing myself in order to find myself again. In the necessity of pulling colorful weeds out of sidewalk cracks in the delight of UNPLANTING flowers or just buying them and giving them away. In striking a fine balance between freedom and responsibility. In the power of naming. In the duty to vote. In buying a cup of coffee for the car behind you in line and driving away before they have a chance to flick their lights or honk their horn in gratitude. . .
I believe that the universe is big and our place in it isn’t even a speck, yet what we do and say matters. I believe that joy is fleeting. That life is hard. That equanimity is possible, even in the midst of suffering. That life is a fragile web of kinship. That death is always close. I believe in the smallness of what I know, the value of what you know, the vastness of what we can know together, and the existence of what we can’t know at all. . .
I believe in trees, especially old ones, and in the ever-changing sky, which has no borders, only ongoing, never-ending horizons. I believe that what’s good for me is bound up with what’s good for you. I believe in stepping over the line of what’s nice for the sake of what’s right. I believe in poetry and stories and music and art and dreams—everything that helps us to question who we are and to imagine who we might become, together. . .
I believe in you. . .
D U G N A D
I am often the weakest link
to find the strongest of strong
connections
that hold and support me
when I have fingerless hands
to grab
to hold
anything that’s good
for me and others
Seldom the strongest
frequently the weakest
the mainest of the main
is being a part of the chain
Often am I
the thread missing from the tapestry
the puzzled piece
that completes the jigsawed riddle
the punctuation mark
that ends the sentence
the dot that connects the dots
and in the missing
am I forever found
to be often lost
and found again
and yet found once before
being lost
A connection
A link
not deserved
but owned
all the more
to be extended
to the
dugnad
in you
THIS SIMPLE. . . ?
BE THE OUTSTRETCHED HAND
THAT GUARANTEES ANOTHER’S
NEVER TO BE EMPTY
. . .THAT COMPLETES THE NEVER-ENDING CIRCLE
HAND IN HAND
LINK BY LINK
HELP ME
IN MY WEAKNESS
IN YOUR WEAKNESS
TO MAKE STRONG
WHAT CAN NEVER BE ACCOMPLISHED
a l o n e
THE WAY
Q U E S T I O N:
ARE YOU ON YOUR WAY. . . ?
A N S W E R:
ARE YOU EVER NOT. . . ?
The movie came out in 2010 but it keeps replaying the inspiration it might not have fully imagined having. . .
Erin and I watched it early in January before COVID19 made movie watching a part of the new, NEW
Martin Sheen plays Tom, an American doctor who comes to St. Jean Pied de Port, France to collect the remains of his adult son, killed in the Pyrenees in a storm while walking The Camino de Santiago, also known as The Way of Saint James. Driven by his profound sadness and desire to understand his son better, Tom decides to embark on the historical pilgrimage, leaving his “California bubble life” behind. Armed with his son’s backpack and guidebook, Tom navigates the 800 km pilgrimage from the French Pyrenees, to Santiago de Compostela in the north west of Spain, but soon discovers that he will not be alone on this journey. While walking The Camino, Tom meets other pilgrims from around the world, all broken and looking for greater meaning in their lives: a Dutchman (Yorick van Wageningen) a Canadian (Deborah Kara Unger) and an Irish writer (James Nesbitt) who is suffering from a bout of “writer’s block.” From the hardship experienced along “The Way” this unlikely quartet of misfits create an everlasting bond and Tom begins to learn what it means to be a citizen of the world again, and discovers the difference between “The life we live and the life we choose”. THE WAY was filmed entirely in Spain and France along the actual Camino de Santiago. . .
All of the
detours
roadblocks
deadends
Along The Way
there is A WAY for all of us
where the strands of our tapestry
intermingle and forever become interwoven
in the Tapestry’s of others
making sure that we’ll only
grow and expand
and never fully unravel
with the ever unfolding
TRUTH:
YOU DON’T CHOOSE A LIFE—-
YOU LIVE ONE
and that’s
THE WAY
which finds us all on the same
P A T H
at different places
but the
Same Path a long The Way
just assuredly just the same
which makes any
SEE YOU LATER
more of a certainty
than any random bet. . .
G A R D E N
ARE YOU GROWING. . .
ARE YOU PLANTING. . .
or maybe the better questions are these:
The Gardener
by Mary Oliver
Have I lived enough?
Have I loved enough?
Have I considered Right Action enough, have I come to any conclusion?
Have I experienced happiness with sufficient gratitude?
Have I endured loneliness with grace?
I say this, or perhaps I’m just thinking it.
Actually, I probably think too much.
Then I step out into the garden,
where the gardener, who is said to be a simple man, is tending his children, the roses.
This always brings me back to my rocky bareness
as my pen spits out some of its
i n k i e s t
words:
Toiled
Tilled
Watered
Nurtured
Sunned
Blessed
with no sprouting
no harvest
and then
a mere scattering of seeds
and barren it was
no more
The Truth. . .
not all Sunshine
comes from the sky. . .
not all plants,
from the ground
and that
will get you a pair of
dirty
p r a y i n g
gardener’s hands
every time
. . .close your eyes
bow your head
pray the
wordless prayer
every Heart shouts
and no mouth
w h i s p e r s
. . .sow that
(and seeds will no longer be necessary)
OLD JESUS
I saw an old Jesus
Walking through
A crowded waiting room
In a place
no one wanted to be
He Shuffle passed me
In faded, wrinkled pajama bottoms
And a lifeless gray T-shirt
Sipping on a stained Styrofoam
cup of coffee
He floated to a pause
In awe of the brightly colored fish
Swimming around a shiny but finger smudged aquarium
And they seemed to multiply
Wildly in a flurry of surreal color
that eyes could barely focus
and imaginations dare to envision
A Hand Out
became a Life Raft
My ice water took on a different taste of Merlot
that left a warm glow which seemed to illuminate within me
An ember that glowed
warmed
without incinerating
With a mere ever so light touch of his fingertips
Or a soft gaze of his eyes
One by one we were
metamorphosized
And then in a much
quicker than the blink of an eye
and way less subtle than the distinct note
from a shiny trumpet
There was a suddenness
Of difference
I not only forgot why I was there
I was in fact
No longer there
YOUR HEART
Have you ever lost your heart. . . ?
Loaded question, huh?
Well?
What makes it such a touch question
is just trying to figure out
is that a
Physical
Emotional
Psycho-Social
Spiritual
L I T E R A L Question. . .
Ohhhhhhhh how you should know by
NOW
and all nearly some 800 Blog Posts later
that I’m a Sucker for the Sap Movies
and this one,
LAST CHRISTMAS
is maybe the sappiest of all
and it’s leaked a glue over me
that I can’t wash away
(and most likely don’t want to, anyway)
Nothing seems to go right for young Kate, a frustrated Londoner who works as an elf in a year-round Christmas shop. But things soon take a turn for the better when she meets Tom — a handsome charmer who seems too good to be true. As the city transforms into the most wonderful time of the year, Tom and Kate’s growing attraction turns into the best gift of all — a Yuletide romance. . .
Sa-Sa-Saaaaaa-SAPPY, right?
ba-ba-baaa-but
it made me think
IT MADE ME FEEL
the times I’ve lost my
h e a r t
Uhhhhhhh not so much
physically
emotionally
psycho-socially
spiritually
so much as
uh-ohh. . .
dare I write:
metaphysically. . .
and I guess I’m inviting you
to ask
to reflect
a time(S)
you’ve actually lost your heart. . . ?
Can I help answer?
Are you the same you were
10
20
30+
years ago?
What changed from the time you were an infant
to the time you became a toddler
to the time you became a preschooler
to the time you were in elementary school
to the time you were in junior high
to the time you were graduating high school
to the times of different jobs
to the the times of continuing education
to the times of getting married
to the times of having children
to
N O W
. . .just how many,
HOW MANY TIMES HAVE YOU LOST YOUR HEART
and maybe better still. . .
FOUND IT?
Psssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssst:
Here’s to all of the times to come
and all the Seasons
that’ll allow
the prompting of the question:
WHO AM I?
(MAY THE ANSWER CONTINUALLY BE DIFFERENT
as it has countless times before)
EXTREME VERKLEMPTNESS
The COVID-19 Pandemic
has brought many different changes
to the entire world
and out of all of the signs and symptoms
that have been identified in actually having this dreaded virus
I’m not so sure that
EXTREME VERKLEMPTNESS
isn’t one of the
unidentified
unspoken
o n e s. . .
On July 12, Kelly Preston
the Co-star in
FOR THE LOVE OF THE GAME
died
after a courageous two year battle of breast cancer. . .
In 1999 she joined Kevin Costner
in making this movie
. . .NO, NO,
it wasn’t up for any awards or honors
and it might have long been forgotten by this time
if she hadn’t recently died and it started being shown again on
HBO and other cable outlets
to honor her;
the premise of the film
is kind of flimsy
in that Kevin Costner’s character of
Billy Chapel
a so-so pitcher
throws the game of his life,
A No-Hitter
against the famed Yankees
fulfilling his
FOR THE LOVE OF THE GAME
legacy
and what should have been the greatest night of his life
w a s n ‘ t
because he painfully discovered
it wasn’t a
game
therapy
intervention
pharmaceutical
scientific discovery
medical advancement
B U T
RELATIONSHIPS THAT HEAL US
. . .hence,
EXTREME VERKLEMPTNESS
which begs the
simple
somewhat evasive question of the Soul:
What’s a celebration with no one to share it?
Well. . . ?
What puts the tear in your eye
and more,
WHO HELPS DRY IT?
BEMOANERS
Let’s face it,
We don’t Bemoan
We don’t Lament
We don’t Rue
. . .We REGRET
A LOT
and any time we have a close call
or spend a few months in a
FIRST TIME DEBILITATING PANDEMIC
we begin to do a lot of things that often
whittle down to some good
honest to God
honest to Self
figuring out
life review
which is one of the biggest reasons
WE REGRET
There was no mention of more sex or bungee jumps. A palliative nurse who has counselled the dying in their last days has revealed the most common regrets we have at the end of our lives. And among the top, from men in particular, is ‘I wish I hadn’t worked so hard’.
Bronnie Ware is an Australian nurse who spent several years working in palliative care, caring for patients in the last 12 weeks of their lives. She recorded their dying epiphanies in a blog called Inspiration and Chai, which gathered so much attention that she put her observations into a book called The Top Five Regrets of the Dying.
Here are the top five regrets of the dying, as witnessed by Ware:
1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
“This was the most common regret of all. When people realise that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made. Health brings a freedom very few realise, until they no longer have it.”
2. I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.
“This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship. Women also spoke of this regret, but as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.”
3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.
“Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.”
4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
“Often they would not truly realise the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.”
5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.
“This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realise until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called ‘comfort’ of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content, when deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again.”
I am always cautious to never minimize
or worse
take away someone’s regrets
(they are theirs and even somewhat sacred)
or worse to
“There, There, There,”
them away
but I always like balancing them out a little bit with:
WHAT ARE YOU MOST PROUD?
WHAT ARE YOUR BEST ACCOMPLISHMENTS?
WHAT PAGE OF YOUR BOOK WOULD YOU NEVER TEAR OUT?
WHAT MOMENTS ARE YOU GLAD YOU DUPLICATED?
WHAT BAD THING TURNED OUT TO BE A REALLY GOOD THING?
w h i c h
leads us to
maybe the most important question now
on this Wednesday, July 29 moment:
What’s your greatest regret so far, and what will you set out to achieve or change before you die?
Pssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssst:
N O W
is the time
forever keeping it from being a
r e g r e t
A surefire
BEMOAN BEGON
e l i x i r
. . .I’ll take a double-shot;
JOIN ME
WISHLESSNESS
W I S H L E S S N E S S
is a Buddhist term
that kind of means
Y O U
don’t have to have something in front of you
to run after
IT’S ALEADY HERE
. . .Just walk your Path
Which took me down the tracks
t o:
The Carrot doesn’t need to be dangled
The Road doesn’t need to be traveled
The Gold doesn’t need to be mined
The Silver doesn’t need to be refined
The Prize doesn’t need to be won
The Treasure doesn’t need to be unearthed
Enter into the rarely journeyed
newly undiscovered World of
Wishlessness
to experience the uncharted
n o w
and find it’s not just an Everything
but an ALL
that needs no
replacing
enhancing
Psssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssst:
r u n
t o
t h a t
and know
- « Previous Page
- 1
- …
- 37
- 38
- 39
- 40
- 41
- …
- 44
- Next Page »