The Caring Catalyst

Hope, Faith, and Love

September 17, 2014 By ChuckBehrens Leave a Comment

How good of a NOTICE-ER are you?

Do you believe in Coincidence or are you more of an Einstein believer of, “Coincidence is God’s way of remaining Anonymous?”

I’ve always had a fairly sharp eye for what’s happening around me. I still think I MISS much more than I notice, but a willingness to SEE, HEAR, TASTE, TOUCH, SMELL more goes a very long way in actually seeing, hearing, tasting, touching, and smelling so much more than purposely not doing so.

Everyone wears NAME TAGS these day.

EVERYONE. . .EVERYWHERE.

I saw her’s at CVS as I was checking out. Her name was HOPE.

“I like your name, do you?” I asked her.

She smiled and said it was ok.

I asked her if anyone ever made fun of it and she told me more than she’d like, but was pretty much use to it.

I thanked her for taking care of me so nicely and said, “No pun intended, but I ‘HOPE’ your name serves you well and others more than you’ll ever understand or imagine.”

She smiled at back at me and already began checking out the good of the person behind me.

I NOTICED. . .

Later that day I was picking up some copied mps/cd’s from a camera shop and person who had called me on the phone to let me know that my order was ready, she identified herself as, Faith.

I had a little “Hmmmmmmmmmmm of the Day,” moment.

When I met her, I asked her about her name just like I had done with Hope. She told me that it was an aunt’s name who had died before she had been born.

I asked her if she liked her name and she smiled and shrugged her shoulders a little and giggled out a, “It’s alright, I guess.”

“Well, Faith,” I said, “I hope your name serves you and others well–just like it did me today.”

Her smile served as her only response.

I NOTICED. . .

It was my last visit of the day.

She was sitting with her back to me and her husband was lying in bed.

From the doorway, I could see he was half sleeping and half awake, moaning softly.

He blinked opened his eyes repeatedly, tried to clear his throat and then with a raspy whisper he said, “Hey Love, can you give me sip of water?”

“Ahhhh, thank you, Love, thank you,” he sighed as he was already back into a not so restless slumber.

“What a great name,” I said as I pulled up a chair beside her on the side of his bed.

She looked at me with moist, tired, red eyes.

“Oh that’s not my name, it’s Gloria, but he’s called me that since our second date 48 years ago.”

“It seems to fit,” I told her as we sat silently watching her husband breathe with a little rattle.

He mumbled, “Love. . .Love. . .Love. . . .”

She put her hand over top of his and laid her head down on the side of his bed.

It was peaceful. . .it was Love-FILLED.

I NOTICED. . .

Coincidence or

meeting three women in three so very different places, God’s way of remaining Anonymous?

Are you a good Notice’er?

You really don’t have to be Einstein to N O T I C E

Hope. . .

Faith. . .

Love. . .

The Greatest of these is not just in the NOTICING, but BEING in the moments that make Life more than mere Consequences…and then,

SHARING THEM. . . .

Would You?

September 15, 2014 By ChuckBehrens Leave a Comment

Would you?

We play THOSE kind of games at parties or sometimes around a dining room table after dessert and during the second cup of coffee.

We ask, “WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF YOU FOUND OUT THAT YOU ONLY HAD SIX MONTHS TO LIVE?”

Travel?

Sell everything you have and make sure that others benefit from the proceeds?

Go on a mega vacation?

Go on a huge ‘GOOD-BYE TOUR?’

Take things into your own hands and commit suicide?

Fight it with exotic experimental interventions/drugs?

Forget it with all kinds of alcohol and recreational drugs?

Would you go public with it, like the Illinois TV Anchorman, Dave Benton?

Would you go through the litany of: WHY ME. . .HOW COME. . .WHAT FOR?

Would you believe in God, in the Great Forever?

Would you stop exercising and eat whatever you want?

Would you max out your credit cards?

Would you do something totally outrageously dangerous?

Would you go out and have as many illicit affairs as possible in a six month period?

Would you commit a crime or murder someone?

Would you retire or continue to work?

Would you tell everyone, no one or some Ones?

Would you live as you have always lived?

Would you try to get in touch with folks to make amends?

Would you. . . ?

What would you do if you knew you only had six months to live?

Pssssst: Who says you even have that much time left?

While you might indeed have more than six months to live, this

IS NOT

a Document that insures you have time to read it again or share it.

This is a powerful reminder, hopefully, to let you know:

6 Seconds
6 Minutes
6 Hours
6 Days
6 Weeks
6 Months
6 Years
60 Years. . .

it’s all but a blink of the eye.

The life you have left is a Gift!

Cherish it.

Enjoy it.

L I V E I T to the fullest, no interruptions, commercial breaks, exceptions or excuses.

Do what Matters

Now!

McBrought It

September 12, 2014 By ChuckBehrens Leave a Comment

I’m impatient.

That’s a huge McUnderstatement.

Would you like a McClassic Example?

So very crowded was the line inside of McDonald’s that I went back outside, got in my car and got in the drive-thru line.

It was also a dramatic illustration of just how competitive I am, even with myself. My personal-no-one-even-noticed-Game was to get in my car, go through the drive-thru, get my order, park my car and get back into McDonald’s and eat my sausage egg McMuffin without the last person in line inside the store getting their order.

Little did I know that there was another game about to take place. . .

One with a couple of Winners.

I first heard her voice when I came up to the speaker to place my order.

Before she ever asked me for my order, she asked me this:

“Good morning. Are you having a good day?”

I told her I was having an awesome day and asked her how she was doing?

She told me, “Most Excellent.”

“Now what can I get for you to make the day better,” she asked?

I placed my order and was a little intrigued to find who this Order-Taking Wizard was.

She was young, and had a smile on her face that filled the window.

She told me what I owed her and as I handed her the money, I told her I owed her much more than that.

“How is it that you are TAKING orders but GIVING so much more than what you could put in a bag?”

She laughed and said, “I’ve never heard it put THAT way before.”

I thanked her for making my morning and she thanked me for coming through her line and told me it was good to see me.

I gave her my standard reply to that comment: “IT’S BETTER TO BE SEEN THAN VIEWED”

She laughed and that when I said, “Hey, thanks for bringing it. . .you McBROGHT IT!”

She yelled as I drifted away, “Thanks, you McBrought it, too!”

I hurried and parked my car and went back into McDonald’s to read the papered news and eat my Sausage Egg McMuffin.

Oh yeah, I was smiling big because I had beaten the people who were still in line waiting for their orders.

I WON!

…and then, and then I realized, I ready had W O N. . . .

When was the last time Some One McBrought if for you?

When was the last time you McBrought if for Some One Else?

Let the Game begin. . .

McBring It!

W I N

Yesterday’s News, Tomorrow

September 10, 2014 By ChuckBehrens Leave a Comment

It’s almost been a month. . .

If you think that news travels fast, time makes you forget THAT news flies even faster, doesn’t it?

It’s been just about a month since Robin Williams died.

There’s been many stories written, many movies highlighted and seen, many once-upon-a time’s and remember-when’s reflected upon.

Care for one more?

I don’t think I’ll ever be able to hear the name of ROBIN WILLIAMS or see another one of his movies without thinking about this. . . .

The story goes that whenever Robin was to be hired or considered for a role he would submit a “RIDER.”

[Read more…]

A Fan or a Follower?

September 8, 2014 By ChuckBehrens Leave a Comment

I’ve been a life long Pittsburgh Steeler Fan.

Now it comes honestly. I’ve been living in Cleveland since 1987 and I don’t think I’ll live anywhere else because I love the area and what it offers so much.

But. . .

I was born in Wheeling, WV and grew up about thirty miles away in Washington, PA, about a half an hour from Pittsburgh.

As much as I love the Cav’s (especially with LaBron and his supporting cast in place) and am an avid Tribe supporter, The Steelers…well, I just can’t give them up.

However. . .

I’m not a Pittsburgh Steeler Fan, anymore. I’m certainly not a Baltimore Ravens Fan and no, sadly, I’m not a Browns fan either.

After seeing the video of Devon Still and his four-year old cancer-stricken daughter and hearing that in the midst of all of his troubles, he actually finds out that he didn’t make the final roster cut of the Cincinnati Bengals…but included him on the Team’s Practice Squad, how can you not at least have a little bit of support for THAT team?

THAT they signed him to a newly expanded Practice Squad…

THAT he will not be traveling a whole lot and be able to spend precious time with his daughter…

THAT he will receive $6300.00 a week for his salary for being on the Practice Squad…

THAT HE WILL BE ABLE TO HAVE INSURANCE FOR MUCH NEEDED MEDICAL CARE…

goes well beyond what football is, promises, or ever hopes to be, even with the ultimate winning of the Super Bowl or MVP Honors.

I’d like to think, just because the Browns lost to the Steelers on a last second Field Goal after coming back from a 27-3 half-time deficit, their home opener next week will still be a sell-out–not because of Fans…but faithful, die-hard FOLLOWERS!

FOLLOWERS who, regardless of wins/losses, last-second defeats or stupid-game-losing-mistakes, still believe, still support, still root, support, wear the T-shirt. . . .

Are you a Fan or a Follower?

It’s not often or often enough to be sure, but when I watch a video like the one above or hear of a TRUE LOVE STORY like Devon Still and his daughter, I become a much more Compassionate, Committed Follower; my heart beats a little more proudly; my eyes become watery; my faith a little more restored; my Hope–more secured.

Are you a Fan or a Follower?

Sometimes…just Some Times…

there’s a new song that just doesn’t need to be heard, or sung, but followed!

Let The Dance Begin…and never end. . .my fellow Followers!

A Most Difficult Practice

September 3, 2014 By ChuckBehrens Leave a Comment

We are reminded every once in a while, aren’t we?

And it’s a very painful reminder too, isn’t it?

WE DON’T KNOW E V E R Y T H I N G. . .

In fact, sometimes, we barely know, anything.

I think we are at our most dangerous when We KNOW,
When we know that We KNOW,
When we bet our lives WE KNOW
that we most likely have the ability to A C T like we KNOW NOTHING!

And do you know what we KNOW the very least about?

Death.

Wait, we do know that death occurs when the heart beats no longer, when brain waves are flat, when there’s an absence of pulse, when the lungs don’t inhale/exhale.

D E A T H

But. . .

We are not talking about Death

We are talking about YOUR DEATH!

I was in my second year of Seminary taking a Clinical Pastoral Education Class. Near the end of the Unit, after spending my time at the University of Kentucky Medical Center, my Supervisor asked me what I wanted to do with this training.

Hospice was a fairly new concept, but I was intrigued by death and dying and companioning those who are intimately walking that path.

I told my supervisor that I would like to possibly use my Clinical Education Class to do Hospice Chaplaincy.

I still remember his smile…it was a slow one that gently spread across his face, wrinkling his cheeks and squinting his eyes, showing his teeth.

He held it there in my gaze for just a few seconds, those few seconds that last an eternity in your mind.

He cleared his throat and asked me a question that I’ll never forget–now neither will you:

“WHAT ABOUT YOUR DEATH; HAVE YOU THOUGHT OF YOUR DEATH?”

And then with one simple statement, my life changed,

“YOU CAN’T HELP ANY ONE ELSE DIE, YOU CAN’T WALK THEM DOWN THAT PATH UNLESS YOU’VE DEALT WITH YOUR OWN DEATH.”

Good words then, great words, still. . . .

I’m going to die, so are you.

We know it.

We know we know it.

We’d bet our lives that we know it.

But, but for the life of us, we act like we just don’t know it.

So I practice. I practice dying a little each day. With each visit, each funeral, each ache, each pain, each disappointment, each hurt, each good-bye, ‘see-you-later, with each moment of perfect peace, each night, just before I go to sleep. . .

. . .and begin again each morning I wake up. . .

Until, until I don’t. . . .

This Is A Test

September 1, 2014 By ChuckBehrens Leave a Comment

Go ahead. . .

FILL IN THE

. . . .

Jingle-less Change

August 27, 2014 By ChuckBehrens Leave a Comment

Does Change jingle?

That’s the problem, isn’t it?

Most of the time when Change is imminent, it makes no sound…

IT JUST HAPPENS!

The worst kind of Change there is the kind that is Jingle-less.

She just graduated from high-school three months ago and now it time for her next step into another phase.

Did you hear that Change Jingle?

She was afraid and began telling herself that she was never meant to go to college just because she had never been. She was absolutely positive that if she just took another four months, maybe even six months off to perfect her study habits and separate more gradually from her friends, she might be able to face it–for surely, she thought, no eighteen year old on the face of the planet was as messed up and as confused as her.

Her parents said, “Ahhhhh, we know THIS Place. . . .

Did you hear that Change Jingle?

She indeed went off to college when that crucial moment came, just as planned and PAID. When she moved into her dorm, she called her mom and said, I”I think I’m going to like it here.

Her mom said, “Ahhhh, I know this place. . . .

In the morning she called her dad, crying, saying she was just too lonely to bear it.

Her dad said, “Ahhhh, I know this place. . . .

Did you hear THAT Change Jingle?

What is stopping you from doing what you always meant to do?

The worst kind of Change there is, isn’t the kind that jingles. . .

The worst kind of Change there is, is the kind that is Jingle-less, but still so loudly clanging around in your soul…eery. . . .

The only thing constant is Change and even when we are on the down slope of the see-saw we moan, “Why
couldn’t I have stayed at the top–longer?

C H A N G E. . .that never jingles or jangles so much as rattles…

Endlessly.

Flashes

August 25, 2014 By ChuckBehrens Leave a Comment

Today is August 25, four months, or about 120 days away from Christmas.

Hey, I make no excuses or do little to hide that Christmas is my favorite day of the year…actually, my favorite Season and in many ways, it’s already begun. I’ve seen Christmas decorations in some department stores–even before Labor Day. To me, it’s a great reminder of not only WHAT IS COMING, but WHAT IS ACTUALLY HERE!

Now.

What’s your favorite time of the year? What’s your favorite Season? What’s that one time during the 364 days that you always yearn, look forward to–C E L E B R A T E?

Is it your Birthday?

Anniversary?

A landmark moment of good news?

We do, don’t we?

We get F L A S H E S of it other than at an actual moment, the time, or the day, don’t we.

When’s the last time a day has come up and Flashed it self on you; surprised you, made you sit up and realize that your favorite day isn’t a day at all, not a season, a moment or an event–but a lifestyle?

If you lived with an expectancy, or better still, an actual KNOWING, that everyday contains not just elements but the very ingredients of whatever makes YOUR DAY ordinary, EXTRAordinary…wouldn’t Life be a little different?

NO…I don’t think so.

Anyone can DECIDE to have a good day–few actually DO.

Don’t be the proverbial Frog, sitting on a log who DECIDES to jump off–Deciding will keep him on that log for an eternity–L E A P!

News F L A S H

Your Special Day isn’t on the calendar, a time coming or going….

It’s NOW!

If you’ll excuse me, Fa-la-la-la-la, La, La, La LAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

A Newer Testament

August 22, 2014 By ChuckBehrens Leave a Comment

Friday Afternoon in a nursing home.

Lots of activity for most, but not for her.

She had said often, maybe too often, because of her vascular dementia, that she was an old clock with not many ticks left.

It seemed on this Friday afternoon, she was right.

I received a call mid-afternoon from her Hospice Nurse telling me that she was actively dying; that she was mottled on her hands and feet and up her legs to her knees. She reported that she was having periods of apnea as well, up to fifteen seconds of not breathing at a time.

She called me because she knew that we had a special relationship over the past eight months and felt that the patient would have liked to have me there.

I let the nurse know that I was on my way, but still about a half and hour to forty-five minutes away. She told me that she would stay with the patient until I got there and that she already had set up for a Vigil Volunteer to be there later in the evening if necessary.

The nurse and I had worked together with many previous patients. She was good. She was very competent, caring, compassionate and ATHEIST.

I didn’t think that believing or not believing or anything in between made a difference when it came to bringing compassionate care.

We had many discussions about “The whole God thing,” mostly brought up by her. I never forced those discussions or any of my beliefs. I had much admiration and respect for her and knew the care she brought to the bedside.

[Read more…]

SITE MAP