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Who Cares - What Matters
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EVERYONE RECOGNIZES HIM. . .Right?
ANY GUESSES. . . ?
In 1976, Shavarsh Karapetyan, an Armenian Olympic swimmer, had just completed a 12-mile run with his brother when they saw a trolley bus crash into a dam reservoir. The trolley bus sank 80 feet offshore at a depth of 33 feet. Shavarsh immediately dove in and swam to the bus and despite zero visibility, managed to kick in the back window, injuring himself in the process. He proceeded to save twenty people trapped in the bus, one at a time, for hours.
The combined effect of the cold water and his inquiries from breaking the glass window led to his hospitalization for 45 days after the incident, during which time he developed pneumonia, sepsis, and lung damage which ended his athletic career.
For years, his story wasn’t known, until an article about the event identified him by name in 1982. In 1985, he happened to pass by a burning building and rushed inside, again saving people trapped inside one at a time until he collapsed. He was again hospitalized with severe burns and lung damage.
He’s still kicking it at 66. . .Just a person. . .an awesome person that I just learned about the other day who made me think about a person, just another about to be 66 year old, ME(a-not-so-awesome-person); who may make you think about another (not-always-so-awesome person) YOU. . .
We are not often called or put in a situation to dive into freezing waters and kicking windows in or running into burning buildings and saving people at the risk of our own peril but that doesn’t mean we’re not called constantly to be caring, compassionate, loving, accepting, forgiving and giving of everyone we possibly may meet who’s not drowning in the water or burning in the fire but going through tremendous amounts of unseen hurt and personal tragedy. . .
To be
THAT PERSON
THAT CARING CATALYST. . .
ARE YOU THAT PERSON?
Psssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssst:
Never let a half picture
tell a whole story
. . .be the FILL
in the in-betweens of
Another’s Life. . .
THAT IS NOT
being heroic
THAT IS BEING
A CARING (DARING) CATALYST
It was an early Saturday morning
at Ames Family Hospice House
an Inpatient Unit for
Hospice of Western Reserve;
I was meeting a group of under graduate students from
Case Western Reserve University
to talk with them about
End of Life Issues
Death/Dying
and what Hospice means
and could mean for them in their life times.
It’s a tour I have conducted with Dr. Maryjo Prince-Paul,
their Professor for the last three years,
an excellent Educator/Informer
A former Certified Hospice Nurse
and an even better Friend. . .
I had just began talking with the students
having asking them to tell me
Their names
Their majors
Their Reason for taking this class;
Dr Prince-Paul asked me to share a few
Hospice Stories
of which I have a Memory Field of them:
Sad
Happy
Near-death experiences
Spiritual and Emotional
and all of the Psycho-Social dynamics
intermeshed into the fabric of these
death and dying issues. . .
I noticed as I was talking to these students
before the tour of the facility
a man walked into the back of the community living room
we had gathered
and sat, drinking his coffee;
THEN IT HAPPENED. . .
I asked the students if they had any questions
and Dr. Prince-Paul if she had any further comments
before we began the tour
and this brother of a patient at the inpatient Unit
stood with his hand raised and asked if he could make a comment;
Out all the tours and talks I had ever presented since beginning my
Hospice career in 1994,
this had never happened. . .
He began with:
“LISTEN TO WHAT THIS MAN IS TELLING YOU”
He continued by stating that he has seen death up close and personal
having served three tours in Vietnam
but seeing his younger brother dying of brain cancer
was an indescribable tour he’d never thought he’d have to journey;
he went on the praise
without urging/prompting
what an unbelievable healing experience this had been for he
and his other family members
who no longer could effectively take care of his brother
like the inpatient unit was now doing;
most valuably allowing them to be
FAMILY MEMBERS
to their brother, the patient
instead of Caregivers.
After speaking for nearly ten minutes
of which he had a very engaged and captive audience,
Dr Prince-Paul asked him his name:
“J o h n”
He apologized for ‘butting’ in;
but we thanked him for
TEACHING US ALL
what a lecture
what a book
what a class
what a measly tour
could never promise
or deliver:
AUTHENTIC, HONEST, HEARTFELT, MEANINGFUL
T E S T I M O N Y
J o h n
spoke from his heart
and we each heard with ours. . .
I couldn’t have hit a secret remote control button
that could have made it any more timely;
that could have made it any more significant. . .
My take away
no doubt was different than the students
that gathered together on that early Saturday morning. . .
As a veteran hospice employee
he taught me out of our vast resources
and our willingness to use and
our expertise to implement them
It’s not that it’s NOT
Music Therapy
It’s not that it’s NOT
Art Therapy
It’s not that it’s NOT
Our Particular Sounds
It’s not that it’s not our Surroundings and Perspectives
And not even so much as the Story
that needs Sharing
still untold/unwritten
So much as a Willingness
to give that VOICE
An open Ear
A P L A T F O R M. . .
To be A Caring Catalyst
is to be the Hearer of THAT Story
Are you THAT Person?
I told dozens of stories
that morning
but it’s the one that I heard
(and now re-tell)
that was experienced
the most. . .
“You’re young,” John told the group.
“You have your whole lives in front of you,” he continued; “that you are here this morning to learn; that you’re here to do something great with your lives for others is good.”
Thank you,
Professor John
for writing on a previously blank page of our books
that which will never be blank again;
nor will the pages we now will write following. . .
Amazing, isn’t it?
. . .There’s one thing to Seeing a Wave;
. . .There’s another thing to Catching a Wave;
. . .There’s another thing to Being a Wave;
. . .There’s another thing to SHARING A WAVE;
Just like it’s one thing to impact a person
and quite another to
EXPERIENCE THE INFLUENCE. . .
Strive to do both. . .
(often)
A Guest Lecturer
showed me it could be done
and in the process,
uncovered an UN-TRUTH:
WHEN YOU HELP ANOTHER, YOU HELP YOURSELF
L I E !
When you help another,
You help even many more than
T H A T O T H E R;
with all of the RIPPLES and WAVES their Shores touch;
And all the Waves and Ripples of Shores
EMANATING FROM YOUR’S. . .
It’s an never-ending TSUNAMI
of Unbelievable Kindness. . .
G E T S O A K E D
Well?
Everyone has a story that not only desperately needs to be told, but absolutely, unequivocally needs to be heard. Are you THAT Person? Or do you make sure person after person walks past you without caring, ever really trying to even begin to hear, understand, wonder if indeed, this is the worst day of their life?
Did you hear what I didn’t say? Many don’t. . .but DID YOU?
I might not want to share. It might not feel safe. I don’t want to waste your time or bother you.
But. . . .
Wait, linger a second or two longer and you might not, in fact, hear what I didn’t say, but actually understand, empathize and even make the story lighter, easier to carry, tell, hear.
And. . .and yes, if it hasn’t happened yet or many times over, there will be THAT time when your story needs to be told, desperately heard by another defeated, unsuspecting Someone who too has a untold, unheard Story!
If we truly could see in the Hearts of another, we’d better hear what wasn’t said but needs noticing.
Be THAT Someone. . .Often. And repeat, always, more than necessary!