The Caring Catalyst

Who Cares - What Matters

Putting the NEW in new year

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This video by J J Heller makes
It a fair question. . .
especially since 2021 is just barely
under a 100 hours old:
WHAT MAKES FOR A HAPPY NEW YEAR?
Wealth
Health
Fitness
Weight
Possessions
Relationships
Vaccines
Scientific Discoveries
Medical Advances
Bank Accounts
Books
Music
Movies
YOUR FILL IN THE ____________________WISH
W H A T ?

There’s a reason why the
Windshield
is so very much bigger
than the rear view mirror;
G A W K
unblinkingly
at what lies before you
with only a quick glance
at what’s already behind you
. . .good advice for a New Year;
better advice for what ails you
(and it cuts down tremendously on collisions)

So make sure when you look back
to see ahead
your eyes aren’t covered
and you don’t blink. . .
Do you want to know the secret for having a successfully awesome
2 0 2 1
. . .it’s no different than the success
of any other years:
DO MORE FOR OTHERS
THAN YOU DO FOR YOURSELF
. . .GUARANTEE:
Making others Happy
will bring you unspeakable joy
. . .It’s like taking someone out to dinner:
YOU GET FED, too
Hey, don’t take my words for it:
You’ve got
8 6 6 4
hours to prove it beginning
NOW

Put the NEW
in a New Year
(You are that Powerful)

Hap Hap HAPPIEST TIME OF THE YEAR

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Happy?

It’s not a hard to ask question.         .         .

It might be the toughest one to answer

or at least to try and understand

TO  ANSWER:

Are you HAPPY?

Brian Rea)

Johnny Mathis and a host of others have been singing for the 6 weeks IT’S    THE    MOST    WONDERFUL    TIME    OF    THE   YEAR

Charles Dickens wrote:
IT’S  THE  BEST  OF  TIMES, IT’S  THE  WORST  OF  TIMES

and even though it was from a TALE  OF  TWO  CITIES

and not

THE  CHRISTMAS  CAROL

it somehow seems that it could well fit,
doesn’t it?
The World is a huge

M   A   G   N   I   F   Y   I   N   G          G   L   A   S   S  

about now.          .          .

E        N        L        A        R        G        I        N        G

especially those things that make us the most unhappiest:Loss
Disappointment
Unmet
Expectation
DeathIllness
Job Security
Money Woes
Health
Family
Distances
or
anything else you might want to place in this:_________________________________________________________________________

HAPPINESS has traditionally been considered an elusive and evanescent thing. To some, even trying to achieve it is an exercise in futility. It has been said that “happiness is as a butterfly which, when pursued, is always beyond our grasp, but which if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you.”

Social scientists have caught the butterfly. After 40 years of research, they attribute happiness to three major sources: genes, events and values. Armed with this knowledge and a few simple rules, we can improve our lives and the lives of those around us. We can even construct a system that fulfills our founders’ promises and empowers all Americans to pursue happiness.
Psychologists and economists have studied happiness for decades. They begin simply enough — by asking people how happy they are.

The richest data available to social scientists is the University of Chicago’s General Social Survey, a survey of Americans conducted since 1972. This widely used resource is considered the scholarly gold standard for understanding social phenomena. The numbers on happiness from the survey are surprisingly consistent. Every other year for four decades, roughly a third of Americans have said they’re “very happy,” and about half report being “pretty happy.” Only about 10 to 15 percent typically say they’re “not too happy.” Psychologists have used sophisticated techniques to verify these responses, and such survey results haveprovedaccurate.

Beneath these averages are some demographic differences. For many years, researchers found that women were happier than men, although recent studies contend that the gap has narrowed or may even have been reversed. Political junkies might be interested to learn that conservative women are particularly blissful: about 40 percent say they are very happy. That makes them slightly happier than conservative men and significantly happier than liberal women. The unhappiest of all are liberal men; only about a fifth consider themselves very happy.          .          .

Mind you.        .        .

This story was op-ed was written by

Albert C. Brooks

in the New York Times

DECEMBER 13, 2014

but it could be

TODAY’S  HEADLINES

o r

T         O         M         O         R         R         O         W  ‘   S

So.          .          .

what      makes      you      happy?

It’s   not   answering

the   opposite   of

WHAT    MAKES    YOU    SAD?

Is  it  the  Hap

H  A  P

HAPPIEST   TIME  OF  THE  YEAR ?

Could it be?

Something tells me

you won’t need to consult the

Social Scientists

or house up in their

respective labs to

F I N D     O U T

and better.        .        .

provide that illusive feeling

for another.        .        .

Psssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssst:

You’re   the
R  e  a  s  o  n 

for      the
S   e  a  s  o  n

.          .          .Share   Excessively

(o   f   t   e   n)

BE    A    Producer    of    Smiles

infest

infect

others with

J          O          Y

Make it a neverending

incurable

epidemic.         .        .

E        X        C         E        S        S        I        V        E        L        Y

The Instrument of YOU

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Just what kind of an

I    N    S    T    R    U    M    E    N    T

are You?

St Francis of Assisi

prayed a timeless,

an ageless

prayer

that asked us—

you

me

to   be

I        n        s        t        r        u        m        e        n        t       s :

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace,

Where there is hatred, let me sow love;

where there is injury, pardon;

where there is doubt, faith;

where there is despair, hope; 

where there is darkness, light;

where there is sadness, joy; 

O Divine Master, Grant that I may not so much seek

to be consoled as to console;

to be understood as to understand;

to be loved as to love.

For it is in giving that we receive;

It is in pardoning that we are pardoned;

and it is in dying the we are born to eternal life.

T     R     U     T     H ?

No matter what kind of Instrument

You   are.          .          .

You  are  utterly  useless

on  a  seat

a  shelf

encased  for  protection.       .       .

but  in  the  Right  Hands

and  the  Right  Use

a  magnificent

w   a   l   k   i   n   g

t     a     l     k     i     n     g

S        Y        M        P        H        O        N        Y

You   Are.          .          .

Be    T   H   A   T

c          o          n          t          i          n          o          u          s          l          y

more   often

than     n o t

TWO QUESTIONS t o PARADISE

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W     E     L     L.          .          .

what answer you to enter into paradise:

H A V E     Y O U     F O U N D     J O Y     I N     Y O U R     L I F E

and even more so:

H  A  S     Y O U R       L  I  F  E       B  R  O  U  G  H  T      J  O  Y
T  O          O  T  H  E  R  S

Do   you   believe

as the ancient Egyptians believe that when your soul gets to heaven

you but have to answer these questions and

P                 R                 E                 S                 T                 O

If you found

J            O            Y

If you gave

J            O            Y

you entered into Paradise.          .          .

sounds simple

sounds glorious

doesn’t it.          .          .

Yesterday I was heading home after visiting  a couple who were making final plans on their upcoming wedding when I saw a little girl and her brother were selling Kool-Aid in their drive way.  Mom was doing some yard work behind them and when I stopped and asked them what they were selling they both yelled out:

“GRAPE  KOOL-AID”

“G R A P E     K  O  O  L  –  A  I  D, ” I yelled back.  “That’s my favorite.  How much do I owe you for my most favorite drink ever?”

They both yelled back, “A Quarter!”

“A Quarter?  Oh my, since it’s my most favorite drink ever would it be okay if I paid you both a dollar?”

“YES!  YES!  Mom, he’s going to pay us both a dollar for his most favorite drink!”

Mom was behind them, mouthing the words,

“T H A N K    Y O U”

I drank the small Dixie cup of watered down Grape Kool-Aid in front of them and let out a huge sigh as I wiped my mouth and told them:

“THE   BEST  EVER!   THANK YOU!”

Joy

received

JOY

shared :

P A R A D I S E

(In a Moment)

The Caring Catalyst

in me has a nice vision

a beautiful belief:

F          I          N          D          I          N          G

S          H          A          R          I          N          G

j          o          y

I  S

P       A       R       A       D       I       S       E

h     e    r     e

and

t      h      e      r      e

(u s h e r     i t )

o f t en

IN FOXED

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https://youtu.be/Dd_0BIuZgHg

Are you more of a Fox or

are you more of a Mouse.        .        .

The       C   O   R   R   E   C   T           A   N   S   W   E   R:

Y                    E                    S

We’ve   been   both.         .         .

many  times

many  different  times

many  different  ways

a     n     d

many  more  times  to  come

in  for  both  cases.            .          .

it’s  never

T H I S     S E A S O N

about   being   one   or   the   other

it’s   always   knowing

you’ll   be   both

sometimes   at   the   same   time.          .          .

It’s   not   about   being

O U T  F O X E D

or  a  fearful  little  meek  M O U S E

.         .        .so  much  as  it’s  about

being   in   constant

R        E        L         A         T          I          O            N          S          H         I          P

e   s   p   e   c   i   a   l   l   y

when   we   are   one

and   then   the   other

and   mostly   when

we’re   caught   in t  he

i n b e t w e e n.          .          .

T                    A                    G  :

Y  o  u ‘ r  e        I  T!

Get your Caring Catalyst ON

and MOUSE UP

be the fierce Fox another needs

of  you

(o f t e n)

LAUGH MAN

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The   World   is   a   Sad   Place

u n l e s s.          .          .

Thanks to the World Laughter Tour and Dr. Steve Wilson

I became a Certified Laughter Leader

in February, 2016

but often

I’m more C E R T I F I A B L E 

than CERTIFIED.        .        .

I recently provided a workshop

for a Hospice Team

that was organized by their FUN COMMITTEE.       .       .

Shortly following the workshop

one of the Nurses on the Team sent me this email:

Chuck, Thanks for the laughs. I think you answered a question for me.  A year ago an acquaintance of my brother and I had posted on FaceBook that she could not tell the difference between us from posted pictures.  My nephew posted that the the pictures where the guy was smiling was my brother.  The other pictures were of his uncle, me.  Since I do not use social media, I wouldn’t have noticed except my daughter pointed out to me how she had put her cousin in his place.  (Such fire can come from gentle souls!)  Since then though I have been checking in with the mirror to see where the smile went  I was most puzzled because (1) My nickname in high school was “ear to ear,” and (2) I thought that I was smiling.  I have been watching my peers in team and I have noticed that we do not smile except the we are laughing.  As I watched you, I did not see a smile except with laughter.  When your face relaxed the corners of your mouth relaxed downward.  I have a voice from the past that says, “It  takes more  muscles  to  frown  than  to  smile.”  What has happened?  I think that it is this: Both smiles and frowns are surface expressions and quickly deceive  Of the two, though, are work allows for the frown as the more acceptable.  I think that we spend a great deal of effort in the trenches where smiles are inappropriate.  We have lost the ability to smile from disuse of smiling muscles  So though we may be smiling on the inside, our faces do not show it.  I do not think that this is either good or bad.  I thing that it as the artist, Chuck Close has said, “The  face  is  a  road  map  of  a  person’s life.”  You showed me today that you do not have to be able to smile to be able to laugh,  Hohohahaha, YEAH! Thanks.

How about an

“A”

for paying way more than just Attention

but   for  really

N        O        T        I        C        I        N        G

Harry Chapin

is still one of my favorite musicians.        .         .

He died tragically in a car accident

on July 16, 1981, at 39 years of age.        .         .

He wrote a song,

L  A  U  G  H      M  A  N

that I’ve always related to personally and publicly

long before becoming a Certified Laughter Leader

.         .         .maybe it embodies and describes the essence of all of us:

https://youtu.be/ZpQ_eqi4UKU

The   World   can   be   a   really   sad   Place.        .          .

u n l e s s

I   make   it   a   different

r            e            s            i            d            e            n            c            e

join me

in proving

w     h     o     e     v     e     r

L       A      U      G      H      S

l    a    s    t    s.       .       .

Let’s    be    about

P        R        O        V        I        N        G                 I        T

HappiMESS

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What brings a Smile to your face?

Are you Happy?

What made you that way.       .       .

A person.       .       .

A place.       .       .

A possession.       .       .

An object.       .       .

An Act.       .        .

An animal.        .        .

A Dream.        .        .

A Destination.       .       .

What  makes  you  Happy?

Martin Seligman, the Papa of Positive Psychology,

Theorizes that about 60% of Happiness

is actually determined

by our genetics and environment.          .          .

The remaining 40%

is     up     to      U  S.          .          .

Seligman  more  than  hints

that  really   HAPPY   PEOPLE

have habits that can actually

Be introduced

into their everyday lives.        .        .

T    R    U     E

       o  r

F   A   L   S   E ?

I can’t tell you

The TWELVE   WAYS   TO   OPEN   YOUR   HEART

or HOW TO NEVER HAVE A SAD MOMENT

not  bad  titles  for  books  or  articles

but it seems that Being

A     C  A  R  I  N  G      C  A  T  A   L  Y  S  T

and being  Happy  have a lot of similarities.        .        .

B     O     T     H

Put    Others    First

B     O     T     H

Put   Character   Before   Conformity  

B     O     T     H

Put    WE    before    ME

B     O     T     H

Place    Cause    before    Comfort

B     O     T     H

Place    Risk    before    Reward.        .       .

Seligman spoke of three kinds of

H A P P Y      L I V E S:

P     L     E     A     S     A     N     T

(only    seeking    pleasure)

E    N    G    A    G    E    D

(investing    in    work    or    others)

M    E    A    N    I    N    G    F    U    L

(living    for    something    larger    than    yourself)

It’s   really   more   than   a

M         A         Y         B         E

isn’t   it?

Ultimate 

A u t h e n t i c

H   a   p   p   i    n    e    s   s

comes in giving ourselves

to something larger

than ourselves.        .        .

The      t    r    u    t    h  ?

The difference between

H A P P I N E S S

and a

H A P P I M E S S

is more than just one letter removed

from the alphabet.          .          .

But     maybe     you     have      another     idea.          .          .

S    H    O    W         M    E

Immunity

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images-3

When was your first time?

When was the very first time you didn’t actually believe. . .

When was the very first time you actually knew,

K          N          E          W

that you weren’t going to live forever?

Was it was you went to the funeral of a friend, a relative, a dear loved one. . .

was it just when you read an obituary, even of one you didn’t even know the person?

When was it?

Sometimes  THAT  happens when you sit on the other side of the desk of a Doctor and his face tells you what you don’t want his mouth to ever say and your ears to ever heard.

Have you felt    T     H     A     T  ?

The biggest problem with   T   H  A  T 

is most of them are   T     H     A     T  ‘  S

They’re  P L U R A L

We had a great family reunion the Saturday before Easter.

My brother and his family were in from San Antonio

and even though not every family member was present

there were a great number of us

t o g e t h e r

for several hours.

We all knew just how precious and priceless was   T H A T    Moment

and then.     .     .

less than two weeks later

a humbling, powerful, very life-threatening event takes place

and my father is in the hospital.

It’s then. . .

It’s there that you go to a place a GPS can’t follow, lead or identify. . .

a  Continent that doesn’t exist called

I          M          M          U          N          I          T          Y

The harshest truth to ever be discovered and rediscovered

is the one to never be hidden or forgotten,

only in slight moments overlooked:

NONE OF US ARE IMMUME

not if you have a heart beat, a pulse, a mind that can half reason or not so easily forget

NONE OF US ARE IMMUNE

from hurt

(FROM JOY)

from disappointment

(FROM HAPPINESS)

from unmet expectations

(FROM FULFILLED GOALS)

from unfulfilled dreams

(FROM VISIONS REALIZED)

from undreamt imaginings

(FROM UNDERSTANDINGS GRANTED)

from sickness

(FROM PERFECT WELLNESS)

from losing

(FROM GAINS)

from failing

(FROM VICTORIES)

from being on the other side of the sheets

(FROM BEING ON THE SHEETS)

from dying

(FROM LIVING)

F          R          O          M

NOT  being immune

from it  ALL 

has a certain blessing that a wish can’t hold or grant

has a certain authenticity that makes a heart, beat–especially a broken one

has an awareness that a life lived–

L     I     V    E    S

It’s what can’t be traded. . .only owned

which births another sort of immunity

s     h     a     r     e     d

and only known fully from the grave to which we all go. . . .

When. . .

w   h   e   n     have you ever felt

 T   H   A   T ?

(This is a re-working on one of a four installments of  THE ROUGH SIDE OF THE SHEETS  that I wrote back in August/September 2015 after my wife, Erin suffered a series of seizures; these are some of the lessons experienced, learned, and now hopefully shared again since my father suffered a fall with several complications ensuing since his surgery.  It’s my hope that you enjoy these journey-ings, and more, take the time to share a few of yours that that we can all learn a little more about those razor-blade laden sheets…and in the sharing, soften them a little and bring a fragrance from which they knew not.  It’s been nearly eight months since Erin experienced her seizures, and a week since my dad’s fall and surgery; daily they recover and ready themselves to live Life in the Shadow of Death of which no one is Immune that reminds us all: YOUR PAIN IS MY PAIN)

It’s In Every ONE of Us. . . .

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I first saw this video well over 20 years ago

at all places. . .

A Humor Conference.

I love when I have shown this to children–

they   laugh–a lot !

I use to show this video with new Volunteers or Spiritual Care Volunteers with Hospice.

I would always ask this question as soon as it was over:

W     H     A     T ?

WHAT’S  IN  EVERY  ONE  OF  US ?

Pain

Un-met expectations

Hurt

Disappointment

Suffering

Expectations

Hopes

Joys

Love

Fear

Faith

Doubt

Happiness

Sadness.  .  .

I mean the list really is endless and it’s all with the same message, isn’t it?

IT’S  IN  EVERY  ONE  OF  US. . .

it’s the one universal assurance–given–in our lives

ANY  LIFE !

My favorite part of the video is near the end where it illustrates  THAT  point the best

when one face  morphs  into the next face into the next face into the next face. . . .

There’s so much in this World that separates us

. . .so much

that really doesn’t

What. . .what do you notice.     .     .recognize

the   m o s t ?

Psssssst:  Rub your eyes. . .rub them again. . .

do more than look–

S          E          E

celebrate

live

what’s

In     Every     One     Of     Us

and never            experience           it any other way.

Blending Opposites

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images-3

When was the last time you felt totally

B A LA NC ED. . .?

If you talk to any person or group of people they most likely will admit to you that

BALANCE

is work and rare for any length of time.

Well, of course there’s an APP for THAT and now, of all things, a bracelet.

A LOKAI Bracelet.

It’s a stretchable bracelet that has a Black Bead containing mud from the Dead Sea, the lowest point on Earth. The Black Bead symbolizes the most Difficult moments you may experience throughout life.

Directly across from the Black Bead of Difficulty is a White Bead containing water from Mt. Everest, the highest point on Earth, highlighting Life’s Highest moments. The water is actually infused into the silicone mixture and then injected into the White ball itself to insure that the water is always in the Bead.

The Clear Beads in between are clear to remind us that

C L A R I T Y

is key in times of both, Joy and Sadness.

The Clear Beads also symbolize that we all have

A STORY

and those Beads just represent pieces of THAT Story.

The Lokai Bracelet was created by a man named Steven Izen after he learned that his grandfather had been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s Disease. The experience of joy and sadness was experienced so close together that he thought life is

C I R C U L A R

and throughout our highest HIGHS and lowest LOWS, it’s important to always remain balanced.

Why LOKAI?

The name was inspired by the Hawaiian Word: L O K A H I
which means UNITY and to BLEND OPPOSITES. . . .

It’s main purpose is to

R E M I N D

us to simply stay HOPEFUL and know that even in the most darkest moments

IT WILL GET BETTER!

I asked HER about this bracelet when I first saw it and in part, that was the explanation I received.

My knee-jerk follow up question was:

DOES IT WORK?

There was no hesitation before I got a one-word answer:

A B S O L U T E L Y.

I swallowed hard the remark,

“SO DOES SHARK REPELLENT IN OHIO!”

What is it for you?

What gives. . .brings. . .assures. . .infuses. . .promises. . .delivers. . .

B A LAN CE in YOU?

Is it a Bracelet?
Is it a Blanket?
Is it a Robe?
Is it a piece of jewelry?
Is it a Symbol?
Is it a piece of clothing?
Is it a Chair?
Is it Music?
Is it a Written Word?
Is it Food?
Is it Alcohol?
Is it Drugs?
Is it a certain kind of meditation?
Is it a massage?
Is it_______________________________________________?

Whatever you feel brings you Balance, does–doesn’t it?

What YOU THINK really is a powerful, second-to-none-potion.

Pssssssst: It’s NOT the same thing for Everyone.

The real irony is that

WHATEVER IT IS

is seldom utilized.

IT should be used often/always. . .

and then…then Shared!

(NO, NOT THE SYMBOL FOR THE BALANCING)

But YOUR BALANCED SELF!

YOUR BALANCED SELF IS THE GREATEST FORM OF BALANCE YOU CAN BRING TO ANOTHER. . .
(WHICH IS THE REASON I WEAR MY LOKAI BRACELET–TO BE BALANCED TO BRING BALANCE).

A Peaceful Heart Comforts a Troubled Heart

which equals

A BLENDED BALANCE!

Slip THAT on for Size

Professional Speaker, Author, Assurance Man