https://youtu.be/SQuyCc1Cuac
So just what is in your
L U N C H B O X. . .
Maybe the bigger question is:
just
what
are
you
w i l l i n g
t o
s h a r e. . .
and the greatest question yet:
A R E Y O U ?
When Humility Dials a Phone
Sometimes it happens to
M E. . .
Y o u ?
Sometimes my inner and outer
Caring Catalyst
gets scabbed over
o k. . .
C A L L O U S E D
and then it gets
s o f t e n e d
with the
s i m p l e s t
the most
s i g n i f i c a n t
things:
A mere phone call. . .
I hadn’t heard from him in a long time–
y e a r s
We had been colleagues
but never close
and never social. . .
we might have seen each other across the room
at a conference or a luncheon presentation
but neither would make a move to meet
in the middle. . .
an acquaintance
nothing more
maybe even
l e s s
and then
I had heard recently after giving a presentation
at a local hospital
that he had suffered a severe stroke. . .
I think I reached out
benignly
via a FaceBook Instant Message
that I was thinking of him and wishing him the best
and then. . .
h o n e s t l y
I f o r g o t a b o u t him. . .
When the cell phone rang
I didn’t recognize the number
but I broke my rule of answering a
number I didn’t recognize
and it was him. . .
He quickly identified himself
and even before I could say
h e l l o
or ask him how he was doing
he was apologizing. . .
asking forgiveness for
not keeping in touch
talking about me behind my back
not being supportive when he knew I had been going through a particularly tough professional situation. . .
and then through broken sobs
he was asking if I and everyone I knew
could pray for his healing—
not his complete healing from the stroke,
just a partial healing that would allow him to play his music
on the piano and guitar
he often did for patients and families
and with a jazz group he would jam with
on Friday nights. . .
the scab gave loose. . .
the callous
s o f t e n d
Sometimes it happens to me. . .
y o u ?
Sometimes my inner and outer
Caring Catalyst
gets scabbed
ok. . .
C A L L O U S E D;
Has that happened to you?
When was the last time?
Me?
It happened when
Humility Dialed A Phone
and
I
a n s w e r e d
the scab gave loose
the callous–
softened. . .
Me. . . ?
h u m b l y
c h a n g e d
When Generosity is More than a W O R D
Do you have one?
Do you remember a time when you actually saw an
A C T O F G E N E R O S I T Y ?
Erin, my wife, gave this Parka from Alaska via a Thrift store, right off her back on a cold winter day when she saw someone she recognized, who rode his bike everyday from his house to a local coffee shop, now in a cold snow storm, without a coat.
A friend, Terry, did the same thing a few years ago. A group of us from Church made sandwiches, bought gloves to literally pass out to the homeless on a cold, Sunday afternoon. We literally had given everything we came downtown to give and there was one, cold gentleman who got there late and asked if there was anything left; the sandwiches, gloves, hats had all been distributed, but Terry literally took off her coat and sweatshirt and gave it to the man.
I just heard about a guy on an airplane who actually tipped the Flight Attendant a $100.00 for the amazing job she did serving during the flight.
He was standing at a Stop Light in front of a Strip Mall with a Panera Bread. As I came up to the light he was standing there just holding a sign. . .no bucket or anything to collect money. He wasn’t aggressive. . .just standing there holding a sign I’ve never seen anyone E V E R hold before:
S E E K I N G H U M A N K I N D N E S S
I rolled down the window and for the first time in my life,
gave a $10 d o l l a r b i l l
and the meal we had just bought. . .
I never knew that such an offering could buy such an expression on someone’s face;
Do you have one?
Do you remember a time when you actually saw an
A C T O F G E N E R O S I T Y ?
There is no way to ever measure,
is there,
the exact effect it had on the
O N E
who actually received such an act of generosity–
F O R G E T T H A T
Having witnessed an Act of Generosity…
WHAT EFFECT DID IT HAVE ON YOU?
Has it worn off?
Did it inspire you to
GO AND DO LIKEWISE ?
G e n e r o u s A C T S
will do that…
so do the TELLING
so do the HEARING
of such acts. . . .
DO TELL
S H A R E
so that WE will not only get the benefit. . .
but be inspired to make our own
Stories of Generosity
to be witnessed
to tell
to be told
to experience
to inspire yet even more
to tell
to be told
to experience
to inspire
to make
G E N E R O S I T Y
more than just a mere
WORD. . .
DO TELL
S H A R E
What’s
Y O U R S T O R Y ?
Harmonics
It’s true. . .
I’m a One – Song – Musician
When it comes to the Harmonica the very first song I learned,
ended up literally being the last one:
O L D S U S A N N A
I usually get lots of mileage out of that when I’m giving a Keynote Speech.
I relay it back to the strong fact that there’s not really much need for a
One-Song-Musician.
I mean, I can’t book a Concert Hall and play Old Susanna for a solid two-and-a-half hours to be followed by another fifteen minute encore, right?
The point?
Just because we do
ONE OUTSTANDING DEED,
it doesn’t let us off the hook for never having to do another one–EVER!
As much as there just isn’t much need for a One-Song-Musician,
there’s not a whole lot of curtain calls for a
One-Deed-Good-Samaritan, either.
We are NOT called to do good,
to be Compassionate,
Caring,
Understanding,
Accepting,
Forgiving,
just once or once in a while. . .
but E V E R Y T I M E
I had just given an early morning talk to an area Rotary Club
and actually began the talk without saying a word. . .
just pulling out my harmonica and playing my beloved,
O N E S O N G
I made my point.
I finished my talk to a standing ovation
(I knew I could play THAT song, but I had no idea it would cause such a powerful reaction)
and after staying around and talking with several people,
I made my way to the nearest STARBUCKS for my morning cup of coffee before during some patient visits,
a funeral
and another talk to end the day.
I KID YOU NOT
while I was standing in line,
there was a guy who came into a now fairly crowded STARBUCKS to get his morning fix actually
playing a harmonica!
Everyone kind of stopped. . .
I mean texting, googling, face-booking, tweeting, talking–
and looked up as the guy get in line right beside me playing his bluesy song.
When he came up for a breath,
I told him that I too was a HARMONICIST
“Really,” he sounded surprised?
“Really, ” I echoed back,
“but I’m a very specialized harmonicist.”
“Specialized?”
“Yes sir! I know just one song, but I know it real, real, REAL good–Old Susanna!”
We both laughed.
I asked him what he liked playing the best and he answered me by playing some rag-tag-hot-bluesy-piece.
I told him
T H A T
just earned him a free cup of coffee.
Now that our order was in, we went to the end of the other line to wait to our Fixes.
He told me that he played at as many amateur nights as he could find,
but often had to compete unfairly with guitarists.
Our orders now delivered,
I shook his hand,
thanked him for his mini-concert and wished him continued success and blessings in the present and future.
His last sentence to me was of pure music. . .
Grammy worthy:
“Thanks, my man. . .
I’m just a song looking for a pair of ears!”
Ain’t we all?
Well, worth a cup of coffee, huh?
Who would have thought that I walked in thirsting for a Breve Venti Latte
and walked out with my latte,
a smile,
a story and a great memory that I,
that we,
are m o r e,
so very much more than meets the eye or the ear.
What a shame if it were just shared
O N C E !
B E
the song that needs heard,
sung,
danced,
remembered
–repeatedly–
often. . .
H A R M O N I C S
At it’s Best !
(and o u r s)
A Helper’s High(er)
Have you ever suffered from
A L T I T U D E S I C K N E S S ?
I’m not asking what’s the highest mountain you’ve ever climbed
or if you’ve ever hiked a Pike’s Peak-like trail;
I’m asking did you ever feel the highest of high’s:
A H E L P E R ‘ S H I G H ?
No, it’s not a myth or even a goal to have or aspire. . .
it’s very real and like most real things,
it not only evokes a lot of opinions and theories,
but also a lot of studies that actually present facts.
Take any N D A D. . .
That’s right, a Non-Directed Anonymous Donor. . .these are people who literally walk in off the street and say that they are healthy and would like to donate a kidney; not to a family member or a distant relative or a very close childhood friend. . .NO, to an actual person they have never met and quite possible never will; a true; NON-DIRECTED ANONYMOUS DONOR.
Dr. David Lansburg, director of kidney transplants for British Columbia, Vancouver says that such a donation sets off a chain reaction of giving as well as a saving multiple lives.
You think?
Dr. Abraham Maslow called such acts, witnessed and shared,
P E A K E X P E R I E N C E S. . .
Dr. Jonathan Haidt is a psychologist calls this peak experience ELATION and describes it as a warm feeling in the chest, a sensation of expansion in the heart, an increased desire to help, and increased sense of connection with others.
Well. . .
are you buying THIS a cup of coffee
or treating it like some discarded moldy grounds?
BE YOUR OWN STUDY
You don’t have to go too far back into your own personal photo album to remember,
do you?
If someone yells at you for no good reason, first thing in the morning. . .
it’s sets off a chemical reaction inside of you that would make the most sophisticated Chemistry Sets pale in comparison.
Pssssssssssssssst:
The same is true if you
DO GOOD. . .or even witness good being done!
FACT: When you do even the simplest of kind things, you literally feel happier–because you do; it’s the brain’s natural versions of morphine and heroin–they call it dopamine.
FACT: Kindness gives you a healthier heart. Oxytocin causes the release of nitric oxide which expands the blood vessels, hence, lowering blood pressure.
FACT: Kindess slows down the aging process. The study of Tibetan Buddhist’s Loving Kindness Compassion meditation found that kindness and compassion did, in fact, reduce inflammation in the body.
FACT: Kindness makes for better relationships. Seriously, do you hate seeing an act of kindness or actually having one done to you?
FACT: Kindness is contagious. Let’s go back to our 28 year old Non-Directed Anonymous Donor (NDAD) who walked into a clinic and donated a kidney. It set off a “pay it forward ” type of ripple effect where the spouses or other family members of recipients of a kidney donated one of theirs to someone in need. The “domino effect,” as it is called in the New England Journal of Medicine report, spanned the length and breadth of the United States, where 10 people received a new kidney as a result of a that single anonymous donor.
So. . .
you want to get H I G H ?
Get your kindness on. . .
It’s the one Rock you can throw
that’ll start three ripples with the first skip:
The ripple for the recipient
The ripple for you
The ripple for the one who might see the kindness. . .
One simple act of kindness will get you a one way ticket to a
H e l p e r ‘s H i g h
W A R N I N G:
B E W A R E. . .
T H I S I S H I G H L Y A D D I C T I V E
Your Compassion Fingerprint
WHAT’S IN IT FOR ME ?
It’s a question asked by many. . .
by me. . .
by you. . .
b y u s.
It’s really asked when it comes to
being kind,
being compassionate,
not o n c e,
but time and again and again,
over and over.
HOW MANY TIMES IS ENOUGH?
WHEN’S IT OUR TURN?
WHY NOT US?
All good questions,
but can we just take a deep breath,
no. . .
go ahead and take three deep breaths in a row,
holding each one for about five seconds
and then letting them all the way out real slowly. . .
P A U S E
And reframe the Questions
to just one single
o n e:
W h y P r a c t i c e C o m p a s s i o n ?
The scientific research is really starting to pile up
and it all dramatically points to what you might have felt
but now can fully experience.
The benefits of being
C o m p a s s i o n a t e,
literally,
can improve your health,
well-being,
and relationships,
both your intimate,
close ones as well the fringe friendships. . .
Many scientists are even telling us that Compassion may even be vital to the survival of our species and through actual dedicated, intentional practice, these benefits can literally be
off the charts !
The Compassion Research is telling us:
- Compassion makes us feel good: a compassionate act activates pleasure circuits in the brain.
- Being Compassionate–tuning in to other people in a kind and loving ways can actually reduce the risk of heart disease by boosting the positive effects of the Vargus Nerve, which helps to slow our heart rate.
- Brain scans during loving-kindness meditation, which directs compassion toward suffering, suggest that, on average, compassionate people’s minds wander less about what’s gone wrong in their lives or what might go wrong in the future, making them happier.
- Brain scans also show that when people experience compassion, their brains activate in neural systems to support parental nurturance–they become better parents.
- Compassion helps make people better spouses; they’re more optimistic and supportive when communicating with others.
- Compassion helps make better friends.
- Employees who receive more compassion in their workplace see themselves, their co-workers, and their organization in a more positive light, report feeling more positive emotions like joy and contentment, and are more committed to their jobs.
- Compassionate people are more socially adept, making them less vulnerable to loneliness; loneliness has been shown to cause stress and hare the immune system.
So. . .
WHAT’S IN IT FOR ME?
Hmmmmmmmmmm. . .
it seems,
not one thing. . .
It’s m a n y things!
Pssssssssssssssssst:
N E V E R T R U S T T H E S C I E N C E !
Use yourself as your own private lab experiment. . .
Test it for yourself.
What have you got to lose?
Ummmmmmmmmmm:
Just being
L E S S C O M P A S S I O N A T E !
A True VICTOR
Are you a Victim
or a
V I C T O R ?
Or just a
Chuck,
Erin,
Sam,
Henry,
Danica,
Johnny,
Joe,
an Anybody. . .
Somebody. . .
Nobody. . . ?
About once a month we get free buffets at the Horseshoe Casino
Great Dinner. . .
but the
S E R V I C E
was way beyond ordinary;
V i c t o r
He seated us
and poured out ice teas
and then gave us some complimentary bottled waters. . .
He got real excited when he announced
that he had something very special for us,
and he even more excited
when he brought some special made appetizers. . .
did I mention that this was a b u f f e t
and not some Four-Star restaurant?
He brought us back fancy desserts
that weren’t up on the dessert tray. . .
He couldn’t be more accommodating and kind;
He got a little embarrassed
when I asked him about himself
and how long he had been working here at the casino. . .
He said he loved
w a i t i n g
on people
and that we had been great people to serve. . .
W O W
I was watching the other servers,
but no one was running around like Victor. . .
No one was giving
who they were serving
anything e x t r a. . .
I even saw a few roll their eyes
when someone had left them a less than satisfactory tip. . .
Victor was a most excellent
S E R V E R
A True Caring Catalyst
I gave him a huge tip that night. . .
He was very grateful and very surprised;
I told him that he was most excellent and he
m a d e
our night extra ordinary. . .
I have him a big tip
but he had given me a
t i p
much larger
and even more significant:
S E R V E P E O P L E
MORE THAN THE EXPECT OR DESERVE
WITHOUT ANY EXPECTATION OF ANYTHING IN RETURN
He made me ask a question
a r e a l q u e s t i o n:
Am I more of a
V i c t i m
or a
V I C T O R ?
Victor showed me that no matter what Color
No matter what your Race,
No matter what your Creed,
No matter what your Gender,
No matter what your political Persuasion,
You can still serve others by serving in the best way possible;
Victor showed me that it’s not about
doing for others as you would have them do unto you
so much as serving others as they would like
in a most perfect way. . .
Victor s h o w e d
that it’s not about giving people what they deserve,
it’s about just giving to others
j u s t b e c a u s e
Are you?
Are you more
A Victim
or
A V i c t o r?
Psssssssssssssst:
S H O W M E. . .
better still
S H O W O T H E R S
(lots of them)
o f t e n
Life ASSURANCE
This week is a very Holy week in the Judeo-Christian population that spans the World.
It always brings to surface the most interesting questions and debates but it always focuses on doing for others what you would want done for you. . .
for being
K I N D;
We spend literal billions of dollars
INSURING LIFE
but easily go in the
RED
when it comes to
ASSURING LIFE. . .
What’s in it for you?
Is it just Dollars and Cents?
A nicer Home?
Better furnishings?
Higher Education?
Prestigious Job?
Comfy Bank Account?
Healthy Check-Up’s?
W H A T ?
I mean, can we actually LIVE
off a Feel-Good Emotions?
Will merely witnessing HAPPINESS
make you HAPPY?
Will reaching UNDERSTANDING
make you HAPPY?
Will feeling Love
guarantee what no money or vast amounts of it
BUY?
WHAT IS IT YOU DESIRE MOST?
Sometimes. . .
It’s NOT the Ripple you cause,
but the one you
C A U S E T O B E C A U S E D
in others. . .
The one you might never know exists,
let alone ever having knowledge of I N D U C I N G. . .
Life INSURANCE
may never be used. . .
L I F E A S S U R A N C E
will never fail NOT being Utilized;
Hmmmmmmmmm of the Day:
LIFE ASSURANCE is something we’ll all be able to CASH in on. . .
It’s what’ll make a Holy Week,
H O L Y
even when it’s
N O T !
Now
THAT’S a POLICY
we all should invest in
L A S T W E E K. . .
The World in Your Hands
YOU
hear it more and more:
IT’S NOT A SMALL WORLD
SO MUCH AS JUST A BIG LIVING ROOM. . .
I do a Keynote presentation where I hand out of Baggie full of objects
that helps us Understand that very thing:
IT’S NOT A SMALL WORLD SO MUCH AS JUST A BIG LIVING ROOM
One of the small objects I place in the baggie is a puzzle piece;
I tell the audience that the we’re often told to
LOOK AT THE BIG PICTURE
which is really an overwhelming thing to do. . .
It is
P I E C E b y P I E C E
that our lives are literally put together and
T A K E S H A P E
R E C E I V E M E A N I N G
I give the audience a puzzle piece to remind them just how important
I S
T H E M O M E N T
I give the audience a puzzle piece to remind them just how
WE ALL FIT TOGETHER.
Mother Theresa once said,
“IF I LOOK AT THE MASS, I WILL NEVER ACT.”
If she thought about just how many suffering victims there were in the World, it would have been emotionally paralyzing and prevented from actually providing help.
I don’t have to help every poor, hungry, down-on-their-luck-no-one-gives-a-damn-about-me-person in the World. . .
JUST THE ONE IN FRONT OF ME
JUST THE ONE BEHIND ME
JUST THE ONE BESIDE ME
J U S T T H E O N E !
We really do have the World in our Hands. . .
It’s not so big
T H A T W A Y,
is it?
Very manageable;
I don’t know the 12 Mystical Ways to Open your Soul
I don’t know the 21 Magical Ways to open your Heart
I do know that when
I LISTEN WITH MORE THAN MY EARS
I RESPOND AND NOT SO MUCH REACT
I REPLENISH MY SOUL TO REFILL ANOTHER’S
I REMEMBER THE WHOLE PERSON
I SUFFER WHAT OTHER’S HAVE SUFFERED
I GIVE MYSELF A PASS FOR BEING TOO HUMAN
I know
that my Puzzle Piece becomes a little bit more important
I know
that the World becomes a little bit more smaller in my Hands. . .
More, uhhhh,
H A N D A B L E
for me
for you
for us
A L L
W O R D S
Stick and stones will break my bones but words will never hurt me. . .
T r u e, h u h ?
Words, won’t hurt you at all. . .
they’ll maim,
mutilate,
humiliate,
and possibly stop you growing for quite sometime if ever,
the same again,
but no,
W o r d s w i l l n e v e r h u r t y o u . . .
It was our parents and grandparents way of protecting us from bullies wasn’t it?
But again,
the biggest bullies we ever face
might not be those we perceive to do us harm
from the “OUTSIDE,”
but those who are the very closest to us,
wives,
husbands,
mothers,
fathers,
sons,
daughters,
grandparents,
nieces/nephews,
brothers,
sisters,
friends, or, yes. . ,
even o u r s e l v e s !
I WISH THAT YOU WOULD SAY__________________________________________
We all have our individual ways
of filling in the most important blank
that often leaves us
B L A N K—–
E m p t y. . .
H O W we fill in that Blank
is much more important than W H A T
we fill in it’s________________________.
And yes,
we know it,
we know we know it,
we bet our lives that we know it,
but for the life of us,
we mostly act like we don’t know:
We can be that
Glorious Blank FILLER
for others. . .
I WISH THAT YOU WOULD SAY. . .
Needs to be replaced with:
TELL ME WHAT YOU’D LIKE TO HEAR
THAT WOULD MAKE YOU THE
H A P P I E S T. . .
and then do more than listen,
or hear. . .
but do accordingly. . .
Absolutely,
YOUR WORDS ARE POWERFUL . .
Use them as the balm that soothes i
nstead of the bash that bruises. . .
In the End,
we will remember not the words of our enemies,
but the silence of our friends
–Martin Luther King, Jr.
Sticks and stones will break my bones but words will. . .
hmmmmmmmmmmm. . .
Fill in
“T H E B L A N K”
C o m p a s s i o n a t e ly . . .
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