The Caring Catalyst

Who Cares - What Matters

Taught

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Amazing isn’t it.     .     .

it’s rarely about Teaching;

Amazing isn’t it.      .      .

it’s rarely about the Student;

Amazing isn’t it.       .       .

it’s rarely about them

N O T  finding themselves

T     o     g     e     t     h     e     r

at the exact time they’re both needed to show up.      .      .

The Teacher doesn’t always Teach.       .       .

The Student doesn’t always Learn.       .       .

But.       .       .

when that exact moment

the two are on the Same Page

in THE SAME BOOK.        .        .

Learning just doesn’t take place,

M         A         G         I         C

h a p p e n s.  .  .

Who was   that   Teacher for   your   Student?

It doesn’t always happen in the Classroom,

does   it?

Maybe that’s the problem.        .        .

we look for the Teacher in a Classroom,

chalk in hand,

Blackboard at their back,

opened Book,

Power-Pointed Up,

Lecturing,

Instructing,

Directing,

Assigning.        .        .

Maybe that’s the problem.      .      .

we look for the Student in a Classroom,

slumped in seat,

doodling on blank pages,

reading the same sentence/paragraph

over and over again,

feigning attention.       .       .

 But the Teacher,

the Student

can be in grocery story lines,

or movie theaters,

or ballgames,

or swim meets,

or at a diner,

a car wash,

Church,

a Mosque,

Synagogue,

Cathedral,

Cemetery,

Drive-Thru,

Playground,

Anywhere.      .      .

Anyplace.      .      .

Anytime.      .      .

Anyhow.      .      .

Is   it   Today ?

Is it Right now

at this exact moment

via   a   blog?

Is   it

Virtual?

Did you hear it in a Song Lyric.      .      .

a Headline?

Maybe the truest question is

N O T      W H E N      I S      I T.         .         .

BUT      WHEN      ISN’T      IT ?

Class  is  in  Session.       .       .

All Ways.        .        .

Always.        .         .         . 

Your Mantra

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4a576d4a-da83-449d-9bca-ce83ff2ee0e5

Bill Parcells, Super Bowl, Hall of Fame Coach has a Mantra

that he would strongly encourage his football teams to

adopt:

“D O N ‘ T     E V E R    L E T    G O O D    E N O U G H    B E    G O O D    E N O U G H”

A G R E E

OR

D I S A G R E E ?

New Year’s Day is still a whopping

1     0     8     Days  Away,

so don’t get any ideas about getting crazy and making

r          e          s          o          l          u          t        i          o          n          s

but how about something that’ll last longer than the obligatory

couple of weeks past

January 1 ?

Why not a Mantra?

L E T     G O O D     B E     G O O D     E N O U G H

Seriously.     .     .

There’s something about that simply Manta that spells:

H     A     P     P     I     N     E     S     S

Voltaire once said,

“Don’t   let  the  perfect  be  the  enemy  of  of  the  good.”

I’ve never been accused of being a  perfectionist

but at times I like being close.     .     .

You?

In his book,

THE    PARADOX    OF    CHOICE

Barry Schwartz says there are two kinds of people:

S A T I S F I C E R S

and

M A X I M I Z E R S

SATISFICERS are people who make a decision or take action once their criteria are met.

MAXIMIZERS  want to make the optimal decision–even if they see a bike or a backpack that meets their requirements, they can’t make a decision until they’ve examined every option and done ultra-uber-research and data collecting.

Now the studies suggest that SATISFICERS tend to be

h          a          p          p          i          e          r

than MAXIMIZERS;

Maximizers spend a lot more time and energy to reach a decision, and they’re often anxious about whether they did, in fact, make the  b e s t   c h o i c e

Hmmmmmmmmmmmm of the Day kind of stuff, huh?

So what about a new Mantra?

Last week I was talking to a friend who told me that having adopted this mantra:

LET   GOOD   BE   GOOD   ENOUGH

has literally changed her life.      .        .

Jennifer Kunst, Ph.D seems to agree.

In her book,

WISDOM  FROM  THE  COUCH: KNOWING  AND  GROWING  YOURSELF  FROM  THE INSIDE  OUT 

Dr. Kunst suggests:

“.     .     .by accepting ourselves as enough, we must accept our limitations and the limitations of life itself.  But in doing so, we also gain access to life’s real possibilities.  By forsaking the false path of seeking something bigger and better, we choose a real path that may be smaller but less to a different kind of better.  By choosing to accept ourselves as enough, we choose a better way of being who we already are.     .     .     .”

It’s some  1 0 8  days away from another

New  Year,

why waste another resolution

why waste another moment

when this very instant

when  this  very  n o w

you  can

L E T         G  O  O  D        B  E         G  O  O  D        E  N  O  U  G  H

you

can

personify

h a p p i n e s s

H   A   P   P   Y          N   E   W     life      Y   E   A   R

Has Your MESSAGE Changed?

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Has Your Message Ever Changed?

Not only is

T     I     M     E

moving  at  an  unbelievably

fast  pace,

but so is everything that is attached to

T      I      M      E

like our information .       .       .

Has your Message Ever Changed?

Have what you believed

a year ago.      .      .

five years ago.       .       .

ten years ago.       .       .

fifteen years ago.       .       .

twenty years ago.       .      .

thirty years ago.       .        .

FIFTY years ago.       .       .

S I X T Y-S E V E N     Y E A R S     A G O .     .     .  

still what you    N  O  W    believe

without any shadows of doubt

or

bet-the-farm-

bet-your-own-life

assurance?

It’s amazing what was

B E L I E V E D

K N O W N 

T O U T E D

in 1949

so profoundly factually

has been so significantly been

debunked.      .       .

ever have any thoughts

ever have any feelings

ever have any on-your-children’s lives

S            U            R            E            T            I            E            S

ever evaporate into

a-not-so-thin-puff-of-smoke

H  A  S            Y  O  U  R            M  E  S  S  A  G  E            E  V  E  R            C  H  A  N  G  E  D

.            .            .Should     I T ?

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm  Of   The   Day:

Are You The 9 0 %

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Unknown

Are you included in the 90%

Are you a part of the ever growing

not-so-much-of-a-minority

any longer

group

of the

C         O         U         L         D         A

S         H         O         U         L         D         A

W         O         U         L         D         A

Continent

9 0 %

90%  of the people say they have a major

R          E          G           R            E          T

about something in their lives.          .          .

You?

Regret is the second most frequently mentioned emotion after

l        o        v        e.       .       .

Researchers from Northwestern’s Kellogg School of Management

found that our biggest regrets tend to revolve around

Romance:  18.1%

Family: 15.9%

Education: 13.1%

Career 12.2%

Finance 9.9%

and that we feel the most regret about missed chances:

In the long run, we’re more likely to regret things we didn’t do

than things we

d  i  d     d  o.        .        .   

The   W  H  Y    of   it  all:

“Our ‘psychological immune system’ helps us recover from bad experiences quicker than we assume, thanks to our ability to rationalize and reframe how we see things.   .  .But it’s harder to use these tricks to get over never having tried something in the first place.    .    .    .” 

So.        .        .

what’s a Ninety-percenter to do?

According to Bronnie Ware’s book,

THE  TOP  FIVE  REGRETS  OF  THE  DYING

you’ll be much more satisfied at the end of your life

if   you:

L I V E     A     L I F E     T H A T ‘ S     M O R E     M E A N I N G F U L     T O     Y O U

H A V E     T H E     C O U R A G E     T O     E X P R E S S     Y O U R     F E E L I N G S

S I M P L Y     A L L O W     Y O U R S E L F     T O     B E     H A P P I E R

P R I O R I T I Z E     F A M I L Y     T I M E     O V E R     L O N G     H O U R S     A T     W O R K

S T A Y     I N     T O U C H     W I T H     O L D     F R I E N D S

Maybe Ted Hughes, the British Poet Laureate was right:

“The only thing people regret is that they didn’t live boldly enough, that they didn’t invest enough heart, didn’t love enough.  Nothing else really counts at all.”

Maybe the Chinese Proverb is correct:

If you want to be happy for an hour–take a nap

If you want to be happy for a day–go fishing

If you want to be happy for a month–get married

If you want to be happy for a year–inherit a fortune

If you want to be happy for a lifetime–

H  E  L  P      O T H E R S

Being a Caring Catalyst

not only means giving up a life of regrets

but picking up  o p p o r t u n i t i e s  to

make others happier.     .     .

Hey,

if you want to build skills for a happier life with fun,

science-based  activities and games

then you can click in:

www.happify.com

If you want to begin

at this very moment

become a

Certified  Caring  Catalyst

Uhhhhhhhhh.         .           .

need I say it.           .           .

 need you read it.       .       .

Y   O   U

W   O   N   ‘    T

R    E    G    R    E    T       I    T

A Sewing of Special Oats

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https://youtu.be/eoyq9pcp4Cg

 

What a Grrrreat Video, huh?

W H A T    I F

.      .      .what if you got the chance to do something you’ve always wanted to do.      .      .

but.      .      .

B      U      T,

You had to start  

T             O             D             A             Y–

B E G I N     R I G H T      N O W ?

I love my children intensely.

Most parents do,

no matter what their ages,

conditions,

situations

or willingness to return the same kind of love.

As School has already begun and Summer vacation has come to an abrupt end

My mind has wandered back to

T       H       O       S       E              D       A       Y       S

when we had all five of of our kids under roof at one time during the Summer.

Best Memory:

I would take each one,

by themselves,

out to the Breakfast stop of their choosing.

Not only would they get whatever they wanted for breakfast,

we’d usually hit the Dollar Store

or Thrift Shop

before returning home to the others.

There were no times in my life,

more sacred and precious.

We’d laugh,

joke,

pull stuff on the others at home that they were never suspecting.     .     .

TALK   ABOUT   ALL   OF   THE   OTHERS   AT   HOME,

scheme,

dream,

talk about

‘once upon a time’s

and time’s to come;

they’d listen to their favorite music or radio station during that time;

we’d just be together.      .      .

we would love.

I remember when I was a little kid,

I’d be just a tad jealous when Mother’s and Father’s Day would come around.

Seriously.      .      .

PARENTS    GET    A    DAY,

I’d think. . .?

One time I even asked,

“HOW COME KIDS DON’T GET A DAY?”

.       .       .and I loved the answer:

“BECAUSE    EVERY    DAY    IS    CHILDREN’S    DAY!”

.        .        .these are the things that I initially thought about when I first saw this video.        .        .

B     U     T.        .        .  

the Question:

“WHAT    IF    YOU    GOT    THE    CHANCE    TO    DO    SOMETHING    YOU    ALWAYS    WANTED    TO DO    BUT    YOU    HAD    TO    START    TODAY ?”

Cranked me right between the eyes and thankfully,

sank in much deeper than the outer eye could see

and the inner eye had to examine.

Well.       .       .

what if you got    that    chance?

What if.        .        .

you never got THAT Chance.      .      .

but    manufactured      it      anyway?

Would your life be different,

T    O    M    O    R    R    O    W ?

Hmmmmmm.       .       .

that’s enough to Roll your Oats,

isn’t   it?

Forget letting  THAT  stir something up in you.        .        .

let it be your Life-Long meal

that sustains you again and again and again.          .          .

and.          .          .

feeds others in a way,

they too,

never hunger again!

A   Sewing   of   a   Special   Kind   of   Oats

Bon  appetit!

The Broken Record

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Break any Records, lately.  .  .  ?

According to wire service reports, a New York man has set a record for the most records in

The Guinness Book of World Records

His name is Ashrita Furman, and he is the first person to hold 100 Records at the same time!

Quite a feat, huh?

His Records include a mass poetry reading of the poem

“PRECIOUS”

in a 111 languages,

27,000 jumping jacks in five hours,

Eating 38 M&Ms with chopsticks in one minute. . .

Furman has held 234 total Records, but many have been broken.

He is quoted saying,

“I believe we all have an inner strength that we very rarely use.”

(IS   THAT   RINGING   ANY   BELLS   IN   YOUR   HEAD?. . .FLYING ANY FLAGS UP YOUR POLE?)

He also said,

“I just love the challenge of trying to be the best in the World in something.”

Now it’s true,

we might not have this tremendous yearning to be

THE    BEST

at something. . .

rather than to simply

DOING      OUR      BEST,

we would all probably agree that we have an inner strength we rarely use, though, huh?

So when it comes to

B  R  E  A  K  I  N  G       R  E  C  O  R  D S

maybe the

BROKEN RECORD

that needs dumped is the one that plays over and over and over again and again and again that has that annoying scratch

S             C             R            E             E             C             H             I            N             G

“YOU

ARE

NOT

GOOD

ENOUGH !”

Pssssssssssst:

UN-ACCEPTED   SELVES

UN-ACCEPT   OTHERS

until that

BROKEN RECORD

is ditched.

Lesson of the Day:

Once the Trash is taken to the Curb, Never bring it back into the HOUSE–E V E R !

(Break me THAT record, Batman)

CLEAN SLATED

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https://youtu.be/R45HcYA8uRA

Forgive me. . .

I’ve  got

R          E          G          R          E          T          S

and   u n l i k e

Frank Sinatra’s  MY WAY.   .   .

They are way too  m a n y  to Mention

I,  on purpose,  D I D    N O T  post this on

New Year’s Day

Because that’s always a Universal

C  L  E  A  N     S  L  A  T  E     D  A  Y

B          U          T

The most needed   C L E A N    S L A T E    D A Y

IS  TODAY

or whenever the  REGRET   weighs the heaviest.

.    .   .or turns the  r e a r v i e w   m i r r o r   into a   w i n d s h i e l d

Psssssssst of the Day:

THE  PROBLEM  ISN’T  THAT  WE  DON’T  HAVE  AN  ERASER.     .     .

IT’S  THAT  WE  DON’T  USE  IT !

Every day is a  CLEAN SLATE

.      .      .DO  THE  THINGS  YOU  REGRET

N      O      T          d o i n g

o                    f                   t                    e                    n

It may be tough living with your regrets. . .

but not as rough as  n o t  having the opportunity to make a few more in your life

or harder still.     .     .

 g e t t i n g    c l e a n   s l a t e d

all over again

because our only  p e r f e c t i o n s

are our  i m p e r f e c t i o n s .   .   .   .

Two Buck Chuck

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Well.  .  .

Now you know. . .

Now you know that I didn’t win the 1.6Billion-dollar PowerBall

and I’m fairly sure that no one who happens to have split those winnings three ways, is reading this either.

Now you know.  .  .

maybe what you know,

know that you know,

and bet your life that you know.  .  .

but for the life of you don’t act like you know

or. . .even recognize.

I didn’t fully

until this morning when I, like millions of others, found out that what

W          I          N          N          E          R          S

we really are.

I found out that the odds of winning were about 1 in 292 million, which we are told are to be worse odds of being mauled by a bear and being attacked by a shark and marrying a supermodel–

A L L     C O M B I N E D.

You know what my Two-Bucks bought me?

H O P E :

If you think about it–for two-bucks it’s a great deal, no matter what the odds.  I mean, come on, for just two-bucks, I bought a chance for 1.6 Billion dollars.  That’s a pretty great deal, isn’t it?  H O P E !  It took no skill, no special prayers, I was on equal ground with everyone else without nothing to do or with anyone to compete.

Two-bucks bought me

P E R S P E C T I V E:

The simple experience of playing and actually  l o s i n g  was worth it.  This two-bucks lasted longer than an amusement ride or a movie or a Broadway show; this  p e r s p e c t i v e  lasted for days as we dreamed about how we’d help people and actually change their lives; make dreams that have never been dreamt, come true.  It allowed for friendships and camaraderie and love as I joined other groups at church, at work, in the neighborhood  in buying tickets together; we even commiserated about  how it just wasn’t in the cards  for us to win, and like everyone else who bellied up to that PowerBall Bar, took the chance, anyhow–all that for being Two-Buck-Chuck.

You know what my Two-Bucks really bought me?

I had an awesome conversation with my son last weekend, one of so many other fantastic talks; I found out at in a matter of less than a week we were going to be grandparents to one of our daughters, first daughter, another daughter’s second expected baby, and another daughter’s engagement to be married; I am going to be celebrating thirty fast years of marriage to a woman who said   y e s   when the whole world and mostly myself was screaming,  N     O;  I’ve served four amazing churches in the past 36 years; companioned hundreds of terminally ill patients; supported their families; conducted hundreds of weddings and thousands of funerals; been befriended by people that can’t be created or imagined by Hollywood’s greatest writers.    .    .what’s the price tag on all of that?  Two bucks?  1.6 Billion?

Hmmmmmmmmmm of the DAY:

A L L     O F     T H I S     F O R

t w o   b u c k s.    .    .    .

Two-Buck-Chuck figures the odds of winning some 1.6 Billion dollars don’t stack up to the best two bucks I’ve spent countless times over–especially just right now–that’s gotten me to the point of where

I know. . .

I know that I know. . .

I bet my Life that I know. . .

what for the rest of my life I intend to act

LIKE   I   KNOW

(what’s really precious and priceless)

Y O U ?

It’s great being
W     I     N     N     E     R     S

Two-Buck-Chuck realizes   t h a t

(as do I now hope you do, too)

Facing your F. E. A. R.

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S O . . .

What’s your

F.     E.     A.     R.  ?

F  alse

E  xperience

A  ppearing

R  eal ?

We all have them. . .these F alse  E  xperiences  A  ppearing  R  eal’s . . .

and in many very real, even more very nasty ways they are much more damaging and realistic than our real-life-everyday-fears.

What’s your’s?

Heights?

Snakes?

Spiders?

Dentists?

Doctors?

Hospitals?

Elevators?

Dark Small Places?

Planes?

Germs?

Claustrophobia?

Public Speaking?

C   H   A   N   G   E ?

F   A   I   L   U   R   E ?

S   U   C   C   E   S   S ?

We all have F. E. A.R.’s and it’s never so much what brings us to our knees or even what keeps us there for a seemingly forever. . .

it’s what keeps us

c     r     a     w     l     i     n     g

forward  no matter how slow.   .   .

H          O          W  ?

Hmmmmmmmm of the Day, huh?

Maybe. . .m  a  y  b  e   by just being

A        W        A        R        E

A     Accept the F.E.A.R.  and don’t to ignore or fight it.  .  .

W    Watch the F.E.A.R…just watch it and when you notice it just start breathing longer on your out-breath. . .

A      Act normally. . .carry on as if nothing’s different–that sends a powerful message to the brain that all’s well. . .

R      Repeat those above steps in your mind countless times over if necessary. . .

E      Expect the best always.  One of our greatest feelings in life is that we control F.E.A.R. more than we think. . .

Our F alse  E xperiences  A ppearing  R  eal

are no joke. . .they are as real as our next breath but even just as conquerable as our next few breaths after THAT 

Overcoming these F.E.A.R.’s are never easy. . .

but they’re not impossible, either.

Surmounting them will absolutely give us the

s p a r e     c a p a c i t y

to focus on what you really want to do and be

.    .    .and it takes work

but it’s one rewarding  job.

So what is it?

What’s your

F.     E.     A.     R.  ?

Be  even  just a little more

A.     W.     A.     R.     E.

Going For IT

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This past Monday night, Le’Veon Bell scored a Touchdown against the San Diego Chargers with time running out to win the football game.  Mike Tomlin, the Pittsburgh Steeler coach decided with five seconds left not to be a prisoner of his fears and

THEY   WENT   FOR   IT

Can you imagine how much he. . .they. . .would have been ridiculed if  they  wouldn’t have made the touchdown when they could have easily have tied the score and gone to overtime and taken their chances. . . ?

W          A          I          T .    .    .

You’re not thinking this is about some football story, do you?

It’s about Me.   .   .it’s about You.   .   .   .

When’s the last time

YOU   WENT   FOR   IT ?

I remember when I was playing T-ball. . .

I was about 6 or 7 and I overheard my grandfather talking to maybe my parents or some other family members after one of my games and he said something about T-ball isn’t really baseball and all that I had to do is keep running after I hit the ball because no one could make a good enough throw to get me out.  .  .  .

He was right. . .the only way that anyone could ever get me out, whether I hit the baseball out of the infield or not, was just keep running and only a perfect throw. . .a flawless play could ever get me off the bases.

I can’t remember many times when I just kept running. . .

WHEN    I    WENT     FOR     IT

that I got thrown out. . . .

THE      LESSON :

When you go for it,

the pressure is more on somebody else more than yourself.  .  .

unless

.    .    .you’re the real

S  O  M  E  B  O  D  Y       E  L  S  E

It’s how I ran 8 marathons,

It’s how I self-published RE-MEMBER–A MEMORY BOOK and THE CANDLE MAKER,

It’s how I’ve become a Professional Speaker in the National Speakers Association,

It’s how when I full-steam-ahead-never-look-back-never-say-quit-don’t-take-no-for-an-option-went-for-it

I     N E V E R    F A I L E D. . .

E                   V                E                R  .    .   .   .

So. . .seriously.  .  .

when was the last time you

all-out-chips-in-the-middle-of-the-table-went for it?

When was the last time

you didn’t

FEAR   SUCCESS

more than you

FEAR   FAILURE ?

If you can’t can’t remember

or even if you can recall. . .

even if

especially if

it’s been since you were 6 or 7

or just a few moments ago.    .     .

Pssssssssst of the Day:

IT’S     TOO     LONG

Hmmmmm of the Day:

IT     DOESN’T     HAVE     TO    BE !

Round the Bases. . .don’t stop. . .

GO   FOR   HOME

(YOU’RE    SAFE)

DISCLAIMER:  EVEN THOUGH I KNOW THIS. . .KNOW THAT I KNOW THIS. . .BET MY LIFE THAT I KNOW THIS. . .FOR THE LIFE OF ME. . .I ACT LIKE I DON’T KNOW THIS !

 

Professional Speaker, Author, Assurance Man