The Caring Catalyst

Who Cares - What Matters

Second Looks

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So many, many things can happen in just one simple, significant second.

I almost learned immediately in 1994 when I became a Chaplain for Hospice that folks who were in my care would often use me as a mirror.

I really feel that when we undeniably know that we are NOT going to live forever, that in fact, we’ve all been born with a lethal sexually transmitted disease called, LIFE, that we have very basic, essential fears that set in like a disease itself. A fear like, “What about my appearance? What am I going to end up looking like as DISease DISsembles my body?”

It amazes me how people use US as their mirrors. They don’t have to look in a mirror to see what they look like, they just have to watch our expressions when we walk in the room and see them. Amazing still how it just might not be ‘the sick’ who use the mirror trick.

We all look for recognition and acceptance in the eyes of those who look upon us!

So…be the eye, the camera, the mirror that Accepts, Acknowledges, Affirms, Authorizes another.

What does it take to do so?

How much Money is involved and needs exchanged?

How long does it take?

A Second. . .a simple, sincere second.

Psssssst: Don’t give it a Second Look!

(Give it Always/ALL Ways Unlimited Looks)

Love’s NOT the Greatest Thing

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First time for me in 33 years of Ministry. A double-wedding ceremony.

It took place at the David Simpson Hospice House in Cleveland around 10:15 a.m. on 12/11/13.

Their mother is very sick and is declining rather quickly. “THEY” wanted to do something about as special as a son and a daughter can do for an ailing mother. Take her to a wedding: THEIR’S!

With a small amount of family and friends gathered into The Mediation Room that overlooked an angry Lake Erie on a dishwater gray Winter morning, they wheeled the bed of their mother into that small gathering.

I told them as we began the service, that no matter what Cathedral or highly adorned Sanctuary they’d ever find themselves, it would never be any more sacred than the walls of family and friends that surrounded them right then.

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The UN-Imprisoned Prisoner

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Prisoner No. 46664. Hardly a lucky number, especially since it brought not luck, but lots of hardship and heartache for the 27 years Nelson Mandela wore it as his identity.

Maybe his greatest lesson then, now, and for all of history, is that he indeed was in prison but never imprisoned. Can we truly say that of us?

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Insurance vs. Assurance

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It’s what we seek most in our lives, isn’t it?

A S S U R A N C E.

We may buy Insurance to protect us from financial disaster for crashed cars, burned-down houses, loss of limb or even life. . .but it’s the ASSURANCE of each of these things, the great ‘what-ever’ it is we deem to be LIFE that we ultimately seek.

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Feeder Goldfish ‘DO IT’

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It was purely a chance meeting–If there truly is such a thing.

Michelle Brown is a Team-Leader at Hospice of the Western Reserve. We ran into each other and after asking how we were doing and the recent Thanksgiving Holiday, she paused and then with a tear in her eye that was half-twinkle she told me about feeder goldfish. Hmmmmm…where can this possible go, right?

How about a Direct Hit to the Heart!

She told me that she and her husband didn’t go out and buy expensive, exotic fish, but ‘RESCUED’ feeder goldfish, who in this case weren’t in the greatest shape. They had somehow caught some kind of disease, that not only seemed to be killing them, one by one, but actually with fish parts falling off, were seemingly dying painfully.

In fact, just when she thought she was exceedingly adding to their suffering and was about to euthanize them she noticed something. . .something quite remarkable. The goldfish that were in the worst shape were actually being nurtured, by those who were in less bad shape. She stated that she saw how they would take turns, literally siding up besides the sickest and showing an overwhelming amount of compassion as they provided, dare I state it: PRESENCE!

Absurd?

I once saw two squirrels chasing one another and one inadvertently had run onto the street and got hit by a car even though it swerved to miss it. The car didn’t stop. I did. I actually saw the squirrel that was chasing the one now hit and killed, ran into the street and pull it off the road. I was paralyzed.

I’m sure there’s some YouTube/Google-ifric posts that would verify even much greater ANIMAL acts of Compassion.

Michelle wondered out loud about the WHY of it all…was she doing more harm than good, even though her intention was quite the opposite?

We then both wondered, maybe IT was to Teach. . .Teach her The Lesson, to Teach me the Lesson, to Teach You The Lesson, for you to Teach others The Lesson. . .I mean, isn’t that Life at it’s best and how it’s been handed down, benefited and handed down again?

It’s all about this Compassionate Presence isn’t it?

Maybe what SHOUTED OUT to me the Loudest is, if a Feeder Goldfish can show that kind of compassionate presence to one of it’s own, suffering and dying, then. . .then what about Me–You–Others?

Hmmmmmm for $10,000.00, Alex

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WARNING: G R A T I T U D E ALERT!

IF Thanksgiving is all about family gathers and feasts upon feasts that last entire weekends. . .

IF Thanksgiving is all about huge football rivalries that have you sitting on the edge of your chairs…

IF Thanksgiving is all about Pilgrims and Indians re-enactment of cute plays with moral meanings…

IF Thanksgiving is all about Gray Thursdays, Black Friday’s Pewter Saturdays, Cyber Mondays. . .

IF Thanksgiving is all about short vacations and getting out of work and school. . .

IF Thanksgiving is all about fine wine, cocktails, the first of holiday parties. . .

IF Thanksgiving is all about leftovers. . .

THEN IT IS O V E R!

But. . .

IF Thanksgiving is all about Gratitude. . .

Then it hasn’t begun. . .

Then it hasn’t concluded. . .

Then it HAS only C O N T I N U E D!

Pass me a Slice of Sincerity and a Cup of Compassion and let us proceed on the Gratitude Trail picking up others along The Way. . . .

http://thecaringcatalyst.com/224/

Spelling C-O-M-P-A-S-S-I-O-N

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So often we don’t think COMPASSION is an Inside Job or our Responsibility–It’s Someone Else’s job or at least their turn and it’s something, at the least, just mystically happens.

WRONG!

It doesn’t matter if it’s Health Care, or Education or Politics, or the Arts. It doesn’t matter what Gender or age or weight or height. Compassion is more than a Feeling or even a glancing high-tech Touch.

Enough!

Sympathy says, “I’m sorry,”

Compassion Yells, “HOW CAN I HELP?”

Studies actually show that when we feel most in tune with another, even our autonomic nervous systems join a in a harmonious rhythm.

Compassion is more than a “Good Thing.” “A Nice thing to do” “A Good way to be.”

Our world has never been in more need of this one simple, consistent Act as it is right now.

Compassion is the least expensive, less evasive, most powerful non-pharmological means to actually change, heal, complete another’s life.

You really want to know how to spell C-O-M-P-A-S-S-I-0-N?

It’s this simple: Y-O-U!

Y O U have the ability to not only enhance and actually change a life. . .but actually SAVE ONE!

Now! Do this now!

Even reading this has wasted precious time for Someone you can help with a word, a deed, a look, a smile, a touch, a hand attached to an arm you could drape around a shoulder and hug a little closer.

Y-O-U. . .”The Answer!”

What Gets You In The Barrel?

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June 30, 1859…check that date! A little before any of us could ever read or write a Post, huh?

June 30, 1859 was the day that Charles Blondin tight-roped himself across Niagara Falls. He crossed it about five times, way before Nik Walenda did back on June 16, 2012 WITH A SAFETY TETHER!

Blondin said, “To cross the roaring waters became the ambition of my life.”

Now crossing the Falls, Safety Tether or not is a feat. Blondin made it seem simple..he just didn’t cross it, uhhh, NO! He owned it. He crossed it once, NORMAL. Once on a bike. Another time on stilts. He crossed it pushing a stove in a wheelbarrow and actually cooked an omelet and then, are you ready for this, he crossed it with a man on his shoulders! When asking the crowd who would take on such a dare, only one was heard to volunteer. Harry Colcord, Blondin’s manager took the ride.

Absolutely amazing.

If we were living and in the surrounding area, I have to believe we would have been there with each feat Mr. Blondin performed, if for no other reason just in the chance he would have fallen to his death as we “Ohhhhhh” and “Ahhhhhhed” with his each step and challenging feats.

Question:

As we would have stood on either side of the Falls, cheering, jeering and omelet, er, egging him on, would you have ever been tempted to get in the wheelbarrow and be pushed across by him?

Seriously what would have gotten you into the barrel? Fame? Money? Death Wish? Ambition? Notoriety? What would have made you go all Harry Colcord and accept the challenge, take the risk?

What makes you go ALL IN on anything? When’s the last time you went all in, on YOU?

Hmmmmmm…maybe the THAT’S the biggest question? Not, What gets you in the barrel, but WHAT KEEPS YOU IN?

No nets. No tether. No crowds. No promise of riches or fame.

Just You. . .and IT!

See you on THE OTHER SIDE!

I Believe / I Know

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What’s the big deal? What’s the Difference?

I Believe! I Know!

Semantics?

There’s never a time I stand before an audience; never a time I walk into a patient’s room; never a time I walk into a facility; never a time when I’m one-on-one with a person and not with all of my heart believe that I’m the absolute BEST PERSON to be there! I believe it with all my might, strength, heart, my whole life–I Believe it!

Egotistical?

As much as I Believe it with my whole Being. . .I KNOW it’s not true. . . .

And that, that’s my greatest source of motivation every day, in every situation.

Unblinkingly, may IT ever be so!

Fix You

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Is there a worse feeling, EVER?

You want to help, but there seemingly is nothing you can do. No word to speak, no phrase to utter, no deed to do, no wish to be granted. A painful helplessness. Terrible.

But all is not lost. There’s the absolute one thing, maybe the only thing that’s better than any prescription, therapy, intervention, or experiment.

YOU. Just You. Your Presence. Not your words. Not your deeds. Not your, “There, there’s. . . .”

Just YOU.

Show up and watch the healing take place!

It’s the most curing, the most compassionate, caring thing you can ever share.

You! Show up! Watch the healing begin. . .and forget to end!

Professional Speaker, Author, Assurance Man