The Caring Catalyst

Who Cares - What Matters

OFF THE TRACKS

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We always seem to be looking for the way.          .          .

or at least a new way,

A R E N ‘ T     W E ?

A path.          .          .

 In search of some wild and promiseful destinations.          .        .

And what do we find?

Just exactly  W H E R E   do our searches take us.          .          ?

What discoveries have we made when we set off for such a destination?

Could it be true

Is it even vastly possible

That maybe the greatest destinations

The greatest journeys

Are not those that we’ve set out for;

not those that we have tried to be in search of;

B                    U                    T

P E R H A P S

J U S T     M A Y B E

P O S S I B L Y

The ones that took us to a place

we absolutely had no idea

we had no way of knowing

we had no intention of going

And  yet  F O U N D

r       e       c       e       i       v       e       d

what we could’ve never gotten

 any other way

from any other place

or any other person.          .          .

Now that’s the

A          D          V          E          N          T          U          R          E

of life

and living

if it teaches us nothing else

it most surely must educate us to the possibility

that some of our best lessons

are those we never signed up

 and learned anyway just by going

O     F     F          T     R     A     C     K

C H O O  — C  H  O  O

AAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL     AAAAAAAA  —  B      O      A      R      D

Cha-Cha-Cha-CHILLING

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Muriel de Seze—Getty Images
 BRIAN O’CONNOR is a professor of philosophy at University College Dublin and the author of Idleness: A Philosophical Essay.     .     .
And he has some really interesting things to say about
plain-ordinary-kick-back-put-your-feet-and-don’t-do-a-thing-NOTHINGNESS

From the age of Enlightenment onward, philosophers, political leaders and moral authorities of many kinds have tried to convince us that work is one of the most important opportunities for freedom. Through work, we can become a somebody, relish the esteem we gain, structure our lives and, while we are at it, contribute nobly to the common good. This is a strange brew of ideas, but one that has seeped deeper into our psyche than we may realize.           .          .

R         E         S         O         N         A         T         E  ?

We develop a craving for recognition that is rarely satisfied. We need to be seen and admired, pushed along by a narcissism that doesn’t really believe in itself, but doesn’t know how to stop. We depend on the approval of strangers with needs of their own. Self-satisfaction proves elusive. If we are lucky enough to accomplish one thing, another seemingly compelling challenge — or even just an after-hours email — steps in to give us a new worry.

The ever-tightening connection between our work and our personal identity constricts even more. We come to believe that being idle at all is, somehow, the antithesis of freedom. But we would do well to think about idleness more, and rather differently from how we do.

Leisure today is, for many people, a glimpse at what it would be like to do nothing for more than a few hours. It is — or at least it used to be — downtime, lazing away, forgetting the bothers of the workplace. We use our allowance of paid vacation to recharge the batteries, address some level of emotional well-being… and gear up for a return to work. Leisure, in this way, is incorporated into the world of work. It is not a subversion of it.

H E A D Y     S T U F F,  huh?

And this is how many want it to be. Doing nothing at all, the thought goes, is good up to a point. But over-doing nothing is boring. In that light, modern work practices look just right. They respect, one might naively think, our natural moderate desire for idleness — paid vacation time — and the deeper need to keep ourselves busy.

It was not always this way. In 1963, the German writer Heinrich Böll published a fictional story of a visitor to a small fishing village somewhere in the West of Europe. His visitor carries with him the full conviction of the work ethic. Spotting an apparently lazy local fisherman resting in his boat, the visitor asks impatiently why the man doesn’t spend more time fishing, catching more, eventually building a lucrative multi-vessel business. With that effort, he could hope to work his way towards time away from work. It falls to the simple but not so naive fisherman to point out the irony of that recommendation. With no pressure to make something of himself, the fisherman is free — enviably so. He has what many seek: his own idle time. He has it by default. His circumstances may have been remarkably fortunate, yet Böll’s story captures a recognizable time when work was considered a necessary evil, second in value to other goods like friendship, rest and community.

It may be unrealistic to believe we could return to a world like that. And there are dangers of wishful thinking in believing such a world was ever successful in meeting the fundamental range of human needs — our emotional, material and intellectual needs. Our unqualified belief in progress especially affords it little credibility. There is nothing commendable about leaving all work to others, or in pretending that no level of work is essential to survival. Economic precariousness is not just dangerous to one’s health but also psychologically draining. (It is telling that a common perception of people out of work or down on their luck — that they are lazy — is infected with the supposed moral virtue of busyness.) In society today, we cannot forget these facts — and realize that it will be difficult to decouple ourselves from our deep socialization as useful workers.          .             .

W        A        I        T.            .            .W        H        A        T    ?

Great philosophers have argued that we have nothing to learn from ways of life that exists outside the busy world of western civilization. But if we have some hunch that the world we have today demands too much effort in return for too little happiness, we could do worse than to see what we can learn from those other forms of living. The potential in idleness for greater freedom seems worth the exploration. Or at least an attempt to think about what prevents us from truly doing nothing right now.          .          .

R          E          M          E          B          E          R :

BURN OUT sometimes happen NOT when you put too many logs on the Fire, but when you remove THEM ALL, or too many.          .          .

JUST    MAKE    SURE    THEY    ARE    THE    RIGHT    LOGS

and  B U R N

Warmer

and  B  U  R  N

Brighter

P          E          A           C          E

comes   in   many   forms   and   in   many   ways

BUT  IT  COMES
(if  you  let  it)

Your Caring Catalyst S E L F

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Q          U          E          S          T          I          O          N :

Would you describe yourself as a compassionate person?

Even if you don’t necessarily see yourself that way, I bet you’re compassionate at least some of the time (e.g. when you’re well rested and not in a hurry), or with certain people in your life (e.g. with your closest friends). Compassion can be thought of as a mental state or an orientation towards suffering (your own or others’) that includes these four components:

  • Bringing attention or awareness to recognizing that there is suffering (cognitive)
  • Feeling emotionally moved by that suffering (affective)
  • Wishing there to be relief from that suffering (intentional)
  • A readiness to take action to relieve that suffering (motivational)

Contrary to what many may believe, compassion is considered to be like a muscle that, as any other, can be strengthened with relevant exercises—or can deteriorate and atrophy. In other words, your capacity for compassion can expand, if you choose.

You likely never learned in school that you can intentionally strengthen inner skills such as compassion. The good news is that there are specific habits that you can practice in order to begin honing your abilities to expand compassion for yourself and for others.

 Try the Research-Tested Compassion Practices

Preliminary research from a variety of randomized controlled trials suggests that compassion can, in fact, be enhanced through systematic training programs. For example, the eight-week compassion cultivation training (CCT) course that was developed by Thupten Jinpa, Ph.D. and colleagues at Stanford University’s Center for Compassion and Altruism Research and Education, suggests that adults can indeed improve compassion for themselves, and reduce fear of compassion for themselves and for others.

Compassion is considered to be like a muscleYour capacity for compassion can expand, if you choose.     .     .

Even if you don’t or can’t take a research-validated training program, there are numerous ways to build your compassion muscle—many of which are described on Greater Good in Action (GGIA), the GGSC’s library of science-based practices. Some of these practices involve meditation, such as loving-kindness. Others are writing exercises, such as one that asks you to describe a time when you felt a strong bond with another person.

Many of the practices in both GGIA and the structured training programs range from 10-30 minutes in length. As with most exercises, the more you do them, the more you will likely reap the benefits. However, something is better than nothing. For example, if your physical exercise goal is to take 10,000 steps a day and you only take 3,000, that’s still better for your health than taking none.

Meditation is similar. . .not one of my favorites because of my MONKEY MIND but while the intention may be 20-30 minutes of daily compassion meditation, some practice is better than no practice—and you are maintaining your intention and routine, which will only increase the likelihood of your continuing this intention and routine the next day. Notice if this ‘all-or-nothing’ mentality with your compassion practice is hindering you and see if you can test the ‘something is better than nothing’ theory.

 Try Informal Compassion Practices

While there’s lots of research supporting those kinds of compassion-cultivating practices, there’s also a place for informal, moment-to-moment practices throughout the day.

For example, you could notice when compassion comes easily or spontaneously for you throughout the day (e.g. watching the evening news). You could notice when you resist acknowledging or being with suffering (your own or others’) throughout the day (e.g. when passing someone on the street who is asking for money or an extended family member who is challenging). Throughout the day, you could notice when you judge or minimize suffering (e.g. saying that it doesn’t count or is insignificant compared to someone else or something else going on in the world). We often notice suffering (our own and that of others) but quickly dismiss it and thus do not allow ourselves to be emotionally touched or moved by the suffering (the second component of compassion). This kind of awareness of the presence, or absence, of compassion can provide some valuable information to you.

Loving-kindness meditationLoving-kindness meditation is a practice for developing compassion for self and others.

So, the next time you’re standing in line at the grocery store, instead of looking down at your phone or watching how quickly the surrounding lines are moving (I’m guilty of both), take a moment to consider the common humanity of the people who made your grocery trip possible—the people who grew the food, transported the food, and stocked the shelves, or even the cashier who is about to help you. Perhaps you could take a moment of appreciation for each of them.

If you choose, this could be an opportunity to acknowledge the interdependence that surrounds us. Our lives, even simple trips to the grocery store, are supported by countless others.

 Set an Intention

Renowned meditation teacher Jack Kornfield once wrote that setting one’s intention is like setting the compass for one’s heart. Our intention helps guide our efforts to be compassionate and helps remind us why we are choosing to set time aside for compassion-cultivating practices. When I teach compassion, I pose questions for my students, such as these:

  • What is bringing you to the practice today?
  • What do you want for yourself?
  • What do you want for your life?
  • What do you have to offer the world?

While these are indeed ‘big’ questions, asking them allows us to ponder our intentions of why we are trying to strengthen our inner skill of compassion.

For a week, try setting an intention before you start your compassion meditation practice and notice whether this intention helps clarify your purpose. At times, this intention can come up again throughout the day as a means of renewing your commitment to practice compassion, even when you are living life ‘off the cushion.’

The power of intentionsSetting an intention is like setting the compass for one’s heart.

 Collect Your own Data

Research is probabilistic. Just because something works for most people (or people in research studies) does not mean that it will work for you. As I always tell folks in during my presentations, in order to get the most convincing data, “Be your own laboratory.”

Run a short experiment (e.g., a couple weeks or a couple months) and collect your own data. Do you feel more compassionate (towards yourself, loved ones, strangers, difficult people) when utilizing formal (e.g., sitting meditation) and informal (e.g., silently reciting loving-kindness phrases to yourself while waiting in line at Trader Joe’s) compassion practices?

Do your own compassion studyDo you feel more compassionate when utilizing formal and informal compassion practices?

Running this experiment does not require a workbook, purchasing a fancy meditation cushion, or buying trendy new yoga clothes. These practices, which are thousands of years old, can be done right in the comfort of your own home, at the office, in your car, or really anywhere, just as you are. Afterward, reflection can take many forms—and you should adopt one that works for you.

Get  Support

This may be the most easiest…TAKE A CLASS…or just go one on one with an instructor who can answer your questions or help troubleshoot and problem-solve with you and most importantly, an instructor will help you stick with and come back to this practice and help make it a habit, a lifestyle.     .     .

Many others are choosing to acknowledge suffering (their own and others’) and wish to see the relief of suffering. This notion can get lost at times when doing these practices in solitude.

If you don’t have the time or money for a class, don’t despair. You might find support at a religious community or center in your area, if you have one. If you don’t, enlist a friend or relative to support your effort to make compassion more of a habit—someone who can encourage and remind you to stay on track and help you (non-judgmentally) troubleshoot the times when you just don’t feel very compassionate in the midst of suffering.

 Be Open to Possibilities—and Compassionate toward Yourself

There are lots of good reasons why sometimes we intend to do compassion meditation practices, and yet, for whatever reason, we drop the ball. Often, what people do when this happens is engage in ‘negative self-talk’ by implicitly or explicitly saying things to themselves, such as “I never stick with anything”; “I’m a failure”; or “I can’t do this.” Interestingly, there’s no empirical evidence to suggest that beating ourselves up will actually help us change our behavior; in fact, some data suggests that this type of criticism can move us away from our goals, rather than towards them.

Support in cultivating compassionGet support from a group, family member or friend to make compassion more of a habit.

Additionally, one of the interesting opportunities that arises when we do not do our compassion meditation practices is to see if, in that moment, we can practice compassion for ourselves. Compassion for missing the compassion practice is essentially one of the ‘tests’ of our practice. When we’re tempted to be harsh, critical, and judgmental with ourselves, can we instead choose to have compassion: acknowledging our suffering, noting how this makes us human and that we are not alone, and trying to be gentle or kind with ourselves (or at least refrain from beating ourselves up—’if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all’)?

Often the story that gets told about meditation is that it will be ‘relaxing,’ ‘stress-relieving,’ and ‘blissful.’ While all of these experiences are possible, for many people the experience with meditation or compassion practices is the exact opposite of peaceful, relaxing, and positive. For some, depending on the practice, just focusing on one’s breath can bring about extreme anxiety or worry thoughts, bringing to mind a loved one can bring about grief and loss, imagining oneself as a young child can bring about sadness or pain, considering the suffering of all beings may bring about guilt or overwhelm.

It is important to notice whether we are bringing any expectations to the compassion practice. Often people will say that the compassion practices are not ‘working.’ When we investigate what they mean by this, they are often referring to the experience of not feeling relaxed after the meditation. While relaxation and stress relief can be the goal of some meditations, in general this is not the case with compassion meditation. Compassion is ultimately about suffering, which can at times feel difficult to sit with.

Compassion is ultimately about sufferingCompassion is ultimately about suffering, which can be uncomfortable.

Finally, people often bring the expectation that because a compassion practice generated a certain feeling or experience before (e.g., yesterday or last week), it ‘should’ or will generate a similar feeling or experience today. FACT: reality is constantly changing (time is passing and the Earth is rotating as you read this), and thus it is a bit of a fallacy to expect that we, and the practice, will be the same day in and day out. Because the practice is different every day, we have something ‘new’ to reflect on after each practice.

It may simply be the case that the activities aren’t right for you. If loving-kindness doesn’t seem to be increasing your compassion, try something else, like writing about a time when you felt like someone showed compassion toward you, or a time when you felt spontaneous compassion for another. It is important to be open to another possibility: perhaps compassion practices aren’t what you need right now. The good news is that there are many varieties of different contemplative practices available that can help you to become more present and non-judgmental.

Establishing new habits takes time. Be patient and keep trying. One day, you might find yourself more open to suffering—and more capable of addressing it—than you’ve ever been before.      .      .

PRETTY  HEADY  STUFF.     .     .     ?

Here’s the Skinny:

We are all

C  O  M  P  A  S  S  I  O  N  A  T  E        B  E  I  N  G  S

who can grow into greater

C  O  M  P  A  S  S  I  O  N  A  T  E       B  E  I  N  G  S
(much easier than you’d think)

Want the ultimate bare bones version:

Questions, Class?

 

The PROOF is in the GIVING

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Our Brains Are Wired To Give…

“Suppose you could be hooked up to a hypothetical “experience machine” that, for the rest of your life, would stimulate your brain and give you any positive feelings you desire. Most people to whom I offer this imaginary choice refuse the machine. It is not just positive feelings we want: we want to be entitled to our positive feelings.” — Dr. Martin Seligman

In 2014, a study led by neuroscientist Molly J. Crocket shed light on how much humans care about others relative to themselves. The results were surprising. They showed that, on average, people were willing to pay twice as much money to prevent someone else receiving an electric shock than the amount of money they would pay to prevent receiving the same amount of shock themselves.

At first, the conclusions seem puzzling. How does this fit with our survival bias, our innate sense of self-protection in the face of danger? A little experiment may help us understand this apparent contradiction.

In the next few days, do the following two things:

  1. Something fun.
  2. Something altruistic.

Plan both events and write about how you think doing those two different acts will make you feel. Then, immediately after completing the two activities, write down how you actually feel. At the end of the day, write down how you feel again, long after both events happened.

More likely than not, the high of doing something fun will last for a little bit and then fade away. It is a satisfaction that consumes itself shortly after the activity ends. If you go to the cinema and you enjoyed the movie, you will feel good after leaving the premises, but you won’t carry that feeling much longer after that.

However, if you perform a random act of kindness the feeling-good effect will endure for hours after the event happened. Try helping someone who can’t help you back; do it anonymously, or listening to someone in need. Or donating to a cause you truly believe in. The positive feelings stemming from the altruistic act will last for a long time after the event happened.

… And Positive Psychology Knows Why

Positive psychology is the field behind the scientific theory of happiness. Not so long ago, psychology focused only on helping troubled minds go back to a healthy state; Patients suffering from depression and other mental disorders. It sought to bring these patients back from “-10 to 0” on the well-being scale.

Positive psychology, on the other hand, looks to answer the question “what can make a healthy mind thrive?”. It looks scientifically into how we can go from “0 to +10” on the well-being scale. The father of positive psychology is Dr. Martin Seligman, author of books like “Authentic Happiness” and “Learned Optimism” and the founder of the Positive Psychology Center at the University of Pennsylvania.

After years of research, he came up with 5 core pillars that act as the infrastructure to our psychological well-being and happiness. It is called the PERMA model:

  • P for Positive Emotion: feeling good, optimism, pleasure and enjoyment.
  • E for Engagement: doing fulfilling work, having exciting hobbies, immersing oneself in a sense of “flow”.
  • R for Relationships: deep social connections, love, intimacy, emotional and physical interaction with others.
  • M for Meaning: having a purpose in life.
  • A for Accomplishment: setting and pursuing goals, realizing your ambition, living with a sense of achievement.

You can experience all of these in a single act of giving, whether it’s sharing a meal with a friend or donating a large sum to a good cause.

Why   Giving   Fulfills   Us

Giving adds to our lives in many different ways, but is also exactly in line with the PERMA model.

  • When we give, we generate positive emotions. This, among other things, triggers a physical reaction: the release of dopamine. This hormone is secreted by the brain and regulates pleasure. It also helps us create habits by stimulating the repetition of the activity that brought us pleasure in the first place, over and over again.
  • Giving also helps us make our relationships more engaging. It enhances the quality of our interactions with others. To receive the appreciation of someone we have just helped is not only rewarding at an individual level, but also a powerful way to cement our social bond with that person.

However, giving goes well beyond facilitating positive emotions or better interactions with others. It can become a profound driver of our success in life, by contributing directly to the meaning and accomplishment components of the PERMA model.

Giving   As   Purpose

In “Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance” by Penn’s psychologist Angela Duckworth, I learned about Kat Cole. Cole started her career waitressing at Hooters while finishing her high school. She later rose up to become vice president of the company at age 26. Today, Kat Cole is Group President of Focus Brands, an investor, humanitarian and advisor.

Here’s her attitude on giving:

“By doing good for just one person, in just one moment, you can affect the trajectory of many things, of many lives, all over the world. Even if in some situations it’s not easy to be kind, gracious or positive, keep in mind it’s not just that moment that you are affecting, it’s many moments into the future.”

She differentiates between productive achievers and destructive achievers. As per her own description in a recent interview:

“There are a lot of people who have been incredibly successful by the typical person’s definition, financially or in terms of career acceleration, but have done it destructively, by not lifting others up and bringing them along. Then there are those who have been productive achievers, who have also brought others along with them and made a difference.”

For Cole, her giving attitude implied raising others and bringing them along in her path towards growth. A deep sense of purpose, rooted on an abundance mentality, had a significant impact on her professional success.

Happiness has to be earned. It cannot be chased. It cannot be manufactured. Happiness is about the consistency of our daily actions with our principles. The way we respond to the daily demands of life. In that context, a virtuous circle of gratitude and giving — as proven by positive psychology, the science of happiness — becomes a critical element of a fulfilling life.

And now.      .       . THE  BIG  Sooooooooooo:

Psssssssssssssssssssssssssst:

LIFE is not a zero-sum game. An abundance mindset is both possible and practical. Science has shown our brains are wired to give because they prolong positive emotions from such interactions. Positive Psychology confirms this and gives us a model we can use to become productive achievers: PERMA.

It always comes back to one simple question:
Do you have a Caring Catalyst Heart.        .        .
There’s only one way to truly answer:
G     I     V     E            I     T

E M B A R R A S S E D

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What’s your most embarrassing moment?

Can you share it and not still feel embarrassed?

How many people know about this most embarrassing moment you’ve ever had?

 Who is involved in it.          .          .

Who sought out this most embarrassing incident you ever had.       .        .

 I always thought it was when I filed for bankruptcy;

 when I got a divorce;

when I got fired from a job;

when I failed a test and was called out in front of the whole 6th grade class;

 when I wasn’t able to show up more times than not to one of my kids or grandkids activities;

 when I said the wrong hurtful thing in front of a crowd

 at my student church when I had a Huge Freudian slip and directed peoples attention to the beautiful CENTERFOLD on the piano instead of the floral CENTERPIECE PIECE;

T           R           U           T           H.           .           .

When I saw this video I became embarrassed.          .           .

I became embarrassed

because I’ve had the biggest lead in my life

and I don’t know that I’ve done much with it.          .          .

or as much as I absolutely could have done

W  I  T  H    I  T;

especially when compared to others

I’ve been light years ahead because of

M  Y       P  R  I  V  I  L  E  G  E

F               A               C             T :

I can’t think of one thing

that would be more embarrassing

literally for the rest of my life:

After seeing this small clip not been different because of it or worse living differently

Y   o   u.             .             .

Are you embarrassed,

even slightly

because, like me,

you’ve gotten this tremendous head start

and not done as much as you could/would/should have.          .          .

L  I  K  E    M  E

it doesn’t make us better RACERS

It doesn’t make us more Competitive

It doesn’t make us more Hall of Fame Champions

It  just  makes  me  Embarrassed;

Even more Embarrassed

if  it  comes  across

P            R            E            A            C            H           Y

because’s there a Scripture at the end

THAT EVERY MAJOR RELIGION

and all the minor Ones 

e s p o u s e:

L O V E      O N E     A N O T H E R
I  N     W O R D,   T A L K,    I N    D E E D,   A N D     I N    T R U T H

Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.          .          .

doesn’t    that     apply    to    all    of    us.       .       .

or   is   it   too

E         M         B         A         R         R         A         S         S         I         N         G

t o    a d m i t

?

IT MAKES YOU THINK

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https://youtu.be/MWBFbYZxiBw

I love the story of a man who died and went to Heaven.          .          .

When he arrives at the Pearly Gates,

Saint Peter asks him just one simple question:

“HOW  DID  YOU  ENJOY  HEAVEN?”

Psssssssssssssssssssssssssssssst:

D   O   N  ‘  T        W   A   I   T

Not one of us can

A  D  D

another Day to our Lives.          .          .

but there’s also not a

Single ONE of US

that can’t

I       N       C       R       E       A       S       E

more LIFE to any Day

W  E      L  I  V  E.          .          .

D          O          N   ‘   T          

W          A          I          T

HARDWIRING HAPPINESS

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It’s always one of the most important questions.          .        .

but not as important as

T H E    A N S W E R:

A   R   E        Y   O   U       H   A   P   P   Y

Seriously.          .         .

ARE  YOU MORE

 Eeyore or Pooh.       .       .

 Rocky or Mr T

 Beauty or The Beast

Cop or Robber

Sweet or Sour

Hot or Mild

Mountain or Valley

It seems, doesn’t it

that at times we have a fantastic pull

to ignore the good in life

and focus instead on the bad.          .          .

E  N  T  E  R       R  I  C  K       H A N S O N

He’s a psychologist who wrote a book a few years ago:

HARDWIRING  HAPPINESS

His   main   thesis   is   this:

Humans’ hardwired tendency is to go negative.  It’s whats allowed our ancestors to survive.  And for depression-prone folks, this proclivity to see the glass half empty is even worse.  To mitigate that negativity  bias, we need to “RE-WIRE” our brains for resilience and happiness.  You do this by taking a few seconds throughout the day to think about and really soak in the good stuff you have going in your life.  It’s basically a form of cognitive behavioral therapy, but it’s incredibly easy to do and the results are powerful.     .     .     .

It’s tough being a Caring Catalyst 

but it’s not always the achieving or the maintaining of being

a Caring Catalyst 

that’s  so  important

so much as the attempt

so much as the intention

so much as the overall consistency

that’s significant.          .           .

So even when you’re feeling more like Eeyore

P   O   O   H        U   P

and realize that even on Cloudy

OVER CAST DAYS

the Sun still shines

.          .          .especially if you let it shine through you;

THINK   ON   THAT

DOING WHAT YOU LOVE

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R  U  T      R  H  O

 Do What You Love?

Or, Love What You Do?

David Sturt and Todd Nordstrom , CONTRIBUTOR Opinions expressed by Forbes Contributors are their own, reported back on March 13, 2015 some pretty eye-opening stuff all of us who hold burning candles at both ends and in the middle 
NEED   TO   TAKE   NOTICE

Since some of the earliest writings from the world’s most prolific thought leaders the notion of doing what you love (seeking a career that fills you with passion) has been discussed at length. But with current research showing how many people are disengaged, dissatisfied, and frustrated at work, we wondered is it possible to flip the words—is it possible to simply love what you do—your current job?

Q        U        I        C        K:

ARE   YOU   LOVING   WHAT   YOU   ARE   DOING 

RIGHT  HERE

RIGHT  NOW

ON  APRIL 11, 2018.          .          .?

Finding a job you love is age-old advice. Confucius probably has the best longstanding quote about “do what you love.” His words, “Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life,” have been repeated throughout history. Or consider Warren Buffett’s words, “Take a job that you love.” And let’s not forget the prolific thoughts of Maya Angelou who said “…pursue the things you love doing and then do them so well that people can’t take their eyes off of you.”

Does anyone advocate the opposite approach—telling people to love what they do? We did not have to look far to find the advice of Steve Jobs who said, “The only way to do great work is to love what you do.”

Image courtesy of shutterstock.com

Image courtesy of shutterstock.com

 Curious about our own experiences in the workplace, we began reviewing previous job titles we have had over the years. Between the two of us, we’ve held titles like: fire inspector, market research manager, disk jockey, product development director, wind surfing instructor, creative director, and the list goes on. As we discussed our roles, we couldn’t help but talk about the positions we loved, and those we knew weren’t the perfect fit. And apart from one position (we won’t admit who it was) of company mascot, which consisted of wearing a fuzzy cow suit and dancing down parade routes in the middle of summer, we loved each of the jobs we had (the cow suit was extremely hot, it was ridiculous, but pardon the pun, ‘Holy cow it was fun’).

Are we typical of most workers? Science actually gives us some insight.

The “find a job you love” advice listed above is easy to buy into for those who love their jobs. But for those who still don’t love their work, should they quit their current job and chase the dream of the job they would love? Or can people learn to find meaning and success in their current job? The answer is ‘yes.’ And here’s why.

Kind of makes
Burning the Candle at both ends and in the middle
take another a whole different perspective
ESPECIALLY  WHEN  YOU  KNOW
THE   SOURCE

S A U N T E R I N G

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Have you done it lately.        .       .

S          A          U          N          T          E          R          E          D

I  just  complete a few days of doing that along the Florida coastline

from Clearwater to Tarpon Springs

I   S A U N T E R E D.          .          .

My knees no longer let me run

My knees no longer let me walk great distances

Q      U      I      C      K      L      Y

So  now  I

s       a       u       n       t       e       r

and I’ve got to tell you

Seaside Sauntering is my absolute favorite

Henry David Thoreau, in an essay on walking,

explained the origin of the word

s     a     u     n     t     e     r

He says the term comes from the Middle Ages

when wandering pilgrims would beg for alms

to finance their journey to

“la   saint   terre”

“T H E       H O L Y       L A N D”

I can’t overwhelming vouch for the origin of the word

but I’m more and more understanding Thoreau’s  theory is in doubt,

but I do like his explanation better than any I’ve heard

because more and more

I’m becoming a

S        A        U        N        T        E        R        E        R

a      true      W a n d e r i n g      W O N D E R E R

who needs to wander

and wonder

a little bit more than what I have.          .        .

Let’s hear it for true sauntering.          .          .

My dictionary tells me the word

“as  to  wander  or  walk  about  idly  and  in  the  leisurely  or  lazy  manner;  to lounge; to  stroll; to  loiter”

W     H     O     A

I’m  not  so  sure  that’s  100%  me  yet

or  if  I  would  like  it  to  be  bigger  percentage  of  me.        .        .

 a loiterer

in no particular hurry

taking time to see the world around me

sampling it along the way.          .          .

Not a whole lot of people saunter about these days.          .          .

Everyone seems to be in a hurry

to get to somewhere

and do something

running off to this meeting

or taking care of that obligation

signing up for one course

or another continuing education opportunity

frantically working out our own ways

that often lead down not-so-getting-to-where-you-need-to-be-destinations

I found out in a magical kind of way

these past couple of days

S A U N T E R I N G        I S       A N       A   R   T

No one taught me better than that than

G E O R G E

who would SAUNTER

up to our Breakfast table and

not-so-sneakily-ate-off-my-plate

scraps I wasn’t scrappy enough to gobble up first

Our waitress, Susan told us that George

had been a regular the past 10 or so years

and was a not only a Eater’s Favorite

but  a  great  Professor  of

S           A           U           N           T           E           R           I            N           G

with the truest of lessons:

THE COURSE:

SAUNTERING  LEADS  TO  DEEPER  CARING AND  COMPASSION 101

and just when you might be thinking that this course might be for the birds;

S A U N T E R

on and

S A U N T E R I N G L Y    WONDER  

a g a i n

t  o      g  l  o  r  y

In the meantime,

I’ll  have  to  look  into  the  legal  ramifications  of  my

l o i t e r i n g

charges.          .          .

 

Being a PLURAL

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Lots of Questions, huh.          .          .

Maybe none bigger

Maybe none more important

T                     H                     A                     N :

W H I C H     O N E ?

If you could only choose just one of your P U R P O S E S

If you could only choose just one of your R E A S O N S

If you could only choose just one of your M E A N I N G S

If you could only choose just one of your D E S T I N I E S 

WHICH  ONE  WOULD  YOU  CHOOSE?

What would be your criteria for choosing?

Would you go Simple.        .         .

Would you go Challenging.        .        .

Sitting on the Fence never got anyone much but a hole in their pants

and   a   sore   R U M P.          .          .

Does your  P L A N     A

include the Possibilities

of   O T H E R       O  P  T  I  O  N  S

Minister
Chaplain
Officiant
Professional Speaker
Writer
Published Author 
Counselor
Husband
Father
Grandfather 
Son
Brother
Uncle
Friend

These are the roles that pop into my own head

and occupy my life

on a daily basis

and if I had to be

S I N G U L A R

and not be a

P   L  U  R  A  L

which one would I pick.        .        .

not so much which one would I hone in on.       .       .

which ONE would I eliminate.        .        .

which ONE would I unravel

not only from my own multicolored Tapestry

but from the fabric of so many other lives

who have intermeshed with my own.        .        .

SHOULD    I    PUT    IT    TO    A    VOTE.          .          .

and just who are the proper Constituents

to   the

U   N   I   V   E   R   S   E       o f       C   H   U   C   K

Does the Sea

in all of it’s vastness

just lap the SHORE

O          N          C          E

.          .          .which wave is the most important one

.          .          .which wave is the least of all the others

Life is never counted by Candles on a Cake.         .        .

but   by   M O M E N T S

M          O          M          E         N          T          S

that don’t compete with another to yell out

I AM THE GREATEST.       .       .

M          O          M         E          N          T          S

that are threads to the

MOSAIC   OF    ME 

We don’t have to CHOOSE

WE JUST HAVE TO UTILIZE

and the best part:

You don’t have to PICK PLURAL

you just have to simply embrace it.           .          .

HAPPINESS  IS  IN  YOUR  HANDS

to      h o l d

to       s h a r e

to     r e c o g n i z e

Sometimes.     .     .

The biggest

M   I   S   S — T  A  K  E

is waiting for the   L  I  G  H  T

to TURN ON

without ever recognizing

it’s   never   been

O     F     F

.          .        .It’s not enough to embrace

YOUR  PLURALITY.       .       .

S H A R E     I T

(o f t e n)

in      all      of      It’s

W                 A                 Y                S

 

Professional Speaker, Author, Assurance Man