The Caring Catalyst

Who Cares - What Matters

A BAD DAY

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BAD DAY by Daniel Potter came out well over 14 years ago and we haven’t heard much from him since but he left us with a question:  WHAT QUALIFIES AS A BAD DAY?  And maybe even more: WHAT DO YOU DO ABOUT IT?

Ok. You had a bad day. Seriously, not to minimize, that but exactly what does the Bad Day look like for you?  No matter what your definition is, we can bet that it’s varied between each of us and all of us a bad day arrange from a wrong cup of coffee in the morning to a fender bender to the loss of a pet to the loss of a loved one to a bad bad result from a test, to any one who has had to suffer and now endure the effects of recent hurricanes and flooding or living in the Middle East.

person wearing red hoodie

Photo by Jan Kopřiva on Pexels.com

Whatever a bad day is, can we safely assume that somebody that doesn’t look like they’re having a bad day, just may be having one and that maybe just maybe, we can make it less bad, not better, just less bad?

Now guaranteed.          .          .If  you do that and you consistently do that.          .            . bad day’s may not completely go away, but they do fade and lose some of their sting.                 .                 .
IN THE MEANTIME:

Please, try hard not to make your bad day a bad day for Another

HANGING IN THERE

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It’s a common response and answer to the question of how are you doing?  And sometimes we shrug our shoulders or we raise eyebrows or we just heavy sigh, “Hanging in there.”  Pretty loaded response to an even more power keg kind of a question.          .          .Less of one that any ears ever stay around long enough to hear the next question: “No, really how are you doing. . . ?

We are all sometimes just hanging in there and the scene itself, the image itself, is not usually one that pops in our mind is it?  If it’s kind of the one that doesn’t pop in our mind, hanging, it can’t be good, even if it’s with strong fingers and hopefully not around our neck.          .          .But the truth of the matter is, it feels more around our necks, tightening than it does around our fingers loosening.               .            .

Be A Caring Catalyst enough to ask one more question beyond an answer that’s given to you because it’s the greatest way not only to show your care and to offer your compassion, but more importantly to loosen the noose, and free somebody from it.             .            .

HANGING IN THERE
no matter how we
Frame It
or decorate it up
or glamorize THERE
I’m still Hanging
             Dangling about wildly
Oh that my tired fingers don’t weaken
My nail beds don’t rip
and hold strong
And that the Hangman’s noose
doesn’t slip from grasping hand
to tighten away all that’s left of me
around my neck

UNLOOSE THE NOOSE.            .             .
WE ALWAYS HAVE THAT POWER
OVER ANOTHER
UNLOOSE THE NOOSE

NOT JUST A HAT

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IN A WORLD WHERE WE ARE KNOWN AND OFTEN CHAMPIONED 
FOR ALL OF THE HATS WE WEAR.           .            .

WHO WOULD THINK
IT’S NOT THE ONE’S WE WEAR
IT’S THE ONE’S WE DON’T WEAR

THAT JUST MAY MATTER
THE MOST.      .      .     .
(Sometimes it all comes down to a hat.    .    .)

(My thanks to Amina Amdeen and Joseph Weidknecht, via StoryCorps.)

WHAT GRIEF LOOKS LIKE

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AND WE ARE ALL IN IT.          .           .
ALL OF IT
L             I             F             E
that has this amazing coin
no bank contains
but each pocket contains:
LOVE
with the flip side of
GRIEF

This is what grief is. A hole ripped through the very fabric of your being.
The hole eventually heals along the jagged edges that remain. It may even shrink in size.
But that hole will always be there.
A piece of you always missing.
For where there is deep grief, there was great love.
Don’t be ashamed of your grief.
Don’t judge it.
Don’t suppress it.
Don’t rush it.
Rather, acknowledge it.
Lean into it.
Listen to it.
Feel it.
Sit with it.
Sit with the pain. And remember the love.
This is where the healing will begin.

[Melancolie by Albert György]
This heartbreakingly beautiful sculpture is called Melancolie. It was created by Albert György (living in Switzerland, but born in Romania) and can be found in Geneva in a small park on the promenade (Quai du Mont Blanc) along the shore of Lake Geneva

S       O.                    .                    .
What does your GRIEF
really look like?
Please, tell me.            .            .
I’m not here to take it from you
.    .   .it’s not mine to have
but I’d be honored to
c o m p a n i o n
it
with you

 

JUST A MOMENT: IN THE FLICKER OF A FLAME

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BiGGER
BETTER
BRIGHTER
that’s what it’s all about in our world today, isn’t it.            .            .
and oh guess what.          .          .
we’ve been told countless times over
IN FACT
just watch the news
or just being in a group of people that you don’t even know
standing in line at a grocery store
or a coffee shop
S   T   O   P
Listen to all the bad news that the world is giving us
P  L  A  C  E  S
As if we don’t have those very dark places in our life
that are asking for what not a bonfire
not even a candle
or even a constant flame.        .       .
How about just a
F          L          I          C          K          E          R
just a flicker of Hope
and psssssssssssssssssssssssssst:
even if it comes from a
fake candle
that gives
it’s better than a brand new one that doesn’t.          .          .
so maybe the biggest question is:
ARE YOU THAT FLICKER
FROM A FLAME
AND LIGHT
A DARK SPOT
IN A DARK PLACE
TAHT NEEDS TO BE ILLUMINATED.            .           .
Are you?
BE THE SPARK
THE EMBER
THAT STARTS
THINGS
G  L  O  W  I  N  G

NEEDING TO BE MORE THAN JUST SOMETHING

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Sometimes LIFE calls for us to be more than just

S              O              M              E              T              H              I              N              G

BEING THERE

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In our darkest moments, we don’t need solutions or advice. We simply crave the warmth of human connection. A gentle touch, a silent presence – these are the anchors that ground us when life’s storms rage.

Don’t try to fix me. Don’t carry my burden or chase away my shadows. Instead, be the steady hand I can hold as I navigate my inner landscape. Sit with me in the quiet, bearing witness to my struggle without trying to change it.

My pain is my own to feel, my battles my own to fight. But your presence reminds me I’m not alone in this vast, sometimes terrifying world. It whispers that I’m worthy of love, even in my brokenness.

So when the night seems endless and I lose my way, will you simply be there? Not as a savior, but as a companion. Hold my hand until dawn breaks and I find my strength again.

Your silent support is the greatest gift you can offer. It’s the love that helps me remember who I am, even when I’ve forgotten.

~ Etheric Echoes
~ Art ‘Broken’ by Karen Wilcox

BEING THERE

Being There
isn’t a far away continent
another galaxy not yet discovered
in fact, it’s not a place at all

Being There
doesn’t have a street address
where Uber Eats will deliver
what might fill your stomach
but leaves the vastness of your hurting soul wanting more

Being There
is a You that is brought to an ache
that can’t be medicated or sedated
but when simply Companioned
knows no rival

You possess a Being There
that can’t be sold or bought
but readily given
If.    .    .

 

JUST A MOMENT: REMEMBERING TO FORGET

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WELL.          .          .
Have you.          .          .
Have you ever walked into room and forgot why you walked in?
Hey, wouldn’t be great if we could forget to remember
what we really need to forget to remember.        .       .
The wrong somebody did us.     .     .
The story somebody told about us.        .        .
The word they used against us.          .          .
Hard to forget all of those THAT’S
but we have a nice saying that salt-in-the-wound-STINGS:
FORGIVE AND FORGET
or how about this one:
“I’ll forgive you, but I won’t forget it.      .     .”
W               E               L               L
Maybe it’s time.     .     .
maybe it’s really time that we do forget to remember
Seriously, right now, right here,
what it is that YOU need to forget to remember.          .          .
Uhhhh, guess what.          .         .
I T
doesn’t take a lifetime
or ages
or conditions
I  T
can happen in, in, in just a moment.           .          .
The question is,
WILL
I  T

YOUR WOW MOMENT

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What’s your WOW MOMENT.           .          .

Was your WOW one of you ever been having been someplace and then your sensor came out your Boundary Guard rose up and it kept you from not saying what you really felt.            .            .            ?

W   O    W.            .            .

What’s your WOW moment?

Was it at a concert?

Was it at a play?

Was it a movie?

Was it just sitting there watching a sunset or watching one of your kids or grandkids
play.        .        .        ?

When’s  the last time you could contain your

W                    O                    W

and what
and when
do you think the next time will be.            .            .            ?

In the meantime, watch THIS WOW MOMENT again and then be about creating some:

W                    O                    W

ONE DAY

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The one day of it all is just as unthinkable as it is unimaginable and yet it doesn’t cancel out the one day of it all that’ll never make it across our calendars or all the ones we love and never have the chance to know or love that we call
family. . . .

HAVE YOU EVER THOUGHT ABOUT THIS:

In 100 years like in 2124 we will all be buried with our relatives and friends.          .          .

Strangers will live in our homes we fought so hard to build, and they will own everything we have today. All our possessions will be unknown and unborn, including the car we spent a fortune on, and will probably be scrap, preferably in the hands of an unknown collector.            .            .

Our descendants will hardly or hardly know who we were, nor will they remember us. How many of us know our grandfather’s father?

After we die, we will be remembered for a few more years, then we are just a portrait on someone’s bookshelf, and a few years later our history, photos and deeds disappear in history’s oblivion. We won’t even be memories.

If we paused one day to analyze these questions, perhaps we would understand how ignorant and weak the dream to achieve it all was.            .            .

If we could only think about this, surely our approaches, our thoughts would change, we would be different
people.          .          .

Always having more, no time for what’s really valuable in this life. I’d change all this to live and enjoy the walks I’ve never taken, these hugs I didn’t give, these kisses for our children and our loved ones, these jokes we didn’t have time
for.            .            .

Those would certainly be the most beautiful moments to remember, after all they would fill our lives with joy.
And we waste it day after day with greed, greed and intolerance.            .            .
Anonymous,

The freshly dug earth resembles coffee grounds that will never be roasted, certainly never brewed, and most absolutely never drunk. Take a sip of what you can drink, and save her not what you have, not what you could have had, not what one day you might have had, but who you are: The Dust of the Earth; Brewed.  Enjoyed.  Savored and at its best, shared with another.            .            .

Professional Speaker, Author, Assurance Man