The Caring Catalyst

Who Cares - What Matters

S C O R E

By Leave a Comment

Lauren Hill–A Freshman basketball player at Mt. St. Joseph University in Cincinnati, Ohio.

(DIPG) Diffuse Intrinsic Pontine Giloma–An inoperable form of cancer with roots at the base of her brain stem and growing tentacles weaving through out her nerves.

T E R M I N A L

This isn’t a post about the unfairness of the situation. . .

This isn’t a post about WHY’S, HOW-COME’S, WHAT-FOR’S. . .

This isn’t a post about Lauren’s wish to compete in just one single game before. . .

This isn’t a post about an opposing coach and team being more compassionate than competitive. . .

This isn’t a post about ___________________________________________________. . . .

This is a post about Hope. . .

This is a post about Dreams coming true. . .

This is a post about saying “HELLO” and never GOOD-BYE. . .

This is a post about Living. . .

This is a post about________________________________________________________. . . .

The Lauren Hill’s will tell you what they’re afraid of the most isn’t the dying, the ‘what-is-next’s’, the leaving, so much as “the Leftover’s” the ones they’re leaving behind.

I’ve just celebrated twenty years at Hospice; started on a Halloween Day Monday in 1994.

I’ve seen lots of Pain.

I’ve seen lots of Anguish.

I’ve seen lots of Dying and Death.

I’ve seen lots of miracles that would have never been possible without all of those ingredients.

Mostly. . .I’ve seen not so much how to die as how to live.

I’ve had there in those rooms, at those beds, the best seat in and out of this World and I’ve been invited, entrusted to be there.

I’ve experienced that it’s the people, those magnificent golden strands, who have interwoven themselves into the very fabric of a Life, that makes life all that it is Life really is.

Lauren Hill gets IT.

She knows in essence what we all know: WE ARE TERMINAL.

I’ve done the studies–100 out of 100 of us are going to die.

That’s NOT the sad part–for Lauren or for us.

The sad part is not LIVING. . .

Not Living Before we Know IT. . .

Not Living During IT. . .

Not Living Through IT. . .

Not Living After IT. . . .

It’s a LIVING that DEFIES cancer, death. . . .

Lauren Hill proved that she is a huge DIS-EASE that Cancer has for which there’s no cure.

She proved with a simple lay-up in the first and only basketball game she’ll ever play in college, that
L-I-F-E is not just spelled with Capital letters–but EXPERIENCED in a much larger way:

S C O R E

We’re a Story in The Book

By Leave a Comment

More than feathery pages. . .

More than words on paper. . .

We are all a Story in The Book.

Do you know this one?

A grandson of slaves, a boy was born in a poor neighborhood of New Orleans

His dad abandoned the family when he was an infant. His mother became a prostitute and the kid and his sister had to live with their grandmother. Early in life, he proved to be gifted for music and, with three other kids, he sang in the streets and became a professional of sorts by having coins thrown at him.

A Jewish family, Karnosvsky, who had immigrated from Lithuania to the USA, had pity for the 7-yr-old boy and brought him into their home. Initially given ‘work’ in the House, to feed this hungry child. Then he remained and slept in this Jewish family home where, for the first time in his life, he was treated with kindness. When he went to bed, Mrs. Karnovsky sang him a Russian lullaby that he would sing with her.

Later, he learned to sing and play several Russian and Jewish songs. Over time, this boy became the adopted son of this family. The Karnovsky’s gave him money to buy his very first trumpet; they sincerely admired his musical talent. When he became a more established professional musician, he used these Jewish melodies in compositions, such as St. James Infirmary and Go Down, Moses.

The little boy grew up and wrote a book about this Jewish family who had adopted him in 1907. In memory of this family and until the end of this life, he wore a Star of David and he said that it is in this family that he had learned “how to live real life and determination.”

The little boy?

Louis Armstrong. . .

More than feathery pages. . .

More than words on paper. . .

We are all a Story in the Book.

Hmmmmm. . .

What a Wonderful World, huh?

Pssssssst: You’re Story–it’s still be written. . . .

Make it E X T R A

Ordinary!

It’s quite the Symphony not only waiting to be fully composed, but

played. . .sung. . .heard!

You OWE it to the World. . .

and the World awaits.

Dinosaur Eggs Gone Bad

By Leave a Comment

images-1

A Potato is a Potato until it’s NOT

When my son, Connor was 4 his favorite movie was JURASSIC PARK. He had all of the Dinosaurs and knew them by name and characteristics.

His four-year-old imagination was just as wild as the Park and he believed Potatoes were actual Dinosaur Eggs and needed proper incubation.

His choice of Incubation Spots actually cost us about $1700.00 in JUST ONE SINGLE DAY!

It was the commode.

Uhhhh, Potatoes, err, Dinosaur eggs don’t flush so easily and they are even more difficult to come back up.

The ROTO ROOTER MAN can attest to this. He was out three times in just one day.

The third time might have been the worse.

I was coming home from a meeting and when I was coming down our street, my headlights caught the ROTO ROOTER sparkling emblem on the truck in my driveway A G A I N.

The last thing I wanted at that moment, nor did I pay for a $1700.00 Personal Parenting Class Consultation as he was coming out of my house that night was his expert advice.

His, “I’d watch my kid and what he puts down the commode a little bit closer,” wasn’t welcoming or calming.

Walking into the house, I noticed the bathroom light was on and Erin, my wife, and son were in there finishing up his bath.

I went in and asked Erin if I could have a brief moment alone with Connor. I remember escorting out of the bathroom and could easily imagine she probably got a little concerned when I shut the door behind her and more, heard the C L I C K of the lock.

Connor had a towel wrapped around him and I remember vividly, sitting him down on the side of the tub as I knelt down in front of him.

“I am so upset right now, I don’t even know what to do with you,” I said.

His bottom lip quivered and his eyes filled up with tears to the point of just about to overflow his lids.

He said, I think, the VERY ONE THING that saved his life that night:

“HUG ME!”

Ohhhhhhhhh, I hugged him. . .hugged him harder than he’s probably ever been hugged. I felt the air come out of him, I hugged him so hard. . . .

Dinosaur Eggs gone Bad.

We’ve all had the stench of our own Not-so-well-incubated Eggs gone bad, haven’t we?

We’ve all NEEDED those “HUG ME” moments haven’t we?

REAL COMPASSIONATE CARE gives HUG ME MOMENTS when they are least deserved, but most needed.

Our Vision isn’t always 20/20 at such times, even in

H I N D S I G H T

which makes those HUG ME MOMENTS even more necessary.

A Potato is a Potato until it isn’t. . .

So are Dinosaur Eggs.

COMPASSION doesn’t overlook the Mis-Planted Dinosaur Eggs, doesn’t excuse them or alibi for them…

REAL COMPASSION–the kind the World is sorely in need–

HUGS–anyway. . . .

And that

H A T C H I N G. . .

Well…

That Hatching is preciously UNCOMPARABLY RARE–

WHICH IS EXACTLY WHY WE NEED TO DO IT EXCESSIVELY!

McBrought It

By Leave a Comment

images

I’m impatient.

That’s a huge McUnderstatement.

Would you like a McClassic Example?

So very crowded was the line inside of McDonald’s that I went back outside, got in my car and got in the drive-thru line.

It was also a dramatic illustration of just how competitive I am, even with myself. My personal-no-one-even-noticed-Game was to get in my car, go through the drive-thru, get my order, park my car and get back into McDonald’s and eat my sausage egg McMuffin without the last person in line inside the store getting their order.

Little did I know that there was another game about to take place. . .

One with a couple of Winners.

I first heard her voice when I came up to the speaker to place my order.

Before she ever asked me for my order, she asked me this:

“Good morning. Are you having a good day?”

I told her I was having an awesome day and asked her how she was doing?

She told me, “Most Excellent.”

“Now what can I get for you to make the day better,” she asked?

I placed my order and was a little intrigued to find who this Order-Taking Wizard was.

She was young, and had a smile on her face that filled the window.

She told me what I owed her and as I handed her the money, I told her I owed her much more than that.

“How is it that you are TAKING orders but GIVING so much more than what you could put in a bag?”

She laughed and said, “I’ve never heard it put THAT way before.”

I thanked her for making my morning and she thanked me for coming through her line and told me it was good to see me.

I gave her my standard reply to that comment: “IT’S BETTER TO BE SEEN THAN VIEWED”

She laughed and that when I said, “Hey, thanks for bringing it. . .you McBROGHT IT!”

She yelled as I drifted away, “Thanks, you McBrought it, too!”

I hurried and parked my car and went back into McDonald’s to read the papered news and eat my Sausage Egg McMuffin.

Oh yeah, I was smiling big because I had beaten the people who were still in line waiting for their orders.

I WON!

…and then, and then I realized, I ready had W O N. . . .

When was the last time Some One McBrought if for you?

When was the last time you McBrought if for Some One Else?

Let the Game begin. . .

McBring It!

W I N

Yesterday’s News, Tomorrow

By Leave a Comment

images

It’s almost been a month. . .

If you think that news travels fast, time makes you forget THAT news flies even faster, doesn’t it?

It’s been just about a month since Robin Williams died.

There’s been many stories written, many movies highlighted and seen, many once-upon-a time’s and remember-when’s reflected upon.

Care for one more?

I don’t think I’ll ever be able to hear the name of ROBIN WILLIAMS or see another one of his movies without thinking about this. . . .

The story goes that whenever Robin was to be hired or considered for a role he would submit a “RIDER.”

[Read more…]

A Fan or a Follower?

By Leave a Comment

I’ve been a life long Pittsburgh Steeler Fan.

Now it comes honestly. I’ve been living in Cleveland since 1987 and I don’t think I’ll live anywhere else because I love the area and what it offers so much.

But. . .

I was born in Wheeling, WV and grew up about thirty miles away in Washington, PA, about a half an hour from Pittsburgh.

As much as I love the Cav’s (especially with LaBron and his supporting cast in place) and am an avid Tribe supporter, The Steelers…well, I just can’t give them up.

However. . .

I’m not a Pittsburgh Steeler Fan, anymore. I’m certainly not a Baltimore Ravens Fan and no, sadly, I’m not a Browns fan either.

After seeing the video of Devon Still and his four-year old cancer-stricken daughter and hearing that in the midst of all of his troubles, he actually finds out that he didn’t make the final roster cut of the Cincinnati Bengals…but included him on the Team’s Practice Squad, how can you not at least have a little bit of support for THAT team?

THAT they signed him to a newly expanded Practice Squad…

THAT he will not be traveling a whole lot and be able to spend precious time with his daughter…

THAT he will receive $6300.00 a week for his salary for being on the Practice Squad…

THAT HE WILL BE ABLE TO HAVE INSURANCE FOR MUCH NEEDED MEDICAL CARE…

goes well beyond what football is, promises, or ever hopes to be, even with the ultimate winning of the Super Bowl or MVP Honors.

I’d like to think, just because the Browns lost to the Steelers on a last second Field Goal after coming back from a 27-3 half-time deficit, their home opener next week will still be a sell-out–not because of Fans…but faithful, die-hard FOLLOWERS!

FOLLOWERS who, regardless of wins/losses, last-second defeats or stupid-game-losing-mistakes, still believe, still support, still root, support, wear the T-shirt. . . .

Are you a Fan or a Follower?

It’s not often or often enough to be sure, but when I watch a video like the one above or hear of a TRUE LOVE STORY like Devon Still and his daughter, I become a much more Compassionate, Committed Follower; my heart beats a little more proudly; my eyes become watery; my faith a little more restored; my Hope–more secured.

Are you a Fan or a Follower?

Sometimes…just Some Times…

there’s a new song that just doesn’t need to be heard, or sung, but followed!

Let The Dance Begin…and never end. . .my fellow Followers!

A Newer Testament

By Leave a Comment

images-2

Friday Afternoon in a nursing home.

Lots of activity for most, but not for her.

She had said often, maybe too often, because of her vascular dementia, that she was an old clock with not many ticks left.

It seemed on this Friday afternoon, she was right.

I received a call mid-afternoon from her Hospice Nurse telling me that she was actively dying; that she was mottled on her hands and feet and up her legs to her knees. She reported that she was having periods of apnea as well, up to fifteen seconds of not breathing at a time.

She called me because she knew that we had a special relationship over the past eight months and felt that the patient would have liked to have me there.

I let the nurse know that I was on my way, but still about a half and hour to forty-five minutes away. She told me that she would stay with the patient until I got there and that she already had set up for a Vigil Volunteer to be there later in the evening if necessary.

The nurse and I had worked together with many previous patients. She was good. She was very competent, caring, compassionate and ATHEIST.

I didn’t think that believing or not believing or anything in between made a difference when it came to bringing compassionate care.

We had many discussions about “The whole God thing,” mostly brought up by her. I never forced those discussions or any of my beliefs. I had much admiration and respect for her and knew the care she brought to the bedside.

[Read more…]

Christmas in July

By 2 Comments

images

Christmas in July. . .

A Retail Owner’s dream and hope for ‘all the fears of all the years’ or at least this year’s bottom line.

When was the first time you remember hearing of Christmas in July?

It may not be the first time, but it’s certainly my most memorable time–July 1979.

I was a getting ready to start my final year at Lexington Theological Seminary and I was NO Billy Graham in the pulpit. I was taking a mandatory Practice Preaching Class with 9 other colleagues. We listened to each other’s sermons and then, quite brutally, butchered one another in what was suppose to be constructive critiquing.

V I C I O U S !

We gave three sermons each during the Term. It was my third and last one. I, uhhh, I really hadn’t done too well with my first two outings.

This third one wasn’t showing much promise. I had been up all night, being on call at the University of Kentucky Medical Center, to fulfill my Clinical Pastoral Education credits.

I WAS NOT going from a full-manuscript–word-for-word–written down before me, which was highly usual for me at that time.

I was picked to go first for this 8:00 a.m. class and Starbucks had yet to be invented.

I know that my mouth moved but it was my heart that spoke.

[Read more…]

A Moment, A Lifetime….

By Leave a Comment

Amazing how a Lifetime can actually be lived in a moment…and often is.

Some people who watched this short video, that seems to be flying all over YouTube and the Internet, have said it was staged.

Some have actually criticized the man on the steps, who shared his pizza, couldn’t have been that poor because he had money for not so inexpensive cigarettes.

Some assume that this is a nice little story, maybe even a beautiful parable of how to Receive by Giving.

Some have stated it’s a waste of a little over a minute they’ll never be able to reclaim in their lives.

Some believe that the biggest problem in our society today is that we enable a whole generation of homeless to become nothing any greater in their day to day lives than just being homeless.

Some believe that God helps those who are only out there helping themselves and others.

Some think that altruism is all-too-much.

Some think we give to get.

Some consider that what they have worked for and have is Their’s NOT to share freely.

Some trust that by giving pieces of pizza is no way to show others how to make their own.

Some anticipate being punished and discriminated against by not giving to every need before them.

SOME…

THEM…

THEY…

are people.

When we clump the Some’s, the Them’s, the They’s together they become more faceless, less significant, and easier to neglect or simply not notice.

…Maybe it’s no longer about DESERVING or GIVING or Determining how many times PAST ONE is it alright NOT to be a Good Samaritan?

When we give every once in a while, we miss the truest gift of giving EVERY TIME.

When we fail to give…

WE FAIL…

badly!

Hmmmmmmmmm…when we fail to give some change, a few paper bills, sandwiches, blankets, gloves, coats, shirts, socks, shoes, a piece of pizza or____________________________________, we hold on to something that’s not wholly ours, or can be completely kept after our last pulse.

Yeah-but….

Ahhhhh, The “YEAH-BUT.”

Cage that vicious animal.

The “Yeah-But” becomes tame when we simply stop using it…

NOW!

False Identity

By Leave a Comment

S O M E T I M E S. . .

It’s not WHO YOU ARE

It’s WHO Someone Thinks YOU ARE

That not only matters, but which brings the most healing.

When you SHOW UP. . .

You just may not GIVE the GIFT you’ve come to render–

So much as Receive the Present you could no where else ever obtain.

When you’re falsely identified. . . you may never be more YOU than YOU could ever be or hope to be at THAT GIVEN MOMENT!

When you SHOW UP. . .

Hmmmmmmm…YOU may actually Show up…maybe for the FIRST TIME EVER in a way, even you’ve never recognized or that any mirror, real or magically has ever reflected.

SHOW UP…anyway!

Become THAT Image another needs you to be for them, then…NOW!

S H O W U P

Professional Speaker, Author, Assurance Man